#i made poor life choices last night so now i am here to kick the bee's nest and cause more chaos
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impishtubist · 11 months ago
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tell me more about romulus and hilarius dating please
OH BOY I'M SO EXCITED TO TALK ABOUT MY NEW OTP
(Also credit must be shared with @lynxindisguise and @spindrifters)
Okay, so, Sirius's twin Hilarius is a twink. And also has no sense of humor. He's extremely serious (ha) and dry. Also he steals his cousin Bellatrix's clothing all the time. He tries on Sirius's leather jacket and collapses under the weight. Hilarius is also in Slytherin like Regulus but is NOT about that DE shit. Sirius is afraid that Hilarius also wants Remus but Hilarius is like "no one wants your man Sirius. I don't even know why YOU want your man."
Romulus is big and buff and sexy and muscular and the alpha dom jock that everyone wishes Remus would be. He and Remus also get along really well! They're such good brothers! Romulus gets things off of tall shelves for Remus! It's very sweet. He's also a squib, so he doesn't go to Hogwarts, but he's there every weekend to hang out with his bro. Also we have decided that Romulus is the sports gay and the maths gay while Remus is the bookish gay. Remus is worried that Sirius is gonna fuck his brother and Sirius is like "why would I want that."
Anyway, all the art you see where Remus is huge and buff and Sirius is tiny? Yeah that's just Hilarius and Romulus actually.
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leandra-kinard · 7 months ago
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So. There's been a lot of speculation, and a lot of hot and lukewarm and some honest and valid takes about the new trailer and the potential of what might go down next ep.
I've been thinking thoughts, and I have my own personal stance on the matter. And no, I will not be 'taking criticism', because this is the way I view things in general, and it won't change. So this isn't me opening up a debate about this, this is just me sharing my personal views, which you absolutely can agree or disagree with. (So if your views on cheating are vastly different from mine, don't come at me telling me how wrong I am, I'm not doing that at you either)
That being said, here are my thoughts and beliefs.
Kissing isn't (automatically) cheating. For me, it highly, highly depends on the accompanying circumstances. There are kisses for shits and giggles that are not cheating. There are kisses happening under heavy influence of whatever substance - something that can render you legally not responsible for a lot of things, so how does it make you responsible for a moment's poor choice? There are kisses that are done deliberately with intention and feelings/high physical attraction involved, and THAT is cheating. When we look at the Buck/Lucy kiss, I didn't see it as huge a deal as many of the fandom did. The kiss itself somewhat fell into the second category. But what made it at the very least borderline cheating was the fact that Buck made a secret of it afterwards. Had he said "Look, something happened last night. I was drunk, then Lucy kissed me, and I didn't instantly pull back, but I didn't want to kiss her again or anything. I have no feelings for her whatsoever and I will watch myself in future a whole lot more to notice any signs of flirting, which, in hindsight, there were. I'm sorry." - then I think that's still grounds for a partner to be mad, sad, disappointed, but it's not really full-on cheating. Not in my book, by my definition.
Emotional cheating is much worse than physical cheating Being in love with someone and knowing it, imagining yourself to be with that other person, THAT is much more cheating by my definition than a fleeting kiss. And sometimes, depending on the circumstances, maybe even more than a drunken fumble or one night stand, but that is a very complex question. However, emotional cheating means you're not really in it with your current partner, pining for someone else but settling for what you can have out of convenience, fear of being left behind or some other highly egoistical motivation. That really sucks. (I've seen that take expressed on my dashboard as well, though with slightly different nuance to what I feel and believe, but pretty close)
So, taking these two of my underlying beliefs as the basis, what can I see happen in the next episode that would leave me feel okay with it, or happy about it, and what would make me feel iffy about it?
Let's start with the iffy.
Buck:
If, at any point in their drunken Hangover-movie escapades Buck and Eddie kiss, full on kiss (with maybe a little bit of tongue), and that kicks something lose in Buck, I would utterly hate that. Not that I wouldn't find it plausible that a kiss like that would trigger him realizing romantic feelings for Eddie, but that it happens now.
Someone else made a long post about negative stereotypes about bisexuals, and I agree. This is the promiscuity/bisexuals can't be trusted to be faithful stereotype, and I don't want Buck to ever be seen in that light.
Also, Buck JUST (and that post mentioned that too) convinced Tommy to come with him to the wedding, that he's ready for something... only to emotionally cheat (because it's that aspect for me rather than the kiss itself) on him the very next opportunity?
"But Tommy and Buck aren't in a relationship yet," I heard someone say, and well, yes. But this isn't REAL LIFE. It's writing. Things are crafted in a certain way to form a story, and stories have a purpose. The narrative gave us an arc where Buck seemingly wasn't ready for a relationship with a man yet, where he fucked up and had to fix that, had to take a leap and take some courage to make it work.
Just purely from a narrative standpoint, it would be so inconsistent to reverse that healthy step forward just one episode later.
From what we know about the episode, it also doesn't look like he's breaking up with Tommy in that episode. A lovely, potentially dramatic moment where Buck kisses Tommy in front of everyone as a means of 'coming out' is highly implied/likely. So that would mean him being aware of some feelings towards Eddie and still going through with that. And yeah. No. I'd really, really fucking hate that.
Eddie:
If they kiss at some point and it kicks something loose in Eddie, and he then goes back to Marisol... I'd have much less of a problem with that because it could still be explained and justified with him just being in utter panic about coming out. It would match the catholic guilt arc, and all his previous attempts at conforming to heteronormativity... BUT, if the relationship just continued as is and he'd actively use her as beard that would be shitty, even for poor confused, repressed, closeted Eddie.
The Not Iffy
On with Eddie:
If that kiss brings something to the surface in Eddie and he then breaks up with Marisol one episode later I would not consider that cheating or poor morals or anything of the sort. He wasn't aware of it until that moment, and as soon as he is aware of it and has had a little bit of time to process it, he draws the right consequences from it and breaks off a relationship he's not fully in.
So this would actually be fine to me. This could be the kick starter for a potentially long and complex arc for Eddie to a) come to terms with his sexuality and b) pine for Buck from a distance, because Buck is with Tommy and c) eventually, when the time is right, for Buddie to go canon.
Buck:
The kiss itself wasn't a serious or real kiss. I'd be okay with it, if it was some silly, exaggerated "MWAH" smack of the lips kiss, prompted by someone or something around them - I dunno, maybe one of the women there saying "Aww you're such a cute couple" and they going in for it just for shits and giggles; or Buck gushing about Tommy and what a great kisser he is and Eddie drunkenly, outwardly jokingly saying "Hey, I'm a great kisser too!" and them jokingly leaning in for a smooch, again, for shits and giggles.
Buck afterwards doesn't even remember it because it meant nothing in that moment, and so he's neither seriously physically nor emotionally cheating on Tommy in the slightest.
"But Buck has deep feelings for Eddie. How can he kiss him and not realize them?"
Well, see, Buck has been around Eddie for almost 6 years now and not realized them. They are so, so far past that getting to know and falling in love phase that it makes it a bazillion times more complicated to distinguish those deep platonic feelings from deep romantic feelings (because, what it comes down to in both instances is a deep bond; the bond of love you feel after years of dating isn't that different from a deep platonic bond. Again, Eros vs. Pragma and all that).
But Buck is *in love* with Tommy, he's just entered that exciting, chemically turbulent process of falling in love with someone which, with all the newly formed neural connections and all those hormones overrides anything else that has long since been present and is only now presented with the opportunity to take on a new nuance. Of course he doesn't get it, and he likely won't get it until much, much later, when he's falling out of love with Tommy again for whatever reason, or they break up amicably for whatever reason.
And THIS again is something that could easily go into the iffy, because I would really fucking HATE the implication that Buck needs to break up with Tommy to be with his One True Love. I don't want this to be a difficult and painful choice.
IF (when) Buddie goes canon, I want them both to be ready and free for it and not accidentally pushed towards it, or struggle with a guilty conscience for it, or hurt someone else about it. (Marisol wouldn't count in that context as Eddie would have broken up with her months ago and gone on his own long self-discovery trip).
So yes, even if for slightly different reasons, and even if my views on what constitutes 'cheating' may differ from a lot of yours, I agree that any actual MUTUAL feelings realization right now, under these external circumstances, would totally tarnish the beginning of the Buddie relationship.
Which also makes me hopeful it won't happen in such a way. Up until now, the writing has been extremely solid, and Buck's coming out arc has been done with so much care. I doubt they'd do something that ruins it. (But I'm not 100% sure of it either).
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waitingforwinterwinds · 2 years ago
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A Clash of Kings - 66 THEON VI (pages 827-839)
Theon's poor life choices (trusting 'Reek') come back to bite him.
-
...It's interesting that Theon keeps referring to it as Ned Stark's bed, Ned Stark's room, like even in his victory it's still not really his.
"Do you know a better way?" "Aye. I'll take my axe and stand on that drawbridge, and let them come try me. One at a time, two, three, it makes no matter. None will pass the moat while I still draw breath." He means to die, thought Theon. It's not victory he wants, it's an end worthy of a song.
The Ironborn are so dramatic.
... Sonovabitch! Don't you hurt Beth!
"O, I know," said Theon." It's a dish I tasted myself, or have you forgotten? I was ten when I was taken from my father's house, to make certain he would raise no more rebellions." "It is not the same!" Theon's face was impassive. "The noose I wore was not made of hempen rope, that's true enough, but I felt it all the same. And it chafed, Ser Rodrik. It chafed me raw." He had never quite realized that until now, but as the words came spilling out he saw the truth of them.
Yay! Why am i cheering over such a horrible confession? Oh, because Theon is finally reflecting on himself and identifying the root of some of his issues. This way lies character growth and emotional and mental healing.
... I don't know that Theon would enjoy being a brother of the Night's Watch, he's like GoT Jon, but more about the being in charge specifically, he probably wouldn't enjoy working his way up the ranks very much.
"- I had to pull him off her and shove my clothes into his hands-calfskin boots and velvet doublet, silver-chased swordbelt, even my sable cloak. Ride for the Dreadfort, I told him, bring all the help you can. Take my horse, he's swifter, and here, wear the ring my father gave me, so they'll know you came from me. -"
No one asked what you were wearing Ramsay. Why you gotta make it weird like a product placement in a CDrama? (Thanks for finally confessing your identity, assbutt!)
... A moment of silence for Cley Cerwyn. We didn't have him for very long, be he seemed nice.
Theon had given his word. This was not a time to flinch. Pay him his pound of flesh and deal with him later. ... The Bastard's backhand caught him square, and his cheekbone shattered with a sickening crunch beneath the lobstered steel. The world vanished in a red roar of pain.
This is a far more emotionally impactful betrayal than the show. D&D really undercut how out of control Theon's arc was going with their quips. "Thought he'd never shut up." "It was a good speech, didn't want to interrupt." It also undercut the loyalty (such as it is) of the Ironborn, and Theon's intelligence. Like yes it was a bad idea from the get go, but Theon was actually doing really well with the whole capture and hold of Winterfell for the most part. He was confident and in charge, not nervous and stumbling manically through a hype speech.
D&D suck at their job = 🥛
The last thing Theon Greyjoy saw was Smiler, kicking free of the burning stables with his mane ablaze, screaming, rearing...
*squints* why does that sound familiar? I think there's a house with a flame maned horse for a sigil, but I feel like I know that because I was looking for a burning/fire horse for a reason... one of the prophecies? Maybe? Meh, it'll come to me or it won't.
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torotoro0 · 2 years ago
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Enemies? Or....
`~Miles Fairchild x Reader~` {Part 3}
{Click for Chapters}
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Summary : Things are getting a tad bit awkward between you two, and not to add, Miles getting a bit romantic there.
A/N: Was part 3 fast enough for my children? YOU AND QUINT WERE BEST FRIENDS BEFORE JUST LIKE MILES AND HIM ITS JUST THAT YOU AND MILES DON'T GET ALONG WELL WITH EACH OTHER UNTIL NOW.
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Your Pov
As of what happened last night.... we don't talk about that, sure; Kate was aghast of me getting lost, and Miles picking me up rescuing me, considering I got lost.
However all that doesn't matter now, all that matters is I am laying down on my bed having the best morning of my short life.
!Ba-dum, Ba-dum!
I hastily get up and hit my head on the head board, whilst my hair getting stuck at the zipper of the pillows "well, it was only the best whole 10 minutes of my short lived-life" before that buffoon made a commotion, I thought as I roll my eyes while I arise from the mattress.
I proceed to walk to Miles' room, "knock, knock" I muttered "Come in" Miles replied in a raspy morning voice.
"Can you turn your loud crappy music off?" I blurted
"No" he nonchalantly answered
"There's still people sleeping and include me there but your crappy music woke me up, come on turn it off" I beg since I'm still too sleepy to argue.
"No" he taunted
"fine" I shrugged.
I go back to my room to get dressed, seeing you can't stop him in any ways my crappy brain can think of. I dressed myself in my usual "stay-at-home-all-day" attire. I proceeded to head downstairs since the smell of Eggos and toast makes me go nuts.
"Morning Y/N, did you sleep well last night?" Kate chimed
"Good morning Y/N!" Flora beamed, even early morning she is nonetheless full of energy. I wonder if I was also this energetic before.
"Good morning" I yawn,
"Oh darling, can you call miles for breakfast?" Mrs. Grose asked
"sure... I'll go" even if I hate his guts, that's all I can do to repay Mrs. Grose's kindness to me, I approach the stairs while stretching my body.
I soon arrive at miles' room,
The door is open?, it was a little open but was enough for me to see half of the room.
"Mile-", he opens the door from the bathroom half naked, water dripping down his stomach, towel wrapped around his bottom wet, the water on his hair dripping on the carpet.
"shit!" I murmur as I move aside trying to work out what the heck I just saw. He is fucking naked!
Then after 2 minutes the door opens revealing Miles, now dressed up in sweater and pants.
"What do you want?" he questioned
"were you the one who opened the door?" he added
"U-uhm, no! It was already open by the time I got here! and I was here to let you know Mrs. Grose called you down for breakfast!" I blurted, why would he think I was the one who opened it?.
"What are you so worked about? I was only asking a question" he shrugged and went downstairs, I was left there speechless.
After a moment of contemplating my life choices I went downstairs.
"Y/N what took you so long! I saved these eggos for you because miles said he would eat it all up if you won't be down here!" Flora exclaimed.
"Oh- thank you so much flora" I replied as I sit down to the seat far away form miles.
"So, uhm, Kate can I still teach you how to ride horses?" Miles questioned
"Of course, I'd love that" Kate replied
"Can me and Y/N come too please please?" Flora looks at her brother dearly.
"Fine, you guys can go, BUT if SOMEONE here won't intrude my lesson with horse riding" was that meant for me?!, I glare at him.
{LONG PERIOD OF SILENCE}
"Let's go after breakfast I guess?" Kate broke the ice, "Sure!" I exclaimed as I chomp on my Eggo.
Me and Flora are now sitting down on the stairs observing miles and Kates's lesson.
"Bring her in hard" Miles said as he whips the Delila.
Poor horse, if i was her I'd kick Miles' butt that it makes him fly to mars.
"Well done" He compliments her "You don't have to keep whipping her" Kate blurted.
"Yes I did" Miles began "you wanted to learn, and that's how Quint taught me" he added.
I roll my eyes "That's not how Quint taught me though" I concluded, "He said you have to make a bond with your horse for it to listen to you, strong or not" I added.
"Quint taught me a different lesson than you, he taught you that because your too weak for what he teaches me" He shrugs as I sit there in annoyance.
"Miles I'm bored!, can we do something else now?" Flora complained, "What do you wanna do?" He replied.
"Can we show Kate the Koi pond?" she suggested
"Oh yes! the koi pond!" I beamed.
"Its floras favorite part of the garden" he looked at kate "Let's check it out".
Miles and Flora ride Samson while me and Kate ride Delila and of course, I drive her. We arrive at the koi pond, I went down and ran to where Flora and Miles were.
{TIME SKIP TO THE KOI POND}
"Shit! LOOK!" I pointed to where the crow was eating a fish
"STOP!" flora cried out at the crow
"Get the hell off of her!" miles yelled.He looked at the fish for a moment then-
!STOMP!
We three looked flabbergasted with what miles just did, he stomped on the fish mercilessly.
"Miles!" Kate looked at him "What are you doing?!" she looked so horrified.
"Nothing should have to suffer" Miles replied and then he walked away.
{T I M E S K I P to the next morning}
I wake due to the commotion downstairs.
"Maybe we could go to town and buy a new Koi fish?" I heard Kate asking as I enter the room.
"Morning Y/N!" flora as always excitedly beamed,
"Morning guys" I replied
"Y/N, Do you wanna go with us to town?" Kate turned to me
"uhm, sure why not" I agreed, no one wants to mope around this house always ya know.
"I- I don't want to" Flora disagreed
"You know flora doesn't leave the property" Mrs. Grose warned
"You don't have to go darling" Flora smiled.
"Miles and Y/N can come with you" She suggested.
"What if I ask my special friend huh?" Miles chimed in
"Want me to try? he looks at flora then to the mirror
"Will you keep me and flora safe?" he asked "You will?" gosh he just answered for himself
"Kate and Y/N too?" Flora looks at Miles.
"And them too?" wow what a good actor he is, I roll my eyes
"Really?" he turned to flora "He says you have nothing to worry about" he smiles.
"Well- ok let's go!" Flora excitedly yelled.
We proceed to go in the car, and I sat in the back with Flora.
{Time skip to where you guys are almost at the gate}
"Please stop I don't wanna go" flora complained as we approach the gate
"Oh, no honey were almost at the gate we'll be fine" Kate consoled
"I don't wanna go! stop!" flora yelled as she unbuckles her seat belt and trying to open the door.
"please stay in your seat flora" Kate ordered
"Kate stop the car" I demanded.
"Miles tell her to stop or I will die!" Flora cried out.
"Stop the car" Miles looked at Kate, "Y/N I don't wanna die!".
"KATE STOP THE CAR!" I yelled, the child has already cried but this bitch still won't stop?!,
"STOP THE CAR OR I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" Miles retorted
Kate stops the car, he opens the door and flora gets out, I follow her to where she was going.
Miles Pov
I open the door so Flora could get out and Y/N followed her, along with me getting out last.
As Kate open the door I slam it against her face.
"I know what your afraid of, keeping the lights on won't keep you safe" I taunted and with that I went after Flora. (boy why won't you include Y/N in your sentence🙄)
I arrive at the sight of Flora and Y/N feeding Delila apples, I lean unto the stable of Delila.
"Are you okay Flora?" I question.
"I'm fine, but Kate really scared me awhile ago though" She murmured.
{After some time...}
Flora?" Kate calls her.
"Leave her alone" Y/N replied without looking back "Flora can you look at me-".
"She doesn't want to talk to you" I block her way. "You terrified her" I cautioned.
"Where'd they find her anyways?" Y/N announced looking at her.
"You know you need to stop talking to me like that" she approach Y/N.
"Your not our mother, your not our family, So stop pretending to be" I retorted
"... And you can't talk to Y/N like that" I look at her full of hate.
"[scoff] I'm leaving" she says turning around.
"Yeah, go ahead and leave" I went on "Leave just like everyone else", she runs out and our gazes follow her"
A/N: was this chapter enough for you children?👍‍
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midearthwritings · 4 years ago
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Be Mine
A flower, for he must know your heart belongs to him.
Words Count : 2,138
Pairing : Dwalin x Hobbit!Reader
Warning : None
Author's Note : A little Valentine's day special because I'm soft for Dwalin and hobbit reader. Sorry not sorry (at all).
And because I'm feeling extra nice, here is an article that will tell you all about Valentine's Day's origins, back to its pagan roots.
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Cradled in your hands, the fragile flower was lying comfortably, waiting for you to finally make your move. Its red petals were big and bright, free of any damage the weather or wild animals could have caused. They were staring back at you, reassuringly. You could almost hear them whisper soothing words. Carefully, you brought it to your face and inhaled the lovely smell, black pistils tickling your nose. It wasn't as beautiful as the ones you grew, back home. And if you had been in the Shire, you would have gathered a big bouquet. But you were not in the Shire, you were on the road, probably walking to your ultimate death. And there wasn't any garden, only wilderness. So this single wild tulip would have to do.
Before, this day had meant nothing. It had been an excuse for those who where merely interested in you to gift you with bouquets. And each time, they had been met with rejection. Until now, the only love you had ever felt had been for your friends and your garden. Back in the comfort of your Hobbit hole, only the Sun rising each morning had been able to make your heartbeat quicken.
Now, it was different. The feelings had taken you by surprise, and for long you had refused to acknowledge them. But when you were traveling with the one your heart so desired, and had to see him at every moment given, it was hard to stay in denial.
The flower was still there, reminder that you were to gift it to him.
But how?
You turned around, looking at him from your spot. Even doing something as simple as packing his belongings, he looked so very intimidating. Centuries separated the two of you. He had seen war, disasters. He knew of sorrow and death. As for you, well, a piece of pottery you really liked fell to the floor, once, it had made you sad. Compared to him, you were just a simple Hobbit from the Shire that everybody would forget about after they passed.
You sighed and your eyes dropped back on the tulip. Gently, you brushed the pad of your thumb against a petal. It was soft under your touch. Like an infant's skin.
"What is it that ye have there?"
Startled, you jumped—quite harshly���, sending the flower to the ground. With an annoyed squeal, you picked it up and blew on it a little to get rid of any dust or dirt that had found its place on the poor vegetal. You stood up, facing the dwarf.
From afar, he had been intimidating, but here, right in front of you it was worse. His tall frame, taller than the others, swallowed you up whole. His insistent gaze was piercing right through your soul and you felt your blood rushing to your face.
Perhaps, now was your only chance. The company would have to depart soon and you wouldn't stop until night. The pounding in your chest was echoing in your entire body.
With one last glance at the delicate little thing, you held your hands out to him.
"It is, ah, it is a flower." You stuttered, looking anywhere but at him. " It is a flower for, for you."
Maybe you had spoken louder than you intended to, because you were surrounded with silence. To make it even worse, you knew all eyes were on you, as if you were some sort of strange creature no one had ever seen before. Actually, you were, given the fact that most of them had never met a Hobbit before. But that was not the point now, was it?
Brush of rough fingers against yours made you look back up and you watched, embarrassed, as the soldier took the flower away from your grip. His eyes were glued to the tiny looking plant in his hand, and his eyebrow rose up slowly.
"A flower?" He asked, his eyes meeting yours again. "For me?"
Another shy squeal escaped your lips, and you nodded rapidly.
"What d'ye want me to do with it?"
The words were like a punch right in the stomach. It had taken you time to pick the prettiest out of the lot. You had chosen it with care and love. Did he not like it? If the feelings were not returned, why would he take it? To publicly humiliate you, or something like that?
Defeated, your shrugged your shoulders and brought your hand to your lips. A bad habit of yours when you were feeling down, and today was no exception. You began to chew on your thumb before having your hand batted away.
"Don't do that. Ye'll make yerself bleed."
You muttered a quiet apology. Dwalin shook his head and placed the flower in one of his pockets, on his chest. He patted the place and you frowned. Now this was unusual. In the Shire, if one didn't return another's feeling, they wouldn't take the gift. They would politely reject the offer and move on. And hadn't the dwarf just rejected you?
"Pack yer things, Halfling, we're leavin soon."
And with that, he walked away, leaving you alone and confused.
That day, the weather was on the company's good side. The Sun was clement, so was the wind. You were walking in the front, alongside of Thorin's nephews, unaware that you were being watched. You hadn't been the only one left tormented with the events of the morning. All the way in the back of the line, Dwalin was lost in his thoughts, the flower still secured in his pocket. His mind was filled with questions, such as why you would gift him with a thing as useless as this one. At the broken look on your face when he had asked, he hadn't been able to find the strength to refuse. And so, the soldier was now traveling with a flower stuck in his clothing.
Carefully, he approached the only one who he thought would be able to help him out.
"Burglar."
The same way you had this morning, Bilbo jumped, startled by Dwalin's deep voice. His hand found its way up to his chest, resting in the place of his heart.
"Master Dwalin, you have to stop creeping behind people like that. One of this days, someone's heart will stop beating."
Sensitive Hobbits. So easily scared. The dwarf was still wondering why the wizard had brought the both of you along. A poor excuse of a burglar and you. But he was in no place to question the decision. And so, he got along with it.
Carefully, to avoid damaging it, he grabbed the flower and showed it to the Hobbit. The latter frowned and held his hands up.
"Ah..." He began, his cheeks reddening. "I am very flattered but, ah well, how to say that? The feeling is not returned."
The burglar's nonsense made Dwalin shake his head. It was terrifying the quantity of absurdities Hobbits mouths could produce.
"What are ye sayin burglar? Yer little friend up there..." He explained, pointing at you. "Yer little friend up there gave me this. Why?"
Bilbo's eyes followed the direction of the Dwarf's fingers and his eyes met yours. He watched as you quickly looked away. A smile grew on his lips, illuminating his face. Now, this was very interesting. A merry event, indeed. A strange choice, he thought. But well, it was not his place to say anything. In all those years of friendship, he had had to watch you refuse gift after gift, bouquets after bouquets. Love wasn't made for you, you only loved your friends. Or so you had said. He snickered, rather loudly.
His face radiating with a joy that made the dwarf uncomfortable, he explained :
"Well, Master Dwalin, it is a tulip. Oh, those we grow in the Shire are so much prettier. But I find this one to be very beautiful, very well chosen. I must say a bouquet of this specie would look very lovely and I would-"
"Will ye tell me why or not?"
Bilbo nodded at the soldier's interruption of his rambling.
"Once a year, Hobbits give flowers to those dear to them. It is a day to honour the ones we have wed, or confess our feelings. And tulips, Master Dwalin, in the language of flowers, mean the first confession of love."
Intriguing creatures. But not an unexpected gesture, coming from them. Dwalin looked down at the small plant. It didn't look the same. It was softer, like you. Its scent reached the Dwarf's nose. He hadn't been there for long but he could remember the essence that had floated in your home. And it smelled like it, like your home. It reminded him of you in every way, no matter which angle he looked at it. Now, he could see.
"I need yer help some more, burglar."
The night wasn't particularly scary to you. It was something peaceful, even. And night was often the time of grand parties amongst Hobbits. Yet, far from everything you knew, it wasn't comforting either. Silently, you sat on your bedroll, far from the fire.
You sighed. Sometimes, you felt very lonely. You missed your friends dearly. Oh yes, you were happy that Bilbo was there with you. It made things a bit easier to go through. But it was not the same.
The tulip was still haunting your thoughts. Bright, beautiful and proud, living its best life in your beloved's garment. It had been mocking you all day long, the vivid color reminding you of the answer you were not given. Or rather the upsetting one he had served you. Childishly, you kicked at the ground and crossed your arms on your chest. It was unfair.
You froze, when a big hand was laid on top of your head.
"Ye seem mad, Halfling."
At the familiar voice, you relaxed. Although there was still tension in your shoulders. It seemed Fate wasn't done with you and wanted to torture you a little more.
You shook your head, chasing the hand away.
"That, I am not. Anger makes you stupid, and stupid gets you killed."
His laughter, loud and deep, pulled a little smile out of you. You stayed still as he sat down to your side.
"This is very well said. Yer startin to think like a real warrior."
At his compliment, your heart swell, and your body threatened to burst out with pride. In the corner of your eye, you could see the red glint of the petals, and the feeling died down. You wanted to rip it out of here, throw it on the ground and step on it the same way it had stepped on your love. But at the same time, you wished it would live timelessly for the dwarf to keep and cherish.
You sighed, for the hundredth time, when a folded piece of fabric came into your sight, making you flinch a little. Curious, you inspected it. It was simple, and you were certain it had been ripped from a clothing. The bumps told you there was something inside.
You looked up at your friend.
"What is it?"
"Take it. For ye." He replied, pushing it closer to you.
Hesitantly, you obeyed. With a swift of his hand, he ordered you to take a look inside.
Slowly, you unfolded it, revealing what it contained. The small branche decorated with dozens of tiny purple flowers caught your eyes first. It was radiant, and you couldn't believe he had managed to find some in the little time that had been given to him. You smiled, bringing it up to your face to inhale the sweet perfume.
Putting it back down, you noticed there was something else. A tiny piece of steel with a hole in it. It was engraved, the patterns really clear and neatly made.
"Yer burglar friend said Hobbits court each others with flowers." He explained, pointing at the plant. "Us, dwarves, we court with clasps we braid into our partner's hair."
Your head shot up. There was no hint of mockery on his face. You had offered him your heart, and he was now offering you his.
"Master Dwalin I-"
"Now, will ye deny me?"
You shook your head. That, you would not do. For sure. If it was no jokes, and it didn't look like one, you would not be as foolish as to deny a thing you had hoped for.
Delicately, you picked the small piece of hair ornament and handed it to your soldier, a soft smile tugging at your lips.
"Will you braid my hair, then?"
And so he did, working his strong fingers through your mane gently, while you cradled his other gift close to your heart.
Lilac, for the first feeling of love.
568 notes · View notes
minshookie · 4 years ago
Text
Petting Zoo.
Pairing | Stalker!Jungkook x reader
Genre | yandere,angst
Summary | “your secret admirer turned close friend wants to be more than just that, and he always gets his way.”
!warnings! | 18+ mature language, stalking , mentioned sexual acts, violence, sick pets, pet death...
| this is not in anyway shape or form a true depiction or representation of BTS, this is a work of fiction and is not to be taken seriously. For entertainment purposes only.|(this is my work, please don’t repost or steal)
Requested [closed for request] words: 2k.
A/N: another request done! I love taking a finishing request I just get so nervous in the end. Also trying something new. Any type of interaction is greatly appreciated! Edited, but please excuse errors. {should petting zoo be my first series?}
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He knew you’d love it, you’ve always had a tender heart. The bunny coo’ed as he gently placed her into the plush box. He knew you were lonely, your roommate recently left you for her boyfriend, he knew fully that you were struggling. He’d push his ear against the wall to hear you two bicker in the deep hours of the night. He didn’t mind, he’d save you...but only if you let him.
Knowing your financial struggles, Jungkook went all out to make sure your bunny had the best even providing a months supply of food. He fully planned on this being the light of your month, you’d never stop thinking of him. He secured the new pet under one arm and the equipment under the other, he pushed his door open checking if the hall was clear. Of course, nice and clear just how he needed it, he slipped through the door with stealth leaving the gift in front of your door. With care he pulled the note card from his pocket perching it on top of the punctured box. Heavily he knocked before slipping inside his rightful apartment.
Leaning against the wall he listened for you to open your door. Finally when you did, it felt like his heart was attempting escape. Expertly he creeped to his door looking through it cracked ajar, he heard you read.
“I’m hopping mad for you, take me in as a friend, from your lover.” Fearfully you opened the whining box. In awe you gladly took in his gift, without a second thought. His heart fluttered he felt like floating in love, like in the cartoons hearts in his doe eyes.
Shutting the door he skipped to bed, exhausted his mind finally at ease, he finally has a shot with you! His heart was racing. He rolls onto his bead, head full of sweet thoughts of you, the plans he had for you. Closing his eyes he knew, this is only the beginning.
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Overtime you’d grown fond of your new furry friend, inviting people over to meet your mysterious new fur ball of joy. With this new happiness and motivation, you started leaving your apartment more often. As a result Jungkook started seeing you a lot more and he loved it. He loved it so much that for some reason his schedule now aligned with yours almost perfectly.
You have a class? Oh so does he....would you like a ride? Time to head to work? How funny,him as well.....hop in!
Jungkook planned to be just what you needed, in a foreign place like this all you really needed was a honest friend. And he planned to be that and more. It isn’t hard to notice Jungkook loves it when you depend on him, you need him, your life would be in shambles without him. He knows it deep inside he believes it, but he knows you don’t. No worries for him though, you’ll see the truth soon...
Like any other day, like clockwork, Jungkook waited for you in front of your door like a royal guard. Today though he had plans for you, for days Jungkook perfected today’s schedule...big plans to tell you his feelings. Plans to pour his heart out to you, and to get yours poured to him, but something wasn’t sitting right.
you didn’t come on time, checking his watch like a mad man he paced in front of your door in anticipation. Your prolonged time inside threw off the agenda severely. Beside the settle irritation, he was worried something happened to you he was going insane. What if you left him? What if you died...what if someone kidnapped you?
Two seconds from ramming his fist against your door...Finally, while on the edge of his sanity your door creaked open. “Hey, running late today huh?” He looked your figure up and down. You weren’t dressed for the day, pajamas and Nikes weren’t your usual fashion choices.
“Oh, Kook it’s Bella she’s sick.” The whining animal sat curled into a ball inside of the pink carrier. Your voice floated to his ears, soft and worrisome. He crouched, looking into the dark cage. “Sick? Sick how?” He prodded his limber finger inside rubbing the frail animals head. “I-I don’t know she hasn’t been eating,her breathing is strange.” He could hear you on the verge of tears as he got up, slightly annoyed though he tried to hide it. “We’re late to class y/n maybe you should just leave her, she’ll be better later.” The way you batted your lashes told Jungkook he’d said something wrong. You griped the carrier locking your apartment door before begging to leave towards the elevator. “Wait Y/n where are you going?” You Kept walking carful not to rock the poor bunny too hard. “Kook, Bella is half dead and you want me to leave her? I’m taking her to the vet.”
He groaned coming closer as you waited for the aged elevator to reach you. “Yeah? Okay well wait for me I’ll take you.” The elevator stoped with a horrifying screech, you stepped in Jungkook was kicking your last nerve this morning. “I already had it planned for today.” He got closer barley missing the door, “Jin offered to take me.” The door closes quickly and you descend.
Jin? Did you say Jin? Like a angered child he almost stomped back to his apartment door. he threw his bag against it, crouching to search for his key inside. “If I knew she was going to bitch over the thing-” he cut himself off opening the door,kicking his bag inside. “ I bought the fucking bunny, who is he to take care of our bunny.”
He threw himself down onto his couch, unmotivated to go to class now, or do anything for that matter he decided to miss today, and maybe even tomorrow. He mentally facepalmed, of course Jungkook noticed you and the new older man downstairs getting closer. He didn’t think anything of it, until he saw him walking into your job when he came to pick you up. Handing you his cheap flowers and gifts whenever he’d see you around the building. Jungkook thought you were smarter than that, it made him fiery with anger thinking about him manipulating you. The only person that loved you was Him. How could you blow him off for some guy downstairs, some guy you didn’t even need.
He let his mind jump from one angering topic to another. Oh! And that fucking rabbit. Bella had been getting a lot of love from you recently, he didn’t mind he saw that pet as a connection between you two. But to suddenly you kick him to the side because the rodent refused to eat? From Bella to Jin, his head spun. He could feel his face heat up at the thought of Jin getting close to you in the car, touching you, playing with your hair. It made him sick, he could almost feel the bile in his throat. If it wasn’t for that walking ball of fur, you’d be in his car, getting touched and loved by him.
He sat up with a groan. “I’ll wait until she gets home.” He stood going to the kitchen grabbing a drink. “And I’ll talk to her, I’m sure she can explain, she’ll tell me the whole story.”
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It seemed like decades before your laughter was heard coming into the hall. He’d been sitting facing his door, waiting for you, his hair disheveled his mind distraught. “Thanks Jin, talk to you later.” Your voice so sweet to him he felt himself physically react, oh how he missed you today. He heard the creak and slam of your door. What am I to say? Maybe I should ask about Bella? He got up fixing his appearance before leaving and turning to your door.
He cleared his throat before letting his knuckles beat against the hardwood. “Coming hold on!” He took a step back painfully waiting. Thankfully you arrived quicker than expected. “Hey Kookie.” You answer in hushed tones. “Hey, going to work today?” You shook your head “no, I called out on emergency.” He nodded hands in his pockets. “How’s Bella?” You looked behind yourself quickly, “Uhm, she’s a bit better just weak would you like to come see her actually?”
He nodded enthusiastically following you in, “sit down if you’d like.” You left him to go retrieve the sickly pet. He stood admiring the room, everything from the pictures to the decorative items resembled you, not only did it look like you but it smelt like you. Jungkook could swim in this scent all day.
“Here she is, a sleepy little one.” The soft hum coming from her sleeping figure earned endearment from you. Jungkook came closer rubbing her back softly. “So, why didn’t you ask me to take you this morning ?” You looked up from Bella. “I thought that you were gonna to be in class.” Your head tilted adorably. “Mm no, I’ll always wait for you.” He took Bella from your motherly arms. “Oh how sweet of you.”
“Hm So, since when have you been taking to Jin?” He looked at you inquisitively. “Jin? Eh Jin is... We’re...complicated, I’ve known him since I moved here he’s helped me quite a bit.” You answered keeping a loving gaze on Bella.
Jungkook felt himself grip the rabbit tighter he looked at you with furrowed brows. “Huh?” “I met him in a bar with my ex roommate, we’ve been talking since then.” You explained lightly trying to not hurt his feelings, of course you knew how Jungkook felt, and it wasn’t mutual.
You plopped onto the couch patting the cushions inviting him to sit. “He moved downstairs to be closer, he’s making a good effort but I’m not sure how I feel right now.” Sighing you toyed with your fingers, unaware of the grimace on Jungkook’s features.
He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, he felt that he’d been lied to and he didn’t a appreciate that. “What do you think Koo, what should I do?” You asked, getting anxious at his sudden silence. He was upset and he was doing his best to hide it, with a sigh he sat next to you. “Don’t let him fuck up your mind y/n.” Confused you looked up to him, “we both know what you want.” You crossed your arms, curious. “What’s that?” Already being aggravated, he sighed deeply,letting the now awake rabbit escape onto the floor. “Me.” You were visibly taken aback by his unusual boldness.
“Uhm Jungkook.” Anxiously you rubbed the nape of your neck. “Y/n don’t pretend for Jin’s sake, I can hear you through the walls talking to friends about me.” Without noticing he started leaning towards you. “I’ve heard you in here being lewd with yourself, who was on your mind.” He could read the fear in your eyes, you grew uncomfortable at the personal information he was throwing at you. “Jungkook please wait-” “who was it?” You pushed a firm palm into his chest in attempts to get him away from you, the sweet dorky neighbor you’d befriended now lurking over you like a beast. “Who do you love y/n, c’mon?” “Kook-” “before you answer, know that I’ve always loved you it’ll never be complicated with me y/n you want better I can give you much be-” you pushed his muscular chest roughly to shut him up, your back now touching the arm of the couch. “I’m with Jin, Jungkook please leave I’m afraid.” A statement you thought would save you, turned to bite you right in the ass.
You could visibly see the anger play along his features, grimly he chuckled. “I’m not going any-fucking-where until you come to your senses.” He gripped the hand you had up against him. “Jungkook that hurts please I’m scared!” “You should be, how dare you use me, fucking whore I loved you!” He ran a finger over his lips, his emotions clashing harshly with each other. “I love you...but you probably let Jin fuck you silly, disgusting...but don’t worry you’ll learn.”
He proclaims pushing you to the floor, he rushes to slam and lock your apartment door. He turned and saw you clutching the coffee brown rabbit,sobbing. “Y-you fucking stepped on her Kook!” the whining of the pained animal began to creep onto his nerves. If that rodent wasn’t here you would’ve been going out with Jungkook today, and Jin wouldn’t stand a chance. He bent down pulling Bella from your clutch, with little to no struggle.
“You get what you want, and you run with it, you get what you want and you go snuggling under some other asshole huh?” He held the injured animal in a primal grip. Uncontrollable he’d held in his anger, his love,and his thoughts for far too long. “Kookie please...please...please no, l- I love you!” You desperately pleaded for your pets fragile life. “Never have I met a bitch that lies as much as you.” Coldly he responded, not appreciating your falsehood, he gripped Bella’s neck harshly putting the disturbed animal to death. “Jungkook!” You let out a shrill scream. “I bought her I can kick her to fucking curb if I want, go ask Jin for one, or did he lie and say he bought her.”
Silently all you could do is whimper and sob, the thud of Bella’s body made your throat constrict. His heavy steps near your quivering figure sending chills through you. “Say it like you mean it.” With no mental strength to look up, you collected yourself enough to speak. “I lo-ve you j-Jungkook.” He groaned. “Suck it up it was a fifty dollar animal, you’re pissing me off.” You’ve never heard him in this tone. “I love you so much, Kookie.” He gripped your chin forcing you to look at him. He pulled up his other hand slowly touching your face causing you to flinch. “Ah Ah don’t run.” He cleaned your glistening face.
“Now, tell me who we hate.” He looked into your eyes darkly. “J-Jin.” His once adorable smile, now made you want to vomit. “Good, and I’ll snap his puny neck if he gets in our way.” He brushed more tears from your features. Giving into his temptation he gripped the back of your neck, bringing his lips to yours before pulling back to whisper. “Now tell me, who were you thinking about during those lonely nights?” You shook swallowing thickly “and you better not lie.” Closing your eyes in defeat, warm tears spilled from you like a fountain. “You Jungkook.” Pleased he kissed you warmly, while you resisted the urge to react. “Keep being such a good girl, and I’ll get you a whole petting zoo of bunnies baby...would you like that?”
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Not my image
386 notes · View notes
sundaysundaes · 4 years ago
Text
Spectra
Lee Donghyuck/Haechan X Reader/Female OC | Romance, Eventual Smut, Fluff | NC-17 | Soulmate AU, Childhood-Friends-Become-Lovers AU
The second part of Monochrome. Read the epilogue here.
Summary: Lee Donghyuck once believed in the concept of soulmates—how fate would connect a red thread from one lover to another, in a form of dreams and memories. That was how his parents met, that was how they claimed their happiness, and he wanted nothing more but to live his life the way they lived theirs. Until one day, as he sees her slipping away from his hands, he has no choice but to stop believing entirely.
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Donghyuck woke up with his heart in his throat. His eyes, as they bore into the ceilings of his room, swallowed by the darkness, were shaking in both fear and rapture. Two things occupied his mind, forcibly pushing his other thoughts away and rendered them pointless.
First, he knew it wasn’t just a dream. Like what she’d previously mentioned, it felt nothing like a dream. He was completely aware of everything, perfectly sane, and could thoroughly remember every detail, every scene, every word that she said even after he woke up.
Second, he was certain that it was a memory, and although he was in it, he knew it was her memory and not his, because there were parts of it that felt vague to him before but were crystal clear now as he saw it through her point of view. He had his first soulmate dream, there was no doubt about it.
So that brought him to the next question.
Why did he dream about her? She’d found her soulmate, hadn’t she? And she had explicitly stated many times that her soulmate was not him, but a complete stranger—one that she only knew by his face and not his name. So, wasn’t he supposed to be connected to someone else—to see someone else’s memories?
He leaned up, sitting on his bed with his elbows sinking into his thighs, his fingers yanking at the roots of his hair. “Fuck, I don’t get it,” he whispered to himself, feeling a little bit lightheaded from all these unsolved questions swirling in his brain. “Am I her soulmate? Do I still have the chance to be with her?”
But even a chance would be enough, he soon decided. Even just reliving her memories every night, knowing her better, seeing her longer, that would be enough reasons for him to continue with his hope.
Perhaps, he could believe in soulmates for a little longer.
There were a few short memories he saw in his first soulmate dream, most of them were from her childhood days which made him feel content to the point he wanted to never wake up because these flashbacks always had him in them. He was an integral part of her childhood memories, the one who shaped her into the person that she was now.
But the memory that shook him the most was the memory of the time they went to the beach during their summer vacation with his family. Donghyuck watched himself sneak out of their cottage in his grey hoodie placed underneath a beige varsity jacket. He saw a few months younger version of himself, grinning from ear-to-ear, as he shouted in whispers.
“Come on, Noona, hurry up!”
“Haechannie, it’s two in the morning!”
The sight of her had always warmed his heart, but in this dream he was having, her beauty seemed almost ethereal as if her entire being was a piece of art with the sole purpose of being loved and admired.
“Which is the more reason why we should hurry up before they find out, Noona, for God’s sake, come on!” He grasped her by the wrist, yanking her forward so he could close the door behind her. They stepped down the stairs in a hurry, their flip-flops making creaking sounds on the wooden surface.
“If your mom finds out and she—” She abruptly ended her sentence with a yelp as she tripped on her feet, clutching her arms around his shoulders for balance, pressing her chest involuntarily against his back. The boy threw a glance over his shoulder, clearly enjoying the way she had her arms wrapped tightly around his body. Smirking suggestively, he cooed, “Baby, you’re so aggressive. At least, buy me dinner first.”
“Asshole.” She retracted her hands at once, shoving him harshly until this time, he was the one who tripped down the stairs, falling face-first on the ground, inadvertently swallowing some sand into his mouth. She concealed her marbled teeth with her fingers as she giggled at the sight, but began to run for her life when he growled, “I’m going to kill you,” and chased after her trails with his arms reaching out to catch her.
The reason they had their feet dipped in the sand at two in the morning was simply because Donghyuck couldn’t sleep at the sight of her curling beside him on the thin mattress that was laid out in the living room. The cottage only had three rooms, one was used by his parents, another one was supposed to be used by her and his twin sister, and the last one was for him and his two younger brothers to snuggle up together in a cramped bed. But Donghyuck had insisted to sleep outside so he could watch a movie before bed and his parents didn’t mind, even if his neighbor ended up joining him in the middle of the night upon his request.
So when she fell asleep next to him, her face almost sinking into the crook of his neck, and her hand laying on his stomach, mistaking him as her usual body pillow, Donghyuck had to distract himself before he thought about doing something sinful. So he shook her by the shoulder, told her to wipe the drool away from her face, and asked her to follow him outside, mentioning that he suddenly had the urge to stargaze. And although a train of complaints kept tumbling down her lips, she followed—she always did, no matter where he led her to.
“What are you doing?” He questioned the girl who stood next to him, looking like she wanted him to do something. “Sit down next to me, come on.”
“I’m waiting for you to be a gentleman.”
“What?”
“Aren’t you supposed to lay down your jacket on the ground so this lady right here won’t have sand on her shorts? You’re wearing two jackets, after all.”
“Yeah, but not for you to sit on it.” Donghyuck, who had already sat down on the damp sand, rolled his eyes. “You watch too many dramas. Guys don’t do that in real life.”
“It’s you who don’t do that.” And with pouty lips, she quietly added, “Jaemin did that for me.”
“I heard that.”
“I wanted you to hear it.”
“And so how are things going on with this Jaemin so far? Is he still giving you sloppy blowjobs on the weekends?” He faked a gasp, one hand covering his mouth for dramatic effect. “Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot he broke up with you.” A cheeky grin crawled up his face. “On. Your. Fucking. Birthday.”
“Whatever.” She blushed. “At least, he’s hotter than you’ll ever be.”
He seemed more annoyed than he should, and she was on the verge of thinking whether her joke was going too far but Donghyuck exhaled loudly into the air, standing up on his feet again and tore his varsity jacket off his body. “Here,” he said, as he spread it out on the ground. “Your majesty.”
“Why, thank you, my prince.” She giggled, plopping down on the sand. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
And they ended up throwing playful kicks and punches to each other again like the other million times they did, before they finally laid side-by-side on the sand, sweaty and out of breath.
“Haechannie.”
“What?”
“Do you think we'll still do this after we get married and have kids?” She asked, gazing at the stars that gleamed radiantly in the black night sky.
“Us?” Donghyuck rubbed his nose, a speck of sand making his skin itchy. “Like, in bed? Well, I don’t know about you, but I think I might be into rough sex, but maybe after a few years deep into our marriage so you won’t—”
“Not us getting married, you idiot!” She grappled another handful of sand, threatening to throw it on his face but Donghyuck already had his arms raised in surrender. “I mean, do you see us hanging out like this when we already have our own families to think about?”
“I don’t like to think too much.” He nonchalantly shrugged. “It’s still way ahead in the future. I’d probably die an early death from being too rich and handsome, anyway.”
“You’d die from being too dumb.”
“I was talking about me, not you.” He swatted her hand away when she was about to shove him in the chest. “Speaking of getting married, why don’t we make a pact?” Though his heart was racing a bit faster, he kept his lopsided grin intact as they shared eye contact. “If, after we turn eighteen, we end up having no dreams of our soulmates, why don’t you and I get together?”
She unexpectedly blurted out laughing. “I can understand if you think that there’s a chance of me not having any soulmate, but the chance of me not finding anyone more decent than you as my husband? How dare you, Lee Donghyuck.”
“I’m just saying,” he repeated, turning on his stomach. “If by the time we turn thirty or something we still haven’t found anyone, why don’t you and I get married?”
“I thought we’ve promised somewhere along the way in our poor little friendship that we’d never talk about this again?”
“I think we’re mature enough to have this conversation by now. So, what do you think?”
She was still on the verge of laughing. “What I think about what, Haechannie, you’re being absolutely crazy and embarrassing—”
“Why is it so hard for you to just say yes and marry me?” He insisted, holding back a laugh himself because her smile was so contagious. “Is it seriously that gross for you to think of me as your husband?”
“It’s not that, it’s—Oh my God, okay,” she finally gave in, heaving the heaviest sigh before she sat up properly and turned toward him. “Look, you’re not exactly the most romantic person out there.”
“Hey,” he pouted, scowling a little. “I can be romantic. You just don’t know it yet because you’ve never seen me on a date.”
“Yeah? Then try me.”
“Try what?”
“Be romantic. Do something that can make my heart flutter for you, oh my mighty prince,” she jeered, throwing a challenging, mocking smile at him. “If you can make my heart skip a beat, I’ll marry you.”
He scoffed. “Man, I know you’re shy but you don’t have to challenge me with this pathetic dare if you want to marry me that bad.”
She stood up immediately. “I’m leaving.”
He was chuckling as he captured her by the wrist. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry, wait.” He tapped his chin, nibbling slightly on his bottom lip. “Let’s see… What should I do…. What should I—oh!”
She raised an eyebrow, seeing him stand up on his feet. “What are you doing?”
“I’m gonna take you dancing.” He offered her his hand and she stared at it with reluctance written in her eyes before she sighed and took it. He pulled her abruptly with all his strength to make her stumble on her feet, but he caught her just in time by circling his arms around her waist, leading her close until they’re chest-to-chest.
“Blushing yet?” He teased, smirking.
“I’m starting to think this is a bad idea,” she flatly said, pushing him away but he took her hand and placed it on his shoulder. “What are you doing?”
“As I said,” he paused, taking his phone out of the pocket of his jeans and running his thumb along the screen. He chose one of the acoustic songs in his music playlist—Ed Sheeran’s Thinking Out Loud which made her scrunch her nose in protest—turned his speaker to the highest volume and hid the phone in the pocket of his hoodie. “I’m gonna take you dancing.”
She snorted but followed his lead, landing both of her arms on his shoulders. “Why am I not surprised that your song choice is something from Billboard’s Top Twenty?”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I left my compilation of classic slow dance songs back at my house, along with my ballet shoes and my tutus.”
She narrowed her eyes at his sarcasm. “Okay, Ed Sheeran it is then.”
The first half of the song went by in what felt like hours to her from all the tension that arose between them. While she moved rather awkwardly, trying to match how his body slightly swayed from one side to another, Donghyuck smiled, softer than she could even begin to imagine, and gently asked, “Can I move closer?”
She could faintly feel his breath on her face even in their current position, but she gave a weak nod and answered, “S-sure.”
Donghyuck held back a grin. “Was that a stutter?”
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I do stutter from time to time, idiot. Everyone does that.”
“Okay, okay, geez. Cranky, much?”
“I’m just not sure if—” she took a sharp intake of breath when he suddenly leaned closer, his lips almost grazing against hers before he pulled away to give very little space between them. “You’re not playing fair,” she whispered, trying not to focus on his lips.
His eyes were half-lidded as he took in her features. “You didn’t make any rules.”
“I hate you.”
“Man, I was hoping you’d feel otherwise, but,” he guided her hands so they could circle themselves around his neck, as he moved his own lower on her body, resting on each side of her waist. “I only just started, so…”
She was breathing a little heavily, but not expanding the space between them, afraid to lose the game. She didn’t want to give him any more reason to ridicule her. “Right, so, what’s next? Because you’re not making me feel anything with this, Haechannie.”
He slowly brushed her bangs away from her eyes, his fingertips grazing against the soft skin of her temple. “Have I told you about the day when I realized I love you?”
That question almost rendered her frozen on her feet, but she caught herself at the last second. “A pick-up line?” She tried to pretend it didn’t have any effect on her by scoffing out loud. “Seriously?”
But Donghyuck was not laughing nor reciprocating in any teasing manner. His eyes were dark and deep, with all kinds of emotions swirling behind them. The tone he was using when he spoke his next words was filled with nothing but sincerity and candor.
“Maybe I’ve loved you since the first time we met, but…” He added a small chuckle as if he was shy and she wondered since when did he become such a good actor? “I guess I was too young, but I do remember that one time when I saw you and I thought,” he exhaled, reaching up a hand to cup her cheek before he pressed his temple against hers, “God, I gotta have her.”
She gulped hard, feeling her breath hitched in her throat. She just hoped he wouldn’t notice.
“You were wearing this beautiful red dress that I’d never seen you worn before, but it wasn’t just how pretty you looked that caught me off guard.” His words didn’t have as much effect on her as the tender way he regarded her with his deep, brown eyes, just utterly mesmerized by her everything. “It was the way you call my name with that adorable shy smile on your face, asking me about how you look and I just….” He leaned down so they’re eye-to-eye, with his fingers holding her face and his thumb caressing her cheek. “I just thought that maybe I want to keep you for myself. I want to hear you say my name, to show me that smile again, over and over—every day, for the rest of my life. I don’t want you to belong to someone else. I want to be the only one you can think about, both in your reality and your dreams.”
As if she was being hypnotized, her eyes began to solely focus on the way his mouth was shaping praises and terms of longing.
“I’ve never seen you as a friend, or a sister.” He was so close, so warm, so intoxicating. “I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything—anyone—as much as I want you now and it fucking hurts to hear another guy’s name escaping your lips because I just really…” He sighed. “Really want you for myself. All of you. Your kindness, your warmth, your crazy bedhead, your stupid, silly grin whenever you won a game against me. I want everything, and I need you to feel the same way, to need me as much as I need you.”
“Haechannie, I—”
“Listen, Noona.” His voice sounded both pained and desperate. “I know you don’t feel the same way, you don’t have to tell me that but I just—I want to be selfish, even more than I already am, and let you know just how much I want to be with you,” his other hand traced along the dip of her spine, “and hold you,” the fingers that were cupping her cheek were now holding her by the chin, his thumb running along her lower lip, “and kiss you…”
She unconsciously parted her lips, perhaps putting her best effort to find her words but failed every time and the temptation that he felt to replace his finger with his own lips on her was too overwhelming so before anything went wrong, he pulled back and loudly yelled, “Okay, cut!”
The sudden loss of his touch on her body didn’t feel as disheartening to him as the look he saw on her face, and maybe the way the moonlight shone across her features was playing tricks on him, because she seemed… disappointed that he stopped.
Maybe she just got carried away with the moment. Or maybe she could tell that he was being honest the whole time, knowing that it was an actual confession rather than another crazy antic of his. And maybe she was about to give him the chance, to actually look at him in the same way he looked at her, to feel the way he felt about her, and…
And he ruined the moment.
“N-Noona?” He started when she fell quiet, hiding her eyes behind her bangs. “Are you—”
“It’s getting late,” she suddenly mentioned, bending down to grab his varsity jacket from the sandy ground and harshly pushed it toward him. “Let’s get back to the cottage. We need to catch some sleep.” And as she walked off, not glancing back to see whether he was following or not, Donghyuck noticed how red her face was even when there wasn’t enough lighting around them.
As a bystander in this memory, eighteen-year-old Lee Donghyuck felt a hollow forming inside his chest, swallowing his presence one-by-one until he ceased to exist because as he relived the situation for the second time in his life, he knew how badly he had screwed everything up. He had turned his honest confession into another teasing joke because he just wasn’t brave enough to take the risks—to tell her his actual feelings in fear of ruining the bond that they already had. He saw the look on her face vividly this time, and it wasn’t pure rejection. He had a hope, she was about to give in, and he lost his chance.
And now, as she fell harder for the stranger she met in her dreams, Donghyuck was nothing but a memory—one that she’d bury at the back of her mind, one that she’d pretend to never have existed in her life.
“You’re a fucking idiot, Hyuck,” he muttered under his breath before he blinked himself awake.
***
“Haechannie! Are you up yet?”
Donghyuck could hear a clanking sound on his window, perhaps from small rocks hitting the glass. Rubbing the headache away from the back of his head, he stepped down from the bed, taking heavy steps to greet the person standing on the other side of the window.
“Morning, sleepyhead,” his neighbor chirped with an excited smile, leaning half of her body forward, crossing over her window frame. He noticed how her eyes took a quick detour on his body, as he was not wearing any shirt, but she tried to act nonchalant about it. “A lady is gracing you with her presence, so get dressed.”
Usually, he would’ve said something flirty along the line of “But isn’t this how I always look like in your dreams?” But this time, he kept himself quiet, only sighing to himself as if he had troubles that he couldn’t talk about.
And she noticed. She always did. “Are you okay?”
“Just had a bad dream.” He shrugged, feeling sleepier than before he went to bed.
“I’m guessing, you haven’t met your soulmate yet?”
He hesitated. “Well, I saw you.”
She blinked, a bit startled, but she promptly laughed it off. “Right, must have sucked then. You were waiting for a pretty stranger and I popped out instead. Sorry about that.”
He tapped his fingers against the railing, somewhat agitatedly and impatient. “Noona, about last night when we accidentally kissed. Did it… make you feel something?”
He swore, she almost fell to the floor out of shock. Blood was rushing to her face, making her incoherent. “What—why—I thought we were going to pretend it didn’t happen—”
He knew it was probably a bad idea to question all this, but if he did have the chance to be with her, no matter how small it is, if she really did feel the same way, he had to know. He couldn’t make the same mistake again.
“I thought about your reaction after that kiss. I just want to know whether it made you feel something.” He was gripping the railings by then, sounding desperate, craving for her honesty. “Something about me.”
She sputtered, mouth gaping as she was rendered speechless. But before she could react any further, they both heard her mother calling her name. Donghyuck regarded it as a distraction, but to her, it was a lifesaver. Speaking in a sense of urgency, she said, “I gotta go.”
“Noona—”
“Haechannie.” The tone she was using was definite, not wanting to hear more words from him. “I think we should stop talking about it, especially when we’re a step closer to finding our soulmates.”
He frowned, feeling as if he just got impaled. “What are you—”
“I know his name now.” A weak smile appeared on her face. “I heard someone calling his name in my dream last night. That was what I was going to tell you.”
It appeared again, the hollow inside his chest, and it grew even bigger, sucking every part of him like a black hole. “So you’re going to pretend nothing happened between us?”
“Yes, because nothing happened between us,” she professed. “It was just an accident, Haechannie.” She seemed exhausted, almost as if answering his question was draining her physically. “None of us wanted that kiss to happen.”
Donghyuck glanced away, giving her the cold shoulder. “Sure. Whatever.”
She sighed, tired of his behavior. “Look, maybe you’re just confused because of everything that happened last night, what with us spending time alone holding hands, me giving you that locket with those words—maybe we crossed the line and I apologize for that since half of it was my fault. But whatever it is that you think is happening between us will disappear the second you meet your soulmate in your dream,” she claimed, using a tone like how a mother would console her crying child. “I don’t ever want to be apart from you but if being with me makes you feel awkward and uncomfortable, maybe it’s best if we keep our distance for now?”
He gaped, his heart almost leaping out of his chest. “No! That’s not what—”
Her mother’s voice rang through the air again, making her flinch. “Look, I really gotta go,” she softly said with a timid smile. “We’ll talk later?”
And before he could answer, she already stepped away from her window. She didn’t look back until she had her fingers curving against her doorknob. “Oh, and umm,” she paused, looking unsure before she looked sideways. “His name is Mark Lee, my soulmate. Just thought you should know.”
And she left, trampling on his heart with every step she took.
***
There was an invisible wall between them, and no matter how hard Donghyuck tried to tear it apart, it wouldn’t budge so instead of fixing things, he decided to give her the time and space she needed.
Because what else could he have done? She had already rejected him before he could even confess properly—or for real, this time around. It was as if she was scared to give in to her feelings, which made him feel even more confident that she had felt something for him. She was just too lost in this whole soulmate concept that it blinded her entirely, while he, on the other hand, had begun to stop believing in it and dwell himself deeper in reality rather than his dreams.
But when one of his bandmates, Lee Jeno, announced that his cousin was going to come in to temporarily fill the position of lead guitar player in their band, Donghyuck had no other choice but to believe that fate did take part in connecting a red thread from one lover to another. Because, standing in a pair of jeans and a black shirt with his eyes half-covered by his white snapback, was Mark Lee—her soulmate.
Donghyuck could tell that he was the same Mark Lee she mentioned because he had seen her drawings of him. It had taken her weeks before she could finish his sketch, drawing him solely based on the memories she had witnessed in her dreams and though it wasn’t a hundred percent accurate, she did manage to sketch his distinct features—his prominent cheekbones, his thin, curvy lips, his wide, doe eyes.
The sight of him, standing just two meters away from him, sent chills down his spine.
“Hey guys,” Mark said, giving them a tentative smile. Even his awkwardness looked exactly the way she described him to be.
“This is Lee Donghyuck, our vocalist.” Jeno introduced him, “He’s an ass and you’ll probably get into a fight with him sooner or later—we all did—but after that, he’ll get all clingy to you. Just a heads up so you won’t be surprised and end up leaving the band before the gig.”
Mark laughed at that, friendly and warm, and it set Donghyuck’s heart ablaze for an entirely different reason. It was the first time he met him and yet he already despised everything that he was.
“It’s weird,” Mark said, offering his hand for a handshake. “I thought your friends call you Haechan too.”
Donghyuck froze, almost losing his grip on his phone. “What?”
Mark blinked, the realization hit him like a wave when he looked around, noticing everyone looking at him with furrowed eyebrows and questioning eyes. “Oh, I mean,” he panicked, “I-it’s nothing. I was just talking to myself. I’m weird that way.”
“Don’t worry, bud,” Jeno said, picking up his bass. “We’re all a bunch of freaks here. That’s why we get along.”
Mark smiled but seemed more like a grimace. He turned toward Donghyuck again. “Sorry about that. Nice to meet you, Lee Donghyuck. I hope we can be friends.”
Donghyuck took his hand but wished for the exact opposite.
***
“Do you have some time to spare, Donghyuck-ah?”
Donghyuck already knew who it was without having to glance up from his phone screen. It wasn’t because Mark’s voice was distinct to his ears, it was simply because his voice and the way he said his name as if they were best friends irked him so much.
“No,” Donghyuck answered, tapping his thumbs rapidly to earn another high score on the game he was playing. He was squatting down on the ground with his shoulders slouched forward. They just finished having their third band practice in the same studio that week, and although he was drained to his boots, Jeno kept insisting to have another practice so they wouldn’t embarrass the shit out of themselves when they performed as the opening act at prom.
Mark laid his guitar case against the wall before he took a seat next to him in the alley that stood behind their music studio. “Well, you look like you do, so I’m just gonna sit here and ask you something.”
Donghyuck scoffed. “You’re actually pretty annoying, aren’t you?”
“I’m sorry. I know you don’t like me—”
“I dislike people in general, so don’t consider yourself special.”
Mark seemed amused at his words which pissed him off even more. “I know we just met for a few days and it’s probably better for me to leave you alone—”
“And yet, here you are, talking to me when I’m trying to finish this fucking game.” He moved his thumbs more frantically than before, making Mark worry that he was going to break his phone screen, and stopped when the game ended with him winning second place. “Look what you’ve done. Happy now?”
“I thought that was a pretty high score.”
“That was the lowest score I’ve ever achieved in my life.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Just fuck off, Mark.” Even when his tone sounded final, Mark did not budge.
“I promise I’ll leave you alone after this, but I just really need to ask something first,” he said, slightly forcing the other man to look at him by placing an arm on his shoulder. “I see you a lot in my dreams.”
Donghyuck knew exactly what he meant, but he wasn’t going to dwell himself in it. “Sorry, dude,” he uttered, slapping his hand away. “I’m not gay.”
“No. That’s not what I meant.” Mark had the bravery to laugh about it. “You’ve heard about the soulmate dream, right? How you could see your soulmate’s memories—”
“Yeah, I’ve heard about it and I’m also not interested.” He stood up, tucking his phone back to the pocket of his jeans, and leaned sideways to grab his backpack. “I’m leaving.”
“Please.” Mark stopped him by wrapping his thin fingers along his wrist. “Please help me. By your reaction, I know she’s told you about me and I want to find her—I need to find her. I just don’t know where to start. I don’t even know her name.”
“Well, it’s not my fucking problem, is it?” Donghyuck harshly pulled his wrist away, stomping his feet on the pavement, away from the other man.
Mark stood up, desperation sounding thick in his voice. “Can’t we just—Donghyuck-ah!”
“Fuck off, Mark.”
“You love her, don’t you?”
That stopped him in his tracks, making him turn on his heels, hissing, “Excuse me?”
Mark fidgeted slightly, swallowing his breath. “You’re acting this way because you love her. More than a friend. That’s why you don’t want to help me.”
He had earned his whole attention now. “The reason why I’m not helping you is simply because you’re a fucking stranger who’s looking for ways to get into my best friend’s pants.”
“I’m not—” Mark blushed. “Listen, I’m just trying to find my soulmate. I know she’s looking for me too. I’ve seen her memories. I’ve seen you spending a lot of time with her too. I won’t be surprised if you end up having feelings for her—”
Donghyuck almost bared his teeth. “Shut up.”
“But she’s not your soulmate, so—“
“Shut the fuck up!” It happened so fast for Mark’s eyes to catch, but the next thing he knew, Donghyuck’s fingers were fisting the collar of his shirt, slamming his body against the wall and Mark groaned lowly, feeling pain spreading like wildfire from the back of his skull.
“You don’t know anything about me, Mark Lee.” The way Donghyuck spat out his name was laced with nothing but venom. “And don’t you dare talk to me about this soulmate bullshit. Falling in love with a complete stranger just because you saw her in your dreams? Do you know how fucking ridiculous you sound in my head?”
Still wincing from the pain, he replied, “I saw the way you looked at her.”
“I don’t fucking care,” Donghyuck snarled, tightening his grip around the fabric of his shirt. “And if I were you, I would just fuck off and try my luck finding her somewhere else because I’m not gonna tell you anything. Do we have that clear?”
Mark didn’t say a word in response, but his eyes were locked into his. Donghyuck could see how they didn’t waver in the slightest, and the way Mark’s fingernails were sinking deep into his wrist let him know that this man could hold his own battle if needed.
Donghyuck released his hold with a hard shove, and Mark didn’t blink an eye even after knowing his strength.
“Just so you know,” Mark said, when Donghyuck began to step away, slinging his backpack to one of his shoulders. “She would’ve done the opposite for you. She would’ve helped you find your soulmate. But I guess, you already know that.”
Donghyuck stomped off, kicking a trash can on his way out until it toppled over to the ground.
***
Their next band practice was filled with nothing but severe tension between him and Mark, and Jeno had to sigh in exasperation every time one of them made a mistake and blamed the other for it.
“The two of you,” he said, scowling at the two boys who were still trying to murder each other with their glares. “Just go home. Now.”
And unlike Mark, Donghyuck didn’t hesitate—didn’t even try to reason. He just snatched his backpack and walked out the door, slamming his shoulder against Mark’s on his way out.
Jeno grimaced, probably imagining the trouble Mark had to bear while seeing him rubbing off the pain. “Remember when I told you he’s an ass?”
Mark timidly smiled. “Yeah.”
Donghyuck walked home with a sore throat and sweaty bangs. He was no longer as furious as before, but he had to make sure to push every thought of Mark away from his head if he wanted to spend the rest of his evening in peace. He was beyond exhausted and in desperate need of a good, warm shower. He glanced at the house he grew to be more familiar than his own, feeling disappointed that she wasn’t sitting on her porch, waiting for his arrival like usual though she would never admit that out loud.
Well, he should’ve seen that coming. After what happened that morning, he would’ve avoided him too if he was her. But almost a week had passed and they had no interaction, not even meeting each other by coincidence. And although she seemed fine with it, Donghyuck felt more than miserable.
God, if only I can stop missing her so much…
But he couldn’t, so he broke through her fence, and turned over the doorknob of her front door. “Auntie? It’s me. I’m coming in.”
The clicking sounds of footsteps meeting vinyl flooring had him excited in anticipation of her face and the shy, awkward smile she always threw whenever they had arguments a few moments before. But the one who greeted him was her mother, grinning widely at the sight of him as she wiped her hands on her apron.
“Ah, Hyuckie,” she squealed. “Glad you’re here, I was just making dinner. Wanna join us?”
“Oh, no thanks. I just ate something on the way back. Is she here?”
“She said she was heading to the park to draw something. It was hours ago, though. I’m also wondering why she hasn’t come home yet.”
“I see…” There was a knot in his stomach again, making him feel uneasy but he beamed at her again. “Well, I think she’ll be back soon but I’ll go search for her, just in case.”
She pressed a hand against her heart. “Aaw. Always being her knight in shining armor. She’s so lucky to have you.”
He blushed but covered it with a peal of bashful laughter. Saying his goodbye, he turned around to take his leave but she stopped him with a call of his name. “Yeah, auntie?”
“Have you heard…” She hesitated. “Have you heard about her soulmate?”
Donghyuck curled his fingers. “A little.”
Her eyes gleamed in sadness and, as much as Donghyuck hated to see it, sympathy. “Are you okay, Hyuckie? With all of this?”
Thunder roared inside his chest, making him stand still. “What—of course, I’m fine. I’m glad she’s having these dreams. She’ll probably gonna see him soon.”
And Donghyuck never pegged himself as an actor, but seeing how she gradually picked up her motherly smile back on her face and no longer staring at him as if one of his family members just died in such a tragic way, maybe he had a natural talent in lying about his emotions.
“I’m so glad you’re taking this well. I guess I’m not as sharp as I used to be.” She chuckled to herself, a bit diffident. “To tell you the truth, I was rooting for you to be her soulmate. You guys just look so adorable together, but maybe it’s weird for you since you probably think of her as a sister or something.”
“That’s right.” There was a crack in his voice, but he hastily covered it with another smile. “A sister.”
“Which turns out to be a good thing. Because if you love her that way but she’s not your soulmate then it’s going to be hard on both of you.”
“What? What do you mean?”
“You see, finding a soulmate is a rare, wonderful thing that can only occur once in a lifetime. It’s a sign from fate, and if you ignore that sign, if you don’t accept who your soulmate is and be with someone else, something bad will happen, either to yourself or to your relationship.”
“Something bad like what?”
“I don’t know, it just usually doesn’t work out.” She frowned a little bit, noticing how he seemed unusually invested with the topic. “It’s just a rumor, though, darling. So just take any of this with a grain of salt. No one can prove whether it’s true or false.”
“Of course, yeah.” He shook his head, taking control of himself. “Well, thanks anyway. I gotta go.”
“Take care, Hyuckie. And let me know when you start dreaming about your soulmate! I want to know who the lucky girl is!”
He waved a hand, replying to her with a smile but not promising anything.
***
It was already nightfall when he came to his senses, and he hadn’t found her no matter how many steps had he taken in the search of her presence. He had visited the park she often went to in her spare time, the garden near their houses, even the cafe where she once grew fond of. And yet, she was nowhere to be found.
He had tried to call her several times but they were always directed to her voicemails, and he grew even more anxious with more time passing by, worried sick of her well-being.
So when she finally walked past his house, carrying her sketchbook in her arms and a dazed smile on her face, Donghyuck nearly screamed.
“Where the hell have you been?!” He shouted, jumping off his porch and ran to her spot. She was startled, her entire body shaking by the sound of his voice. Her sketchbook slipped from her hands, meeting the cold hard ground that was slightly damp from the drizzle.
“You scared me,” she said, her hand going to her chest. “I was just from the park—“
“I was from the park and you weren’t there!” His eyes were scanning her profile, making sure she was fine. “Where have you been? Do you know how late it is?”
She frowned. “Why do you sound like my mother?”
“I’m not—” Donghyuck exhaled loudly through his nose, trying to collect himself. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
“Well, I’m fine, so you can stop acting so weird.” She bent down to pick up her sketchbook, but he was faster. “Thanks.” She awkwardly smiled when he handed it to her, noticing how his fingertips brushed hers ever so slightly. “Have you been looking for me all this time? I thought you were avoiding me.”
“I thought you were avoiding me.”
There were a good few seconds of silence where they just gazed deep into each other’s eyes before they began to quietly laugh, exchanging sheepish smiles with knowing eyes. “I guess we avoided each other for nothing then,” she said, holding out her hand. “Are we okay? With everything?”
Donghyuck’s eyes were soft and longing as they peered into hers. He took her hand and pulled her forward until she landed on his chest, embracing her tightly with both arms. “We’re okay.”
“Good,” she lightly murmured, placing her chin on his shoulder as she tiptoed to match his height. “Because I’ve missed you, Haechannie. You and your whole stupid antics.”
It still felt awkward for him, and maybe for her too, to suddenly ignore their heated debate about the kiss they shared and the feelings they had for each other. And maybe they would fight about it again in the future, probably with him starting the fire the second he lost control of his emotions again. But he wanted to forget all of that for now, just for tonight, so he could focus on how perfect she felt in his arms, how both overwhelmingly intoxicating and comforting her scent was, and how nice it was to hear his name falling down her lips.
“I’ve missed you too, Noona,” he whispered. “You could’ve at least texted me where you were. I was worried sick about you.”
“Okay, that was what I was going to tell you.” She pulled away slightly so she could look at him with a pair of animated eyes. “I just went on a date.”
“A… date?” He shivered. “With who?”
“With Mark Lee.” Her cheeks turned rosy with her smile nearly splitting her face in half. “My soulmate.”
Donghyuck gaped, a spark of electricity running through his veins. “H-how?” He swallowed hard.
“A funny story, actually.” She shyly rubbed her nose. “I was trying to draw that pine tree near the pond—the one where we used to carve our names on—and I saw him passing by with his guitar case strapped to his back and a camera in his hand—just like the first time I saw him in my dream. And he saw me through his camera lens and then we were just staring at each other with our mouth wide-open, like can you believe it? It just happened out of nowhere. He noticed me at the same time I noticed him so he must have been seeing me in his dreams too.”
With more words falling from her lips, Donghyuck’s heart raced even faster. It was the first time in his life he ever felt terrified down to his soul. He felt weak, powerless and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t find a way to win against fate. He didn’t know how to defy his destiny.
Though she was an arm’s reach away, it felt like they existed in different universes.
***
It’s hard to pretend to be fine when deep down inside, you feel like drowning and Donghyuck knew how that felt first hand. She regularly came by to his room to say hello but she never laid herself down on his bed. She never touched his arms when she laughed. She no longer pressed her cheek against his shoulder when she felt sleepy. He could tell that she was trying to respect his feelings, not wanting to lead him further ever since that accidental kiss happened. She was trying to be cautious, to draw lines between them, so he’d know his boundaries and stay still on his place, and continue to regard her as nothing but a friend.
It was torture.
They no longer spent their nights together, with her making excuses about studying for her final tests and her college entrance exams. And Donghyuck didn’t mind, though his heart craved desperately for her attention because he couldn’t properly breathe whenever she was around. He felt like he was transforming into someone else, almost like a robot, that only smiled when she smiled and responded with words as little as necessary.
He continued seeing her in his dreams every night, and only then could he truly feel joy. Only then he could have the time to look at her face as long as he wanted. Only then he could hear her calling his name without inflicting some kind of pain in his chest. But even then, he still couldn’t touch her. Even then, she was still out of reach.
She was moving out of town before long, preparing herself to settle at her dorm before she started her first year in college.
“Hey,” Donghyuck softly called, as he leaned against her doorframe, watching her finish packing what was left in her room. It was unfamiliar, he thought, the sight of her room now that her novels were packed in boxes, her clothes were no longer hanging inside her closet, the posters of her favorite idols folded and unseen. It was only her scent that somehow still linger faintly in the air that seemed recognizable to him.
“Hi.” She smiled back, her shoulders going down in relief at the sight of him smiling sheepishly with his eyes peeking from under his bangs. “I was beginning to think that you wouldn’t come to say goodbye.”
“Of course, I would. I’m your best friend, aren’t I?”
“Well, I haven’t seen you in a while.” The way she said it, almost heartbrokenly, made his smile falter from his face.
“Yeah, sorry, I was…” He scratched his cheek. “Busy.”
She took a good look at him, not saying anything and it made him feel queasy. “I saw you on stage during your graduation,” he said, changing the topic. “You looked beautiful.”
“Why didn’t you come to say hi? I was looking for you.”
You did? “You seem occupied with your friends and family. I didn’t want to bother you.”
“Haechannie,” she sighed and he wondered what kind of mistake did he make with his words. “You’ll never bother me. I mean, yes, you bother me a lot as in you annoy the hell out of me but you never bother me with your presence. I missed you on that day. I’ve been missing you for the whole week. And I still kinda miss you now.”
He grew weak. “I miss you too.”
“Why do we keep saying these things when we literally live next to each other?” She chuckled but it sounded dry before she gave in to the silence again. “Are things… okay between us?”
He tried not to flinch. “Were things not okay between us before?”
“I don’t know, you were acting a bit weird after…” She knew the words, she just wasn’t sure whether it was wise for her to say them. “Well, after everything that happened. I just wasn’t sure how to approach you.”
“Yeah, sorry about that. I guess there were just a lot of things running through my mind at the same time.” He brought his head down, looking at his feet. “I’m okay now, though. And I hope we can go back to how we were.”
“Of course, Haechannie.” She stood up, opening her arms to him and he answered immediately, half-running to her spot before he circled his arms around her waist, pulling her close. She sighed the second their skins make contact with each other, exhaling in relief. “Please don’t ever give me the cold shoulder again. I can’t stand it.”
“Okay, okay.” He almost let his lips graze her temple as he spoke. Almost. “Do you want to go somewhere, just the two of us? You’re not leaving until tomorrow, right?”
“I won’t be leaving until next year if that’s what you want me to do.” She grinned childishly. “So take me away, Haechannie. I’m all yours.”
And although he mirrored her grin, his heart was shattering one piece at a time because he knew she only meant her last line as a fleeting joke, and yet he wanted it to become a promise made solely for him.
They tried to catch up as much as they could during dinner in the cafe that she loved so much. He hated the taste of their food—everything somehow felt either too sweet or too sour on his tongue—but he never mentioned it to her, not wanting to erase her happy grin whenever she took a spoonful of gelato into her mouth. Their conversations didn’t go as awkward as he had imagined, but it ended up with her asking more questions and with him only nodding or shaking his head in response. He tried to cover it up with smiles or waves of laughter, and noticing how she hadn’t complained about it so far, maybe he did a pretty good job of masking his feelings.
“It feels so good to have you back,” she said, hands buried deep in the pocket of her coat as she blew hot air into the cold weather, watching puffs of air forming in front of her lips.
They were walking back to their houses, matching their steps with one another with their voices being the only ones that could be heard within the neighborhood. It was late, and she knew she really should have gone to catch some sleep to wake up early on the next day but Donghyuck’s voice in her ears was soothing, making her long to hear more of it, especially when she knew, she wouldn’t be able to hear it again in a while.
Donghyuck sank half of his face behind his scarf. “I never left you, though.”
“Liar. You totally avoided me this whole time.”
“Well, what am I supposed to do? You kissed me and pretended it didn’t mean shit.”
“I kissed you?!” She gasped, blushing as she stopped in her tracks. “It was an accident!”
Donghyuck turned around, facing her. “It was still a kiss, nonetheless.”
They were walking on a thin rope. He knew it was a sensitive topic, and she also knew that it was best for them to avoid it but she was leaving on the next day and she couldn’t help but feel that he was still holding secrets from her. It was time for her to face this once and for all, so they could go back to the way they were before it was too late.
“What exactly do you want me to do about it?” She nervously asked, but tried to keep her voice steady. “I can’t exactly turn back time.”
Donghyuck’s eyes glinted mysteriously under the dim lighting of the streetlight. “You really want to have this conversation after what happened to us last time?”
“It’s not like you’re giving me any options. I just want us to be like how we used to, not with you acting all awkward and agreeing to every word I said.”
“So you noticed? I thought I was putting a good act.”
“Haechannie.” It was almost like a plead, the way she said his name. “I’m tired of seeing you like this. Like you’re in pain and I’m the one who caused it. So if you have anything to say, say it right now. What are you so upset about, exactly?”
He took his time contemplating, he really did, but he hadn’t finished thinking everything through before his emotions took control over him again, making him blurt out, “I don’t know, I guess I’m just pissed because you seem fine the next day after that kiss happened and I’m over here losing sleep still trying to sort out my goddamn feelings for you.” There was a pause, as he tried to catch his breath, but before she could form a response, he questioned, “Do you ever feel something for me, Noona?”
She swallowed. “I don’t know, I’m—”
“Be honest.”
Another pause, where silence struck like a hurricane. “Maybe I did have feelings for you in the past,” she finally admitted and his eyes gleamed in both joy and anticipation, “But even then, I wasn’t sure because we grew up together, Haechannie. We slept on the same bed, we even took baths together. I wasn’t sure of how I felt because I never had this kind of relationship with anyone before.” She sighed, rubbing the side of her temple. “And with you constantly making me confused on whether you had feelings for me or not also didn’t make this any easier for me.”
“What about now?” It was the question that mattered the most to him. “How do you feel about me now?”
“Haechannie—”
“No, listen to me.” He stepped forward, wrapping his lean fingers along her wrist. “Remember that time on the beach when you dared me to be romantic and I told you I loved you? I think you know by now that I wasn’t pretending that night—”
She averted her gaze, trying to pull her hand away. “Please stop—”
“Noona.” He cupped her cheeks with both hands, lifted her face so she could only look at him. “I still feel the same way about you. It never changed, no matter how hard I tried to ignore it because I cared about our friendship as much as you do, but—”
“Stop.” Lying a hand on his chest, she tried to push him away. “It isn’t right. You’re not my soulmate, we shouldn’t do this—”
“I don’t care about your fucking soulmate!”
The sudden roar that erupted from his mouth was echoing loud in her ears, making her freeze on her feet, with her hands shivering against his chest. She looked frightened and it tore him to pieces. Cursing under his breath, he stepped away, his skin no longer making contact with hers.
“I just…” He started and failed instantly, wanting to caress her cheek, embrace her to soothe her down but was too scared of startling her again. “What I want to say is that I care about us. I care about you more than I have ever cared about anyone else in my life.”
“I care about you too, Haechannie.” There was a quiver in her voice as if she was on the verge of crying. “I care so much about you.”
“Why does it feel to me like you’re about to contradict your own words?” There was no answer and the tension was so thick, it felt like he was suffocating. “I saw your reaction at that time when we were at the beach. I know how you wished parts of my confession were true and I’m telling you that all of it was—I meant every word I said that night.”
“Stop—”
“I love you, Noona,” he immediately said, before she took his chance in answering. “I really do, now more than ever. So if you still have feelings for me, please—”
“I don’t.”
Donghyuck’s jaw fell slacked on his face. “What?”
“I’m sorry, Haechannie. I’m sorry for leading you on, but I don’t. I don’t feel the same way.” She was looking everywhere but his eyes, her voice was clouded with emotions, becoming unclear as seconds went by. “I care about you and I do love you but only as a brother and a friend. I can’t give you more than that.”
He stood still in silence, clenching his jaws. “Can’t or won’t?”
“It doesn’t matter.” She shook her head frantically. “Look, we have soulmates for a reason. Even if we both give in and accept our feelings, what if it doesn’t work out?”
“I don’t care, I’m willing to try.”
“Well, I’m not. I care about our friendship too much. I don’t want anything to ruin what we have now. Especially after I meet my soulmate and you meet yours.”
Donghyuck could feel himself slowly withering away. “So you just want us to go back to how we were? After this?”
“Yes.” He didn’t have to see her to know she was spilling tears from her eyes. It was already spoken clear in her voice. “I-if that’s okay with you.”
And if he was much more mature, maybe he would’ve been able to let everything go. Maybe he would’ve been able to step forward and twist his fingers around the strands of her hair, cradling her gently in his arms and whisper, “Of course. I’ll always be here for you.” But that wouldn’t be him. And he was so tired of being someone else this whole time, trying to hide how he really felt for her.
So, underneath the darkness and the silence of the space that was hanging between them, he told her, “No, I don’t think we can go back to how we were.” And even as he watched her cry, covering the sobs that threatened to fall from her lips with her palm, he said, “I’m sick of pretending, Noona. So if I can’t have you that way, I don’t think I can be your friend and do nothing but sit there, watching you slip away into another man’s arms. I’m not as good of a person as you think I am. And as long as we’re both selfish with what we want—with you wanting to keep our friendship together and with me wanting you that way—this is as close as we can get.”
“What—” Her shoulders were shaking with every breath she took. “Why does it have to come to this—I—”
“Make your decision now.” His voice was loud and clear, making him surprised by how steady he sounded despite all the storms swirling in his chest. “Be with me or push me away. Your choice.”
Tears were spilling down her cheeks as her eyes grew wide, staring at him with parted lips but only whimpers could be heard. He knew how ruthless he was being, and he felt sorry for making her stand in this position.
So, with a heavy heart, he walked away.
***
Days passed by in silence, and they turned to weeks, and months, and when he finally had the bravery to reply to her words with sentences longer than, “I’m doing fine,” and “Sorry for the late response, I had things to do.” It was already several months after his graduation and he was moving out of the place he called home into his dormitory that stood hundreds of kilometers away from her place.
He was nineteen and she was twenty, and he had never loved anyone else while she was tangled deep in her lover’s arms.
And it was maybe his fault because he was the one who pushed her away. She’d asked him to take a day off college so they could fly back to their hometown and celebrate his birthday together but he declined, making random excuses that sounded like a train of lies to her ears but she took notice of his tone and forced out a laugh.
“Then maybe I’ll see you when my birthday comes up?”
“Sure.” But it wasn’t a promise. He thanked her for the present she gave him but ending his call shortly before she even asked about his day.
He sent her a birthday present—a book that she once loved to read as a child, but was thrown away by her mother by accident—and he received five missed calls from her and nine different texts, begging him to answer her calls but Donghyuck was busy burying his fingers deep inside his locks and yanking at the roots with one hand, and rubbing the unspilled tears from his eyes with his other one as he sat on the edge of his bed, swallowed by the darkness of his room.
And he began to fear the night when exhaustion would consume every part of his body and invisible hands began to press his eyelids down until he fell asleep and woke up in her memories. It was painful enough for him to not be able to see himself as often as he used to, and it was torture when Jaemin began to take his place, forcing Donghyuck to stand in the background and watch as he planted his lips on the pair that should’ve belonged to him. He had to hear her gasp Jaemin’s name between kisses, had to see her card her fingers through his sandy blonde hair, had to see her watching him with dazed eyes and swollen lips.
Donghyuck always willed himself to wake up and he found himself breathing hard when he did.
That night, another memory occurred and it was when she shared her first kiss with Mark. They were at her dorm, her roommate was away and she pulled him by the hand to walk deeper into her room. Mark seemed awkward, like how he always did, scanning the room and gulping as he noticed how the entire place smelled pleasantly like her.
“Coffee?” She offered, and he nodded. Taking a seat at the side of her bed, he played with his fingers, trying to hide the quiver that sparked in his fingertips. She joined him soon after with two cups of hot coffee on her hands, which he took with a grateful smile.
“Why do you look so nervous?” She questioned between small, shy giggles that wrenched Donghyuck’s heart from how much he missed hearing them.
“I’m not—it’s just—” Mark gulped, tapping his fingers anxiously against the cup. “It’s my first time being in a girl’s room.”
“Haven’t you dated anyone before?”
“I went on a few dates but nothing serious happened. And when I started seeing you in my dreams, I just stopped dating entirely.”
She was about to take a sip of her coffee but stopped mid-air, eyes unblinking. “You were waiting for me?”
He bashfully smiled. “M-maybe…”
Her eyes drooped down, a faint blush smearing her cheeks. She placed her cup down on her nightstand before she turned toward him again and pressed a gentle kiss on his cheek.
“What—” He sputtered, holding the side of his face, his round eyes turning even wider. “What was that for?”
But she didn’t reply. Instead, she leaned in for another kiss, and this time, he answered with his lips instead.
Donghyuck woke up with a pain in his chest, and he felt so sick, so disturbed, that he began to jump down his bed, startling his roommate who was deep in slumber. He snatched his jacket from the floor and closed the door behind him with a small thud. He needed to distract himself so he burst into the night air, not caring if the cold made his teeth chatter behind his lips.
***
His dreams, they became nightmares. And they didn’t stop even when he woke up. He was losing sleep and had the hardest time concentrating on everything. He was putting his best effort to move on, to forget about her existence entirely and he had been successfully avoiding her calls or her pleads to meet up every time a long holiday came up. But how could he forget about her when she kept showing up in his dreams, making him feel jealous, feel pained, with no way of stopping it?
It was a week before his birthday when his mother begged him to come home and celebrate it together with his whole family. Though he was reluctant to go, worrying that he’d probably see her on his way back, he eventually agreed to his mother’s wish. If they ended up meeting each other, maybe it was a sign for him to tell her about these dreams he’d been having of her and see how it would go from there.
It was raining, the third day he spent lounging on the bed in his room. It looked just about the same, but with fewer things and thicker specks of dust. And he kept his curtain closed, not wanting to look at the other side of his window.
A sudden ring of his iPhone sent jolts to his entire body.
It was from an unknown number. He usually wouldn’t respond to it, but there was something in his chest that told him to answer no matter what excuses he came up with.
He slid his thumb along the screen and pressed the phone to his ear, but he did not say a word, waiting for the other person to ignite the conversation.
“Haechannie. It’s me.”
He had a hunch who it was, but hearing the sound of her voice so close to his ear still almost sent him falling to his knees. The words I miss you, I’m sorry I’ve been trying to push you away, but I can’t pretend anymore, I miss you, I miss you so much, I’m going insane threatened to fall from his lips so he kept his mouth shut, not believing in himself just yet.
“I could tell how you wouldn’t pick up if you knew it was me, so I’m using a new number.”
“It’s…” He licked his lips, trying to tame his racing heart. “It’s been a while, Noona.”
“Don’t say that when you’ve been avoiding me for years, Lee Donghyuck. I know you’re home so let me in. It’s pouring outside.”
His grip tightened around his phone. “You’re… here?”
“Yes, idiot. Your mom told me last night that you��re here so I flew back the first thing in the morning to meet you. If you make one more excuse of not wanting to see me, I will literally climb up your wall and kick your window open myself, I swear to God.”
Donghyuck would’ve laughed because it was so her to say things like that whenever she got angry, but he was so overwhelmed with the thoughts of seeing her in person that he tripped over his own feet before he ran down the stairs.
The second he opened the front door and saw her standing on his porch, with her hair a little wet from the rain, all the air nearly left his lungs. She was still wearing her trench coat, a scarf around her neck with her suitcase stood idly next to her. He noticed that she must have returned straight back from the airport, not even spending a second resting in her own house when it was only a few steps away from where she stood.
“Can I come in?” She asked, trembling slightly from the cold. There was a huge urge to embrace her that he almost couldn’t control, to share his warmth and steal all the shivers away from her body. But he swallowed all of his feelings with a hard gulp, and stepped back to let her in with a small nod.
She closed the front door behind her, pressing her spine against it and they both waited in the silence of his house, expecting the other to strike a conversation but neither of them had the bravery to find a word. The ticking sound of the grandmother’s clock in his guest room was loud, matching the thundering sound of his heartbeat.
“Where are your family?” She eventually uttered, peeking at him from behind her bangs.
“Visiting my cousins outside of town.”
“Why didn’t you go with them?”
“Just didn’t feel like going so I told them I was sick.”
“I see…”
And silence struck again. It was so tense, the awkwardness between them and it was beginning to suffocate him. “Noona, I think—”
“Can I hug you?” She spoke in such a quiet voice, but it sent powerful vibrations down his spine. He was busy gawking at her, not sure how to respond and it didn’t matter, because she already took a few steps toward him, wrapping her arms around his neck and sinking her face deep into the crook of his neck.
Donghyuck let out a shaky breath, his arms still dangling weakly on his sides.
“Seems like you’ve lost some weight,” she spoke in whispers, her breath felt like fire on his skin. “Have you been eating well?”
It was hard trying to focus on her voice when the sound of his heart clamoring inside his ribcages was deafening in his ears. He only hummed in response, moving his hands slightly until they rested on the sides of her waist, tense and awkward.
“I really,” she breathed, her voice quivering. “Really miss you, Haechannie.”
It was all too much for him to bear, too many flashbacks, uncontrolled feelings, and hidden emotions washed over him at the same time, making him feel dizzy and emotive. So instead, he focused on what mattered the most. “You’re shivering. We should get you changed.” And he pulled away before she could reply. Noticing how the loss of their warmth on each other’s skin was as painful for her as it was to him, he offered his hand with a timid smile, which she immediately laced together with hers.
He guided her to his room and released her hand to rummage the inside of his closet, trying to find that particular sweater of his that she grew to be fond of. She slid open his curtain to brighten the room though it didn’t do much because the clouds were dark and thick, pouring heavy rain to the earth.
“Here,” he said, handing her his navy blue knitted sweater. “I’ll go outside so you can change.”
She grabbed him by his wrist before he stepped aside. “No, it’s fine, just—” She cleared her throat, didn’t dare to look him in the eyes. “Just turn around for a little bit.”
The old Donghyuck would’ve had a blast teasing her about this, so when he simply turned around, bringing his head down to stare at his feet while scratching his nape from being both shy and awkward, the feeling of loneliness began to consume her heart.
She was losing him. He wasn’t the person she remembered him to be.
“I’m done,” she called when she had finished changing her damp blouse into his sweater. The fabric fell loose around her body, its hem reaching to the middle part of her jean-clad thighs. “You can turn around now.”
Donghyuck slowly turned on his heels, but his eyes were looking everywhere but hers because he knew, once he saw her again wearing his clothing around her body like a lover would, he would lose his common sense.
“It feels familiar, doesn’t it?” She lightly laughed, trying to keep it casual but it felt strained. “I mean, us spending time in your room with me wearing your clothes.”
He tiredly smiled, leaning against the wall. “Yeah.”
“How was your birthday yesterday? I’m sorry for not sending you any present, I wasn’t sure you wanted to receive one from me... Did auntie make you a cake?”
“Yeah. It wasn’t good.”
She tucked a loose strand of her hair, wetting her lips. “You always said that, but you ate all of it.”
He wanted to sneak a glance at her, wanted to be captivated by her beauty just for a split second, but noticing it was best for him to stop. Otherwise, she’d entrap him again. “Yeah… I did.”
“Haechannie.”
“Hmm?”
“Can you look at me, please?”
He tightened his jaw, taking a few seconds in silence to prepare himself before he slowly looked up, peering at her features from behind his bangs.
He had seen her sad before—multiple times, in fact—but it was never like this. She never looked this heartbroken before, and he loathed the fact that, unlike any other times where she cried over anyone else, he was now the reason for such emotion to arise.
And maybe he looked the same to her, as she instantly grew speechless, her fingers tightening around the hem of her sweater. “How… are you?” She asked, and he knew that wasn’t the question she intended to say but maybe she was afraid and uncertain whether her words would inflict more sadness to his eyes more than she already did so far.
“I’m doing well.”
“Have you made any friends at your campus?”
“A few.”
“Ah… Great, then.” She was going insane, she could feel it, and when he never tried to spark a conversation like she did, she began to lose her patience. “Why have you been avoiding me?” Her tone somehow a tad colder this time around.
Donghyuck slipped his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You ignored my calls, you rarely replied to my texts—”
“Yeah, well, I was busy—”
“Two years, Haechannie. You had two fucking years to reach out back to me, and you’re simply telling me you were busy?! If you’re going to lie, lie better!”
“Well, you already have your whole life perfect without me anyway.”
Hot tears began to well in her eyes. “Do you not… need me anymore?”
He looked away, his chest suffocating. “You should leave. Get some rest. We’ll talk la—”
“Stop it!” She cried out, forcing him to look at her in the eyes by the desperate tone in her voice. “Stop acting like this! Stop pretending like you’re not hurting when you are just as much as I am!”
His eyes gleamed in the dim lighting of the room. “Why are you even here?”
She narrowed her eyes, trying to ignore the pain that was about to erupt from her chest. “Is it so wrong for me to see you?”
“I thought we’ve both decided that it’s best if we stay away from each other.”
“You decided.” It was both sorrow and anger that painted her voice. “You decided to stay away from me. I never wanted us to be like this. I’ve been trying to reach out to you and you pushed me away every time, so don’t you dare blame this on me.”
“What do you expect me to do?” He vocalized in outrage, his voice reverberating through the air almost as heavy as the storm that poured outside. “I revealed all of my feelings out to you, asked you to make a choice and you just stood there doing fucking nothing! How do you think that made me feel?”
She stepped back, her hand on her chest. “I—” She fumbled with her words. “It was all so sudden, I didn’t know how—”
“So sudden?!” He threw his head back in exasperation. “I have been trying to tell you that for years, Noona!”
“You flirted with me for years, that didn’t count as—”
“Well, I had to pretend everything was a joke because you always looked like you were seconds away from crying, afraid of ruining our friendship and it made me think that maybe you never really liked me that way at all! I don’t even know how you feel about me now because you’re never honest even with yourself.”
“I…” She nibbled on her lower lip, scared and anxious. “I don’t know whether I—”
“Of course, you don’t,” he spat out, scoffing loudly. “You never do. That’s what I fucking hate about you. You’re such a coward. You don’t want to be with me but you keep coming back to me, making me feel things I shouldn’t, making me yearn for you again when I literally spent every second of my life trying to forget you even exist. I had to watch you slip away from my arms twice as if it wasn’t enough for you to hurt me one time—”
“I never meant to hurt you—”
“But that’s all you fucking do!” Donghyuck unintentionally slammed the side of his fist against the wall out of sheer fury, making her take a step backward, terrified. “Do you know how much you’re driving me insane from seeing you here within my grasp but not having the right to touch you in the way I want to? Just how fucking selfish can you be?!”
Tears were forming in her eyes, but he wasn’t sure whether they emerged from sadness or anger. “I’m selfish?! I’m trying to do the right thing! You know how things can go bad if we ignore the signs and deny our soulmate, so even if I agree to be with you, what if things don’t work out and we end up—”
“I’m so fucking tired of soulmates.”
Donghyuck had her body pressed against the wall, his hand on her face and his lips on hers, meeting together in a heated kiss. She closed her eyes in reflex, her fingers clutching tightly to the fabric of his shirt, gasping into his mouth when he pressed harder. Donghyuck felt like a flame, scorching every inch of her skin that was connected to his and she let herself grow weak, succumbing to the fire that was about to devour her whole.
When he let go, the tip of his nose was still grazing against hers, his fingertips holding her by the jaw, while his other hand was secured tightly around her waist.
“I’m giving you another chance to make your decision.” He breathed out, hot breath caressing her skin. “Be with me or push me away. Your choice.”
Her eyes were half-lidded, her breathing ragged and Donghyuck could count her eyelashes if he wanted to. It was torture to keep this little space between them because to him, they were like magnets, both desperately drawn to each other, wanting to consume one another.
Maybe it was like that for her too, because when she took her next breath, she had her fingers around the collar of his shirt, tugging it down so their lips met once again in a searing kiss.
It felt complete—no, it felt more than complete. It made him feel infinite. Every touch, every gasp, every little whimper that came out of her mouth made him feel alive and he wanted more, he wanted everything. He wanted her.
And to her, she was drawn to him like a moth to a flame, and it didn’t feel like she was doing something sinful, something forbidden. Everything felt right, the way her body fit his perfectly, the way he moved his lips against her, with the touch of their tongues nearly sending her down to her knees.
“Haechannie,” she breathed heavily as he ran his lips down her jaw to her neck, before he moved back up again, melding their lips together because he couldn’t waste any second longer being apart from her.
The desperate call of his name rendered him powerless so he pressed himself against her harder, embracing her better so they could hold on to each other. And by the relieved sigh she made as she circled her arms around his neck, her fingers finding a home in his hair, she must have felt the same.
“I love you,” he murmured against the supple skin of her neck, making a messy ponytail out of her hair to expose more skin. “Fuck, Noona, I’ve never loved anyone else but you.” He lifted her body up the wall, leaving her with no choice but to tangle her legs around his waist for balance, his hands sliding dangerously along her thighs as she connected their mouths again.
Donghyuck’s voice was deep and hoarse, foreign to her ears but she loved it. She loved everything new she found about him, as much as she had loved everything about him in the past. She knew she wasn’t being fair; she knew it wasn’t a good idea to hold him like this, but it felt so terrifyingly good and there was not a part of her mind and body that shouted for her to stop. He was her puppet master, plucking on her strings, and she didn’t mind being tangled under his fingers.
She flinched when she felt him pressing his hips against her, pinning her against the wall and he noticed as she moaned a bit louder against his mouth, pulling a similar groan from the back of his own throat. The sound of her lustful cry made him go absolutely insane and not familiar with his own strength, he carried her to the bed, making her yelp in shock and wrapping her legs and arms around him tighter in the fear of falling.
But the way he laid her down on his bed was surprisingly gentle, sliding down a pillow underneath her head before he dipped his face down, pressing a warm kiss on her temple. The sudden change of pace made her blush, cheeks blooming red as she became conscious of how he gazed at her features—how the previous loneliness in his eyes was replaced with both felicity and uncertainty, asking for her sign to stop or continue with everything.
She swallowed her breath when he stood on his knees, pulling his shirt over his head, his silver necklace glinting faintly under the soft glow of thunder that flashed on the other side of the window. She flinched, not from the fear of lightning, but from the way his vulnerable eyes were filled with need and affection. She had once told him that Jaemin made her feel wanted—made her feel desired—and she thought that was really the case, until she saw the look Donghyuck gave her and suddenly everything that Jaemin did felt pale in comparison.
Donghyuck needed her like a drowning man needed air.
So when he bent down and kissed her again, she felt like he was unraveling her soul, stripping her naked both her body and her mind, and as if she was a blank canvas, he cast iridescence on her skin, drawing lines with his fingertips and painted a spectrum of colors with his lips.
As a man of passion, Donghyuck’s kisses were strangely tender but it elicited as much fire, if not more, as any fervent kisses she had ever shared with the other two men in her life.
“Noona,” he abruptly stopped, eyes unfocused as he broke away, expanding the space between them but only for a few inches. “You’re not regretting any of this, are you?” It was the question he’d been dreading to ask, but he had to before she ended up living with guilt. “I told you to make a choice before but…” He cupped her cheek, rubbing his thumb against her skin in such a soothing manner that she would’ve probably fallen asleep to it if her heart wasn’t racing like this. “But if you feel like this is not what you want, you can back out anytime. I’m not going to force you, and I’m not going to leave you even if you push me away now. I’ll still be your friend, I promise, so it’s okay.” He smiled but the only thing it conveyed was sadness. “It’s okay if you want to put an end to this. It’s okay if you don’t want to be with me. It’s your choice.”
She wasn’t sure why, but she felt like crying. “Well, I’m not okay with it.” She ran her thumb along his lower lip, in a paper-thin-like touch. “I think you’ve noticed by now that I…” It was too much. It really was too much for her to admit it without being flustered.
“Tell me,” he pleaded, gently taking her wrist when she was about to cover her face with her hands. “Tell me how you feel about me. Please.”
She shook her head, heart thumping loudly. “I can’t—It’s embarrassing. You already know how I feel anyway.”
“But I need to hear you say it.” He kissed her palm, leaning against her touch like how a little kitten would. “Please?”
Her voice was quivering when she spoke. “I love you, Haechannie.”
He’d heard her say those words many times in his life, but only now, they felt different in his ears. And almost like a prisoner being released from his chains, he nearly whimpered in bliss. “Y-you do?”
She shakily nodded her head once. “You were right. I’m a coward. I’m too afraid of losing what we have, not realizing that we can actually become so much more.”
He smiled, small but lovingly. “And it’s fine even if I’m not your soulmate?”
She was entranced with the way he kissed her fingertips one by one. “I don’t care.”
“I love you too, Noona.” His tongue was wet and slick when she felt it against her earlobe, his voice sounding dangerously close and sultry, even when his words were innocent. “You don’t know how glad I am to finally hear you say this. I’ve tried so hard to move on but I couldn’t. It’s just—for me—” his lips hovered above hers again, and she felt his whispers directly on her skin. “There’s no life without you.”
She carded her fingers through his hair, pushing back his bangs until she could gaze directly into his eyes. “There’s no life without you too, Haechannie.”
As they were connected, both their bodies and minds, it felt like nothing mattered anymore. They already had what they needed, already owned what they craved, already found what they were searching for. Donghyuck was sheathed deep inside her, his kisses were wet and languid, passion never dissipating no matter how many times he had tasted her.
It never felt unnatural, never felt awkward, and there were no uncertainties whenever their skin made contact. It was almost as natural as breathing, and though they needed more experience in some parts, they were already content with everything that they shared. Every breath, every gasp, every moan was sending heat to every inch of their bodies, making Donghyuck’s bangs stick with sweat and her cheeks reddening from his feverish touches.
When it finally ended, both still feeling lightheaded from reaching their highs, orgasms hitting hard like waves in a storm, Donghyuck was shaking, murmuring both expletives and praises against the skin that covered her heart, making her shiver.
“What is it?” She questioned tenderly, gentle fingertips caressing his cheekbone. “You’re trembling.”
But he didn’t answer, laying his head down on her chest, her heartbeat vocalizing faintly against his eardrums. He had never felt so happy, so complete, so perfect, and it was all because of her.
“I’m…” he exhaled heavily, lost for words as he sank deeper in his own elation. She curled her fingers around his jaw, lifting his face so they could peer into each other’s eyes.
“Haechannie.”
“Yeah?”
“I know it’s late, but…” She beamed at him. “Happy birthday.”
And he kissed her with so much fervor, his eyebrows adjoined in passion and he whimpered against her mouth, a tear slipping from the corner of his eye and she smiled, hugging him close because finally, after seventeen years had passed, they truly found each other.
He was her life, and she was his, two different souls united into one.
***
Almost an hour passed by with them just enjoying each other’s company as they laid side-by-side on the bed, with Donghyuck idly sucking more bruises to her skin and her panting his name against his pillow. He was trailing his fingertips from her nape down to the dip of her spine as she laid with her stomach pressed against his sheets, slightly quivering from his touch.
Both of them lacked the energy to get dressed or wash their sweat away from before, and instead just dwell further in each other’s warmth, basking in the soft glow of the sunset that had replaced the storm.
“Why did we wait so long to do this?” She asked with her cheek pressed against the pillow, looking at him with drowsy eyes.
He snorted. “Because you were too big of an idiot to notice and too goddamn stubborn to—”
“Forget I asked.”
Donghyuck grinned to himself but she soon felt it on her skin. “I’m still sweaty, Haechannie, get off me.”
“No way, I want to enjoy this,” his nose was skimming against the skin of her back. “It’s not every day I have a naked lady lounging on my bed. In fact, I’ve never had one. Ever.”
“Yeah?” She turned around, covering her bare chest with his quilt as she looked at him. “What about your girlfriends?”
“What girlfriends?”
“You know, the ones you got together with in high school. You told me you had sex with them.”
“Oh.” His playful smile grew sheepish. “I lied about it.”
“What? Why?”
“I was just trying to make you jealous. You were hanging out with Jaemin and I was so pissed!”
“I can’t believe how lame you were.”
“Hey, I was desperate!”
“So…” She slowly said, drawing her name on the square of his chest with her fingertip. “I’m your first?”
“You’ve always been, on everything.”
Her breathing tattered, blood rushing to her face, turning it scarlet. She moved her hand to his neck, playing with the silver necklace and the oval locket with her fingers. “I can’t believe you still wear this.”
“It’s the best present I’ve ever had,” he replied, leaning close until their foreheads meet one another. “From the best girl I’ve ever met in my life.”
“Stop saying things like this, I can’t handle it.” And she hooked her finger around his necklace, dragging him down to close the gap between them.
They both smiled into the kiss but what was once innocent and chaste, became deep and ardent in a matter of seconds. Donghyuck’s fingers were slipping underneath the comforter that she used to cover her body, feverish skin meeting her cold one and he looked at her in concern. “Are you cold?”
“Just a little bit.” She chuckled awkwardly before it was replaced with a gasp when he pulled her up by her waist and positioned her on his lap. He snatched the quilt away from her in one quick motion, leaving her naked and exposed before she toppled down to his chest. His hands found their way back around her waist, drawing her close so every inch of her skin was pressing against his. His warmth began to seep into her, and he draped his blanket around their bodies again.
“Better?” He looked up, his teeth peeking behind his grin that was both teasing and shy at the same time.
She melted into his touch, wanting to taste his lips again. “Better.”
She was distracted with the way he ran his tongue along her lower lip, sneaking in as soon as she granted him entrance to her mouth, but found her focus back when his hands start to roam around her chest. She immediately covered herself with both hands, embarrassed out of her mind.
“Why are you covering yourself?” He asked, chuckling faintly though his cheeks were reddening by the second. “You were fine when we had sex before. Let me see.”
“I just remembered that you once said I have small boobs.”
Donghyuck’s jaw hung loosely on his face. “That—I was just joking! I love your boobs—I love every—” He thought hard for the right word and failing miserably. “—every aspect of them, how soft they are, the little moles you have, and how they jiggle when—Why are you laughing?!”
But she couldn’t stop cackling even when he was pouting about it, complaining that he was being serious. “I’m sorry,” she said, wiping a tear out of her eyes. “It’s just you were so dominatingly sexy before when you slammed me against the wall, and now you’re acting like such a dork, which is also cute but—” and she laughed again, covering her mouth with her fingers which he immediately took and replaced them with his mouth, turning her soft chuckles into pleading moans.
He cupped her breasts with his palms, groaning at the back of his throat from how perfect they felt under his hands, massaging them gently until she had to break away from the kiss, nibbling at her lip to contain her whimpers.
Donghyuck trailed more kisses down from her neck to the valley of her breasts, before he attached his soft, plump lips on her sensitive nub, making her arch her back in response. He peeked at her reaction from under his eyelashes, almost losing his mind from the sight of how alluring and sinful she looked. “Does it feel good?” He knew the answer but he needed her praise. He had waited for all this time to have her crying out his name in pleasure like this, he guessed he’d allow himself to be selfish just for tonight.
She shakily nodded, eyes tightly shut in pleasure but he didn’t stop until he had her whimpering, “Yes, yes,” into his ears.
“So about what you said before,” he continued, nipping at her sensitive skin with so much fervency, enough to leave purple bruises by the morning. “About me being dominatingly sexy. Is that the kind of thing you’re into?”
She shivered, looking like she wanted to escape his touch. “I—I don’t—” she stammered, having the hardest time finding her words especially when he had one of his eyebrows raised tauntingly. “Stop teasing me.”
“Guess being friends for seventeen years doesn’t really mean you know everything.” He chuckled, sliding down his hand between her thighs but stopping before he got too close, asking for permission. “Can I touch you here?”
She bit her lip, nodding slowly.
“Can we… have sex again?”
“Stop asking questions, and just do it.”
Their second time was much slower, more playful with a lot of teasing and exploring and it was the kind of sex that felt more like them, reminding them of how carefree they were back in their childhoods days, or the flirty banter they shared during their small escapes every summer. It took them hours to be satisfied with one another, at least until the next day started, that by the time they were finished, it was already nighttime. But even after they were dressed back in their previous clothes, they still found their way back in each other’s arms.
“I wasn’t sure to ask about this before but,” Donghyuck snuggled closer from behind, his lips almost brushing against her nape when he spoke in both curiosity and uncertainty. “How are things with Mark?”
“It’s so like you to ask about stuff that mattered after you got what you want,” she responded, making him pout and cower behind her. “We’re still going strong, actually. He said he’d ask me to marry him after we both graduated from college.”
He froze, literally stopped breathing. “What?”
“I’m kidding.” She turned around, tapping his cheek. “You’re cute.”
“That’s not funny.”
“I’m sorry.” And when she laughed, he pouted even harder. “Well, truth is, we broke up over a month ago.”
“What—” Shock filling his eyes. He thought he had known everything about her from seeing her memories in his dreams but maybe he hadn’t seen anything yet. “Why didn’t you tell me this?”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” She rolled her eyes. “I wasn’t aware we were on speaking terms what with you avoiding my calls and ignoring my texts.”
“You’re never gonna let me live this down, are you?” He sighed, playfully biting her at the part where her neck met her shoulder. “Why did you break up with him anyway? I thought soulmates were meant to be together, not that I’m complaining though.” He couldn’t help but display his cheeky grin. “I’m actually happy—it’s the happiest moment in my life, dare I say.”
She scoffed, shifting on the bed again so she wouldn’t have to face his annoying grin. “It certainly not the happiest moment in my life but as long as you’re happy, I guess.”
“I’m sorry, come here.” Donghyuck sneaked his hands around her body, hauling her toward him until he could press his chest tightly against her back, burying his nose in her hair. “So, what happened?”
“Well…” She huffed, leaning against him. “Mark and I… We’re so similar in a lot of ways and I find myself more compatible with him than anyone, which feels kinda weird, if I’m being honest. Like, we share the same thoughts, we make the same decisions, we listen to the same music, love the same movies and everything. Unlike when I’m with you—” she stopped when she felt his arms tightening around her. “Wait, before you start fuming, listen to me first.” He sighed but nodded his head twice before he landed his face on her hair again. “What I meant was when I’m with you, we argue, we tease each other, we fight over stupid little things so we can look back on it in the future and have a good laugh from realizing how dumb we were being. And that’s what makes it exciting for me. You make me laugh, you make me upset, and when you suddenly disappeared from my life it was like…” she tried, but whether she was too shy or too confused to say the words, Donghyuck wasn’t sure so he helped.
“Like a part of you was missing?” He offered with a smile, nuzzling closer to her.
“Well, I don’t want to sound that cheesy but for the lack of better words, yes,” she admitted. “I just really couldn’t stop thinking about you. I missed you in the way I’ve never missed anyone before, like I kept seeing you anywhere I go. Whenever a Michael Jackson song came up in my playlist, I thought of you. Whenever I saw a movie, I remembered how you would always scrunch your nose in protest when something didn’t make sense. And I felt awful every time because I wasn’t supposed to think about you at all. I was supposed to think about Mark, and how he always tried to make me feel comfortable in his arms, kept asking me whether the room temperature was too cold or too hot, whether I needed another cup of coffee or—”
“He actually sounds pretty nice,” he murmured against her skin. “I’d date him if I were you.”
“Exactly, he’s too perfect.” She turned around, placing both hands on his shoulders. “He’s too perfect, Haechannie. That’s my problem.”
Haechan snorted but he also seemed amused. “This is why boys have problems trying to understand girls.”
“Doesn’t it make sense, though? You have so many flaws—like, so many. You have more flaws in you than your strengths.”
He flatly stared back. “Thanks.”
“But that’s what makes you interesting.” She reached out a hand, playing with the waves of his hair. “That’s what makes you adorable.” When she noticed him turning slightly red on his cheeks, she chuckled awkwardly. “Or maybe I’m just a freak who has a kink for annoying brats, I don’t know.”
Donghyuck smiled softly in return, rubbing his thumb in comforting circles on the skin below her eye. “Well then, I’m glad you have a kink for annoying brats like me.” And when they kissed, he could feel her grinning against his lips so he tore himself away, frowning. “What?”
“I didn’t realize you were this sappy and clingy.” She giggled, pecking his nose. “You really love kissing, don’t you?”
“I love kissing you,” he corrected, slightly wincing at the thought of the previous kisses he’d shared with his former girlfriends. “There’s a difference. And I’m not sappy, I am full with affection.” She teased him with a loud, exaggerated yawn but he ignored her, focusing on the things that hadn’t been spoken. “So, you broke up with him because he was too nice? How did you even tell that to him?”
“No.” Her tone suddenly became heavy. “We broke up because he no longer had faith in me. It was not long after he read my journal.”
“What journal?”
“Okay, now, don’t laugh, but I’ve been keeping a journal lately to help me think and…” He couldn’t see her face, but he could tell she was flushed. “Well, figure things out. So I wrote a lot of things about you, about us, about how I truly felt about you but couldn’t be with you because of the things we’ve been through. And the fact that I’ve been dreaming about you—”
“What?” His breath hitched in his throat. “Like a soulmate dream or just your regular wet dream about me?”
It was vexing the way he sounded so serious when he asked her the most insensitive question at times like this. “It felt similar to how I dreamt about Mark which is weird because how can that be? What does that even mean? I can’t have two soulmates at once, can I?”
Donghyuck contemplated in silence, unsure of his thoughts but eventually made his decision. “Okay,” he shifted his weight, now sitting on the bed, and gesturing for her to meet his eyes. “I have a secret I’ve been wanting to tell you but since we weren’t on speaking terms—”
“Thanks to you—”
“—yeah, thanks to me. I decided to keep it a secret. And I realized that I didn’t want to tell you that because I wanted you to figure out by yourself that you have feelings for me.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been having dreams about you too.” He unconsciously reached out for her hand, lacing their fingers together. “I saw your memories. I knew that they weren’t mine because I’ve dreamt about the time you spent with Jaemin and Mark, but I didn’t say anything because I want you to fall for me for who I am, not because I have connections to your dreams or because it turns out I’m your soulmate.”
She gaped in disbelief. “How long have you been dreaming about me?”
His voice grew quiet. “Since that night when we kissed.”
Her mouth was shaping into a silent ‘o’ but no words came out. She was deep in her thoughts and Donghyuck had to squeeze her hand to bring her out of her reverie. “Noona?”
“So it wasn’t just because of the kiss, was it? That morning when you were acting weird, asking me about my feelings?”
He nodded reluctantly. “I thought you were experiencing the same thing, but then you told me you had another dream about Mark, and not soon after, I saw him with my own eyes.”
Something befell on her face, eyes wide in realization. “So, it was true—what I saw in my dream. You’d met Mark way before I did but you never told me about him—you even told him to stay away—”
“Yes, but—” He ran his hands through his hair in frustration. “I know that was a total dick move, but—”
“You had no right, Hyuck.”
The way she called him by his real name made him freeze for a split second. “You’re… really upset about this, aren’t you?”
She tried not to scowl at him harder than she already did. With a sigh, she massaged her temple. “Well, I guess I should’ve seen that coming. You’ve always been acting like that anyway. You and your possessive, competitive ass.”
“But,” he said, smiling bashfully. “Will you love me and my possessive, competitive ass for the rest of your life?”
“One step at a time, Haechannie.” She pressed her palm against his face, wiping his annoying smirk away. “One step at a time.”
***
Unbeknownst to them, it turned out that being in an intimate relationship didn’t really change the way they behave around each other. They still fought over the little things but always agreed on the things that mattered. They shared loving words as much as they had done numerous times in the past, only this time they shared them between lustful gasps and lascivious groans.
Their long-distance relationship was hard during their years in college as they went to different campuses in different cities, but only because they couldn’t feel each other’s lips and breaths on their skins, so every time a long holiday came up, they would spend it somewhere where they could be alone, tangled in each other’s arms, moaning terms of endearments laced with desperation and urgency against the sheets.
It was funny how they kept having dreams about each other’s memories, even after they admitted their feelings out loud. Every morning whenever they were apart, they would send text messages, describing the memories they saw in their dreams, that it became some kind of a new habit for them. It was harmless most of the time, but Donghyuck became unreasonably jealous more often than not, whenever he saw Jaemin or Mark in her memories. He would spout out hateful words, calling their names with degradation, and she would sigh and wave him off, being the mature one in the relationship.
She had a theory about why he was dreaming about her, and why did her dreams change from Mark’s memories into his. She said it had something to do with their feelings, that if they loved someone so dearly, their dreams began to change from seeing the soulmate they were originally matched with, to the person they truly loved. And if the feelings were mutual, they would begin to dream about each other. Donghyuck didn’t pay too much attention to it, because it didn’t matter to him. Soulmates or not, dreams or no dream, he’d still love her with all his heart.
They kept their relationship a secret because they knew how their parents believed in soulmates and didn’t want to make them worry. But whenever they had sleepovers in his house, leaving their bedroom door open as instructed, keeping secrets became torture because Donghyuck always found a way to pepper playful kisses on her cheek. And playful kisses always turned perilous when they fell on her lips, and once the tip of their tongues met in curiosity, just wanted to get a glimpse of each other’s taste, there would be no turning back.
So they exchanged deep kisses and sinful strokes under the duvet, closing their eyes shut and pretending to sleep whenever rustling sounds or footsteps could be heard from the other side of their slightly ajar door. Donghyuck would whine something about, “Noona, I can’t do this. I can’t come like this,” even though he grew hotter and larger in her hand, and she would raise a teasing eyebrow with a smirk painting her face. She would then sneak under the sheet, crawl down his body, and blow hot breath against his tip, before engulfing him completely. And Donghyuck would bite into his fist, eyebrows furrowing in ecstasy, eyes shut closed as he imagined the way she would hollow her cheeks around him, with her tongue running along his veins and he would come undone in seconds. “Already?” She would ask with a teasing grin, wiping her tainted mouth with the back of her hand. “I must be super good at this.”
Donghyuck would let her win, just for the night. He could always pay her back the next day, he figured, when his parents were still deep in slumber, and the sun was still hiding somewhere out of sight. He knew how much she loved seeing him between her legs, with his eyes half-lidded and his lips sucking bruises on the inner parts of her thighs. And he loved seeing her face contorted in pleasure every time he brought her tongue deep inside her, remembering her taste better than anything he had ever tasted. Whenever her body started to shake, hands tangling desperately against his locks, her legs closing in on him, he would lick everything that seeped out of her, glance up to meet her eyes, and lick his lower lip in satisfaction before he said, “Already? I must be super good at this.”
“You know,” she sighed one day when she curled against his chest in a hotel room that smelled like cinnamon mixed with sandalwood. “I’ll probably end up getting pregnant with Hyuck Jr from how often we have sex.”
“I don’t mind.” He laced their fingers together, tracing his tongue on the side of her neck before he marked her with his teeth. “Hyuck Jr sounds hella cool.”
“Of course, you don’t mind. You say that to get more sex.” She wiggled away, shoving him gently by the jaw. “Stop that, I have work today.” And as much as he wanted to ignore her, painting more of his signature down her body so everyone would know who owned her, he stopped with a pout because she could really be terrifying when she got angry.
“Noona~ Come back to bed,” he whined, as he watched her stepped down the bed, getting dressed. “I need you to love me again. I’m needy.”
“You are gross, and I am late. Where the hell is my bra?”
Donghyuck grinned in amusement, watching her running from one corner to another only in her panties. “Man, have I told you how much I love your boobs?”
“Stop staring and help me find my clothes!”
She soon collected every piece of her clothing back without his help as he just kept lazing around on the bed, giggling every time she tripped over something.
“Noona.”
“Hmm?”
“Have you ever thought about being this intimate with me back then?” Donghyuck flipped over to his stomach, crossing his arms idly on top of his pillow before he dipped his chin between them. “Before we got together. Have you ever thought about kissing me?”
Her cheeks were flushed. “W-what kind of question is—”
“I need to know whether you were as crazy as I was about you.” His smile was both teasing and gentle. “Please?”
“Fine.” She eventually succumbed with a sigh. “Remember back then when you said you were going on a date with that girl you’d been seeing for two weeks? Not sure why, but when I thought about you kissing her, I was also thinking about you kissing me.”
“You did?” He gaped, mouth wide open. “Way back then? And you still went out with those douchebags instead of being with me?” He protested, sinking his face in his pillow as he muffled his whine. “Noonaaaa~”
“It was just a fleeting thought! It wasn’t anything that serious.” She put on her stockings, having the hardest time focusing from all the embarrassment she had to endure. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Well, now that I know you’ve been thinking about me that way for quite some time, what kind of things did you imagine us doing?” And when he didn’t answer right away, lost for words, she added with a sly smirk. “Don’t tell me you jacked off while thinking about me.”
He was good at controlling his expressions, but his ears betrayed him right away from how red they were turning. “No comment,” he muttered, sinking half of his face into his pillow.
She rolled her eyes, snorting. “Well, that’s fair.”
“What about the future? Have you ever thought about our future together?” The sudden question made her gaze back at him. “What do you see happening to us in ten years?”
She was fiddling with the buttons of her blouse, but her mind drifted somewhere else. She had thought about it. Thought about growing old with him. Thought about them getting married, have a child—or maybe three. Thought about how nervous and panicky he would get when her water broke, and how whiny he would be whenever she asked him to do house chores but ended up doing everything perfectly. She had thought about how cute he’d look as a father, telling a little boy—who looked exactly like him—during his first try at riding a bicycle that it’s okay to cry if it hurts when you fall because daddy is going to hug you and make the pain go away, okay?
She had thought about it, more often than not, but he had just graduated from college and she was in her first year working as an intern in a high-tech company. They still had a lot of things going on in their lives. Maybe he wasn’t ready to settle down yet. Maybe he needed time.
“Babe?” He called. “You’ve been quiet for a while.”
“You want an honest answer?”
“Yes, please.”
“I see you growing bald from all of those hair products you use.”
“Why you little—”
***
“What’s this?” She questioned as he slid a little black box with a red bow wrapped around it—a spitting image of the gift she had presented to him a few years back—into her hand. She remembered the joke he made that night, so she mirrored his action, faking a gasp while squealing, “No way, you’re proposing to me? But honey, I’m already carrying your child!”
He laughed, a bit bashful and awkward, but he understood her joke. “But wait, if you’re seriously carrying my child, I will hate you for the rest of my life for breaking the news like this.”
“I’m not, calm down.” She chuckled, and they walked next to each other again, enjoying how peaceful the Han River was at night, with cherry blossoms petals dancing in the wind.
“Are you cold?” He asked though she was already wearing multi-layered clothes.
“What, are you gonna wrap your coat around me?”
“Nah, just asking. I’m more sensitive to cold than you anyway.”
“Thanks.” She rolled her eyes before she focused back on the tiny present. “What is this for? Our anniversary is still a month away.”
“Just shut up and open it.” He sniffed from the cold, tucking his hands deeper inside his coat. “And hurry up. I’m freezing. I need you to warm me up.”
“I swear to God, can’t you at least be romantic for five minutes?”
“Okay, five minutes. After that, we’ll run back home and have hot, dirty sex.”
She scowled at him which he returned wholeheartedly with a playful kiss on her cheek. She opened the box and smiled when she saw a similar oval locket necklace that matched the one he wore around his neck. “You’re so predictable,” she sneered, taking the necklace in her hand. “But I love it.”
“You haven’t seen what’s inside.” He whispered close in her ear. “I’ll give you a little spoiler. It’s not a picture of us taking a bath together when we were kids but it’s something similar.”
“Ah, I get it. Is it the time when we—” But her sentence ended abruptly in silence at the sight of the words that were engraved on the silver plate.
Will you marry me?
“Haechannie—” And as she turned around to face him, he already had one knee on the ground, taking her hand in his and she could feel shivers running through his fingertips. The soft glow of the streetlight illuminated his face most beautifully, with his bangs fluttering softly under the wind. His chocolate brown eyes were so gentle, so loving, so shy, matching the way his cheeks were reddening with more seconds passing by. When he pronounced her name, it felt like he was casting spells on her, bewitching her with his smile, his voice, his scent, his everything.
“Okay, so I’ve written a whole speech—like, a whole speech,” he repeated, emphasizing with a deeper voice. “And it would probably take me a good half an hour to recite it to you and I don’t think either of us wants to stand here for even a minute longer, so if you can just say yes now, I’ll do the speech later when we’re warm and cozy and naked in our bed.”
She was prepared to cry in joy but she ended up crying from the hilarity of it all. “What the hell was that? Haechannie—”
“I’m serious, Noona, a whole speech!” His teeth were beginning to chatter. “Trust me! Can you just accept my stupid proposal now so we can go home?”
“What is this, a blackmail?”
“Noona~”
She hauled him up to his feet again with both hands. “Well then, let’s go home,” she said, sinking their intertwined hands in her coat’s pocket before she tugged him forward. “If you amaze me with that whole speech of yours, then I’ll say yes.”
Donghyuck grinned. “You got it.”
He kept his promise from the beginning to the end. As they stepped into the little apartment they had been sharing in secret for the last few months, Donghyuck had her pressed against the wall, kicking the front door closed with one foot, before he moved it to slide his knee between her thighs, giving her the friction she needed. Clothes were soon scattered on the floor as they walked and tripped their way to the bedroom, silently shouting gratitudes to the heater that kept the place warm while they were gone.
“So,” she breathed against his mouth, pressing her bare chest to his slightly colder one. “Your speech. Go.”
“In a minute,” he said, smirking as he gestured her to sit on the edge of the bed. When she followed, he kneeled in front of her, spread her legs apart, and licked his lower lip as he stared at her arousal. He pushed his bangs out of his eyes, saying, “I have my priorities and this. comes. first,” and he dipped his head low, hot tongue pressing against her most sensitive part, forcing her to chant his name like a prayer.
But when their feet were tangled around one another on the bed, her hands buried deep in his hair while he raked his fingernails down her spine, Donghyuck murmured the things she didn’t realize she needed to hear. He reminded her of the precious memories they had shared, of the feelings they had even back then when they were too young to understand love, of his promises to make her happy—to make her feel complete and infinite until the end of her days—and of his cute, little fantasies of how the future was going to be for the two of them and their future children.
And as he pounded into her, with hard, deep thrusts, hips moving faster and faster each time she moaned against his ear, driving him to the edge of his sanity, he demanded her to say her answer to his proposal. With pleasure clouding her mind, she could no longer think about any word other than yes.  
***
“It has a private pool and a jacuzzi, you’ll love it, babe, trust me,” Donghyuck said into his phone, grinning to himself every time he heard a giggle coming from the other line. “I know I said no surprises this time, but I made the reservation like a month ago so you can’t really blame me for it.”
He silently thanked the florist who handed him a bouquet of red roses before he exited the store and head back to his car. He placed the flowers on the passenger seat next to him, along with two little custom-made alpaca plushies wearing wedding attires, and a tiny white box with a pair of engagement rings inside.
“Look, we’re celebrating your birthday in that resort whether you like it or not,” he said, looking like he was about to burst into laughter in a matter of seconds from hearing her adorable complaints. “It’s not that expensive, I swear! And even if it is, I’m completely fine with using my three months' worth of salary to please my girlfriend.” There was a loud shouting on the other side of the line, and he chuckled, “I’m kidding, Noona. Look, I’m heading to your workplace. I’ll see you in half an hour, okay?” His gaze softened. “Me too. I love you too. Bye.”
When the line got disconnected, Donghyuck leaned against the back of his seat, huffing to the air, his heart banging loud against his chest. The first proposal was all fun and games, but this time, he was serious about it. He had prepared everything, dressed sharply in a black suit and a white buttoned-up shirt, and memorized his lines by heart from practicing it over a hundred times in front of his bathroom mirror a few hours ago. He had taken a day off to make sure everything went perfectly, but now as he seated behind the wheels, about to see her face and the bright, beautiful smile she always threw at him whenever he graced her with his presence, he became so nervous, so afraid of ruining his plan.
A text message arrived, interrupting his thoughts.
There’s a birthday gift on my desk under your name. My co-workers are getting jealous. Why are you so perfect?
And before he could reply, another one came by.
I love you, Haechannie.
All of his concerns began to dissipate from his chest. It would be okay if he ruined one thing or two while undergoing his plan. She would forgive him with a smile. She always did. She had always accepted him the way he was.
So he texted her back.
There’s no life without you, Noona.
And that was the truth. He had only truly lived because of her.
He placed his phone on the dashboard of his car, wore back his seatbelt, and started the engine. His thoughts were so full of her as much as his heart was, that a smile began to grow permanent on his face. Even as he began to drive, he still had the hardest time focusing on everything else but her.
It was until a truck passed at high speed, smashed his car from the side with a loud, thunderous bang, sending tremors of pain all over his body before his thoughts could process the details.
And suddenly, what was once vibrant with a spectrum of colors, his world turned monochromatic once again.
***
441 notes · View notes
pikemoreno · 4 years ago
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lucky
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pairing: marcus moreno x gn!reader
request: from @chibi-liz05​ “Can I request a Marcus Moreno fic (or ficlet, or drabble) where either Marcus or reader gets hurt (not seriously hurt) and end up in a med bay, kinda woozy from pain meds and they have a funny and/or cute conversation when the other one goes to check on the one hurt? Please.”
warnings: mentions of blood, injuries, death. it starts out pretty darn angsty, but gets silly and fluffy i promise. these two are hella married.
word count: 2.7k
a/n: honestly this is nothing like you asked for until the end? but this lil drabble idea inspired this whole one shot so i hope you enjoy what you helped my brain create? i loved this, needless to say.
i love this himbo and i’m so happy to write for him.
And thank you for the medical advice to @disgruntledspacedad! Thanks for helping me choose the right drug! 😆
wanna join a taglist? | masterlist
This was Marcus’s least favorite part of his job. 
As the newly deemed Director of the Heroics, he was the one to decide who went out on what mission when and with who. Normally it wasn’t too tall of an order. After all, he was chosen as director for good reason. He was perfect for the job. He was smart, organized, resourceful, and tried in everything to understand people-- whether that be in their personal habits or in their superpowered strengths. He was often commended for his ability to form the perfect teams for whatever job arose; and it came pretty naturally, it really did. 
That is, until emotion got involved, until personal bias compromised his decision making.
He was determined to not let you go on the mission, absolutely not. The band of powered individuals the team was going after were incredibly dangerous and unpredictable.They’d been a problem for months and this mission was all or nothing. The high stakes and vulnerable position made him incredibly reluctant to make you a part of the team that was heading out under the cover of night to apprehend them. When he didn’t name you among them, he was immediately countered by the rest of the heroes in the room about the choice. 
By all the accounts they were right. Given the tactics of the mission at hand, your teleportation abilities were perfect for the job. And if he was being even a little more honest, he’d agree with Miracle Guy that not sending you with them was a “disservice to the team.” It was and he knew it. In a very un-Marcus Moreno move, he was making the completely wrong choice and he wasn’t going to let the sound judgement of anyone else change his mind.
“Psion is not going and that is final,” he boomed. The room became deathly silent. “Now, go get ready. You leave in 20.” But no one moved, no one could. They were glued to the floor, watching their unflappable leader become uncharacteristically flapped. 
Marcus was the one to stomp out of the room first and you followed him without hesitation.
“Marcus,” you called, nearly running to keep up with long strides. “Marcus!” 
He didn’t even deign to turn around.
In a blink you were now in front of Marcus, hands out to stop him from continuing on without talking to you.
“No teleporting outside of work, Psion” he snapped lowly, but he still obliged your silent request and remained in front of you. You blinked at the small outburst.
“Mind losing the ‘tude so we can talk like adults?” You countered. Marcus lowered his head and whispered an apology. At that you stepped closer to him, your hands coming to rest on his tense shoulders in a soothing manner. “What’s bothering you, love? You know you can talk to me. This isn’t like you at all.”
When his eyes met yours again they were pained.
“It’s too dangerous,” was all he could get out at the moment. His exhale was unsteady as he leaned in, his forehead meeting yours in a much more “Marcus” gesture that brought you both back down to earth.
You sighed, fingers carding through the short hairs at the nape of his neck. “Of course it is. It always is.”
“Not like this,” he countered, biting his lip. “These guys are no joke.”
“Neither am I,” you grinned, tapping his nose with your own before pulling back to look at his face in full. He laughed a little, but it wasn’t whole-hearted, you saw it in his eyes.
“And I trust you. I do. I know you’re capable. I just--”
“Worry?” 
“Yeah, that.” His eyebrows were furrowed. You softly ran a thumb across the harsh lines it made, smoothing them and making him smile.
“I’m not going to lie to you and say nothing is going to happen. Because it might.” He winced at the words, not wanting to think too hard on what “it” could be. “But I’m prepared and so is the rest of the team. We’re gonna watch each other’s backs like we always do and getting everyone out safely is going to be our priority over completing the mission. It’s going to be business as usual and it’s going to be OK. I’m going to be OK. You’ve gotta let me go. They need me out there tonight.”
“I know,” he sighed. “Just… Be careful. Be ready in 10.” You sighed in relief.
“Thank you, Marcus.” You kissed him. “It’s gonna be fine.” He kissed you. “We’ve got ‘em this time. I know it.” One last kiss, strong and lingering. You tilted your head, an invitation-- no, a plead-- for a deeper kiss, which he obliged before being the one to break it. 
“Go,” he murmured, “Or you won’t make it before they leave.” You nodded, taking a deep breath. “Be careful. I love you.”
“I love you too.” You smiled through the sudden onset of nerves before turning and walking down the hallway to join up with the rest of the team.
***
That had been hours ago. Now Marcus was in command with a skeleton crew, the late hours of the assignment sending most of the support and technical team home. He quickly decided that was probably for the best. The sweet little interns did not need to see their mentor so stressed and antsy. No, he had to be “on” for them, he had to be the Marcus Moreno. And he couldn’t be that right now. Right now he was an anxious husband and teammate. 
“Where are they now, Connie?” he asked the poor woman at the comms desk behind him for the upteenth time that hour.
“Trackers say they’re still in the hanger, sir. Last update was that they had the grunts and were waiting for the ring leader to respond to their distress call.”
He wasn’t responding. It’d been two hours. And that was a major cause for concern.
“Tell them to just bring who they have back here and we’ll keep searching for him. This is still a win as far as I’m concerned.”
The man who was on comms moved to press the talk button to speak to the team, but the comm crackled to life before he had the opportunity. 
“It’s an ambush!” Miracle Guy yelled from the other side, “We’re sitting ducks out here!”
Marcus’ heart dropped into his stomach. 
“Go! Go! Get back to the-” He heard your panicked voice call out, the sentence interrupted by a cry of pain. 
The room spun. Marcus knew he was yelling but he couldn’t hear a word of what he said. It all just sounded like white noise now, mixing with the jumbled thoughts in his head and the ringing in his ears. He must’ve said something right though, because everyone was working. One was arranging a rescue, one was calling out the vitals of the team via the trackers on their wrists-- everything seemed fine by the tone of voice, but Marcus couldn’t be sure. He couldn’t grasp a word that was said to him. He was totally on autopilot, only able to respond in vague nods of yes or no. 
“Hey,” one voice next to him cut through the fog and he looked up to Lucas, the man who ran comms, “They’re going to be ok.”
Marcus’s response was non-committal, not wanting to pull the young man down to share his current state of mind, but not allowing himself to share in his confident optimism either.
The next hour went by in a whirlwind and the next thing he knew, Marcus was downstairs in the medical wing waiting on you and your team to arrive. He’d been in this position before and the thought of it made his throat close up. The images flashed through his mind of a gurney and too much blood and a confused little girl and black clothing on a rainy day in April. 
He closed his eyes harder as if to block it all out. 
No, it couldn’t be like last time.
It was then that he heard the distinct sound of the sliding doors opening and the murmur of a small group of people. His eyes shot open and, though he stood to his feet, he felt that he could collapse in relief. There was no gurney. Minimal blood-- just a couple of cuts on your face. You were hobbling in, arm around Miracle Guy as he helped you keep pressure off of your left leg. Your face was pained, which probably should have concerned him more, but he was just too happy to see you upright… Breathing. As long as he had that, you could get through anything else together. 
He watched as the medical team surrounded all of you, asking questions, prodding delicately at injuries. Marcus could vaguely hear your voice cutting in and out through it all. 
“Super strength… Kicked… Broken.” 
They had asked you a couple more unheard questions that you responded to in a simple yes or no and then they were leading you to sit on one of the beds. He watched as you went, noticing the way you were looking around for… Something.
Oh.
He smiled.
You were looking for him.
In all his panic and then relief, it hadn’t occurred to him that you would want to see him just as badly in your current state. His heart warmed at the way your tired eyes lit up when they met his. He all but ran to you. 
“Hey baby,” he cooed, leaning in to capture your lips in a deep kiss. He’d never been more in awe of you, that you were real, that way you were his, that he could kiss you freely. When he pulled away he observed your injuries closer. Head wounds were always scary amounts of bloody, but he could see that all of the cuts were minor. He brushed a strand of hair away from where sweat and blood had plastered it to your forehead. “What happened? How are you feeling?”
“I’ve been better,” you hissed as a stab of pain surged through your leg. He looked down to observe it. His immediate diagnosis wasn’t a good one. It was terribly hard to break a femur, but he was certain this was exactly what it would look and feel like. “Some super-strength asshole kicked me in the thigh to knock me down and--” You winced again. “They think she broke my femur, and I would have to agree.”
“I have to say I’m thinking that too,” he sighed. “I’m so sorry.” He kissed your forehead in between the cuts.
“What are you sorry for? You’re the one that tried to keep me from going. I forced you to let me go.”
“I should’ve stood my ground and had you and the team be mad at me,” he said completely seriously. 
“You’re ridiculous.” You side-eyed him, but smiled through the words. One of the medical staff returned at that moment, bringing over supplies to clean your cuts and asking if you’d like something for the pain while they got prepped for surgery. You nodded eagerly. 
“I’ll take this over,” Marcus said, hands open to take the first aid kit, “If you want to go get that?”
“Oh, sir I couldn’t ask you to--” The young woman gawked, slightly unbelieving that her boss’s boss’s boss would volunteer to do her job.
“You’re not asking me, I’m asking you.”
“A-- Yes, right away.” She handed him the kit and seemed to flee his presence to get an IV ready. You sat in silence a few moments as he prepared everything. He seemed lost, even in this small task. It took him longer than it should’ve to get his ducks in a row.
“Someone’s a little edgy,” you prodded, watching as too-intense eyes focused on cleaning dried blood from your forehead. He shook his head, eyes softening, but maintaining their focus. The whole endeavor was very clearly an attempt at keeping his hands as busy as his mind was. 
“I’d thought I‘d lost you. I thought...” His jaw tightened-- and it wasn’t due to the effort of wiping up blood. You stopped his hand from continuing its ministrations, lacing your fingers together.
“That it was all happening again?” you whispered. 
“It was like deja vu, baby. Everything was just like before.” The last word almost came out like a whimper. 
“But it’s not. I’m right here. I’m ok.” You brought your forehead to meet his comfortingly. The cuts stung just a little at the touch, but you remained there with him, feeling a deep, grounding breath fan lightly across your face.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
You kissed his nose and pulled away as you heard the medic return with the Versed for the pain. Marcus stayed right by your side as you were put on the IV, a hand staying firmly on yours. Which more for him than for you if he was honest. It brought him back to reality and out of his head. He no longer had to imagine the worst, because the best had happened. You were really there. It wasn’t a repeat of the aching horror of seven years before, the day that still had you shaking him awake from unspoken nightmares. You’d made it home to him and Missy-- but he was going to be hard-pressed to go against his better judgment again, no matter how much the team needed you.
“Alright, you’ll start to feel it in just a few seconds. We’ll be back soon to take you into surgery, ok?” the medic explained to you as the IV was in place. You nodded. 
“In the meantime, let me keep working on this,” Marcus gestured to the bandages in the kit. As he got to work, he watched the look in your eyes totally change, the Versed taking effect. 
“Are you alright?” he asked, covering the cut that just barely grazed your right eyebrow.
“Yeah, I’m good,” you sighed dreamily in a total demeanor change. The whole room lit up in his eyes. Marcus grinned at the way your posture slumped just slightly in relaxation. “And how are you?” you winked. Oh, this was going to be fun. He really needed to keep you talking.
“I’m doing great. Happy to be here with you, sweetheart. Now, sit still while I take care of this last cut,” he cooed. 
“Ok,” you giggled. “What a charmer.” 
“I try my best, darling.” He played along, enjoying the way the Versed had turned you into a starstruck girl with a crush.
“Oh noooo,” you squeaked suddenly.Marcus panicked, checking you over quickly for further injury. 
“What is it? Are you ok?” 
But you only grabbed his left hand, holding it up.
“You’re married!” 
Marcus blinked. What was in that stuff they’d given you? You put your face in your hands and Marcus tried to contain his laughter at the way your voice was muffled by your fingers. “You’ve been so nice and caring! I wanted to ask you on a dateeee. I’m so sorry if I came on too strong.”
“Baby,” he called with a sweet lilt to his voice-- still trying to hold in a laugh. 
“You shouldn’t call me that,” you sighed sadly, pouting, “You’re married. We can’t be together.” 
“Of course I’m married,” he held your left hand up now, “I’m married to you, you goof.” You blinked at the silvery ring on your finger. 
“Oh!” you practically yelled, “That’s so cool!” Marcus’ heart warmed at the way your eyes lit up at the realization. Even drugged out of your mind you were excited to be with him. He couldn’t help but feel likewise.
“I agree,” he smiled, “It’s very cool.” He intertwined his fingers and yours. 
“I’m so lucky,” you grinned toothily in response. It was so unlike the smiles you usually gave him: too exaggerated and, in a word, dopey. But it held the same affection. 
“No, I’m definitely the lucky one,” he countered. Your grin faltered slightly as you grew sleepy-- another possible effect of the Versed, he guessed. “Now, go ahead and lay back for me ok? I’ll see you as soon as you’re out of surgery.” You nodded in agreement and then right off to sleep.
Oh, he could not wait for you to get out so he could tell you about just how “lucky” the two of you were.
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cornacopicimagines · 5 years ago
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after hours│t.h
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pairing: professor!tom holland x reader 
words: 6.9k (hehe nice)
warnings: swearing, PURE FILTH, sir kink, rough sex, masturbation (male & female), exhibition kink if you squint, spanking & sort of public sex.
summary:  It's wrong, y/n tells herself. She can't help it though. She can't help fantasising about him. At the other end of the class, Tom tells himself to stop staring at her. It's creepy, he thinks. Neither one knows of the mutual pining that is until tension bubbles over. 
a/n: I’m back bitches! I'm still a fucking sinner and this is such a cliche, I'm so so sorry
masterlist
━━★✼☆。
y/n sat at the desk. Her eyes never left Mr. Holland. Her attention never left the way the veins in his arms bulged when he picked up the massive textbook, never left his perfectly gelled hair and how it sat atop his head like it was crafted to from the day he was born. Perhaps I should start typing the notes that were on the board, she scowled to herself.
She feels dirty, almost ashamed of her crush on him. She hates herself for falling into a stupid cliché that had been so easy to avoid all these tireless years. y/n doesn't know why she has gone back to a love-sick teenage girl fantasising about a boy who she'll never even get to touch. A boy that so out of her league, he wouldn't even had the faintest idea that she exists. That doesn't stop them though. y/n still finger fucks herself to an orgasm that no boy has been able to give her in her 24 years of life, all the while wishing it was his cock instead of her fingers. If Mr. Holland knew what she did to herself under the influence of him and his stupidly handsome face, he would be disgusted. This she knows for a fact.
This isn't what she thought she would be doing, in all honesty. She is a semester away from graduating and she never wanted to be stuck in a perpetual state of wanting someone so unattainable it's not uneasy, it's borderline unethical. She truly believed she would have ancient married professor that sound like their legs deep in their coffin. Instead she got a literal Greek God as her Psych professor.
She knows that she's not the only one of course. y/n has met 10 other girls in her class that probably write god awful poetry about Mr. Holland's liquid bronze eyes. She can't blame them, if she could write shitty poetry about him, she 100% would. y/n not angry either, she knows out of the 120 students (110 of whom are girls), are probably all in the same predicament. She sometimes gets dirty looks from them when Mr. Holland address her by her first name.
Perhaps that's something she should consider; he calls her y/n not Miss y/l/n or just simply Miss. It's different, it's endearing and when he has a raspy voice, it's so fucking hot.
"y/n," a voice called out, she shook herself out of her haze, "are you still with us?" Mr. Holland was no standing over her. His cologne surrounding her, intoxicating her. y/n gulped softly before turning her eyes to his.
"Yes, sorry sir," y/n replied quickly, trying her hardest not to stumble over her own words or even let the blush run to her cheeks.
Mr. Holland smiled warmly, "that's good, I need at least one of you listening," the class erupting in laughter, "I would prefer it to be one of the brightest." That though got them quiet. y/n sunk into her chair in embarrassment. The blush she had been fighting rose to the surface, making her even more adamant not to look up at him but alas she couldn't.
In that small fleeting moment, she caught something in his eyes. She couldn't define exactly what it was. Whatever it truly was, y/n knew teachers should not be looking at their students in such a way. It made her even more lightheaded with admiration.
The lesson continued on as normal for another hour. Mr. Holland described the outline for the next assignment, it seemed short and sweet. Write a 2-thousand-word essay on the effects of unintentional recreational drugs during early childhood. y/n had to laugh at the way Mr. Holland phrased it. It was as if he had never touch pot in his entire life, to be fair, y/n wouldn't be too surprised if he didn't. Most of the girls in his class groaned at the mere mention of actual work and not an hour and a half session of pure toe-curling orgasm material. Now that she thinks about it, that would be a wonderful way to spend her Wednesday mornings and Thursday afternoons.
Of course, y/n was in another word during the last minutes of the lesson. Unable to focus on anything other than the hint of a tattoo peeking through the underlining of his shirt. She was working so hard to distinguish what it was that she had completely missed the end of the lesson and the dozens of people walking out.
"y/n, what exactly are you doing?" Mr. Holland's voice asked above her. y/n almost jumped in her seat, but she stayed completely still. "This is the second time today, should I be worried?"
This though made her jump out of her seat. "No of course not sir!" She defended as she rushed to place her things away. "I was just off in wonderland today."
"Are you sure there is nothing distracting you?" He asked.
Yes.
"No," she replied hurriedly.
"You know you can tell me if something is," he reassured her.
Yes, of course. Let me just tell you about how you are distracting me by always wearing the hottest casual suits every lesson and giving me the wonderful fantasy of tearing it off you.
"I know that, it's just been my busy schedule," y/n lied through her teeth. She's a broke college student with hardly any friends or real other assignments. "I am just working really hard, you know?"
Yeah, working really hard to imagine you pounding me into next week!
With that last thought, y/n knew she needed to leave before she exploded with embarrassment and arousal right there in front of him.
"I just wanted to let you know that you are totally allowed to change the topic of the assignment if you feel like there is something that strikes a chord with you," Mr. Holland smiled brightly.
Fuck! Did he have to look so gorgeous even when he's trying to be dorky and supportive.
Mr. Holland noticed the shocked look upon y/n's face and immediately retracted his statement, "I promise I won't fail you, if that's what your thinking." He explained. "I really enjoy your work, you're a gifted woman with a real talent and I don't want to see it go to waste with my shitty assignment."
y/n turned her attitude around. He was stumbling over his words. It was kind of cute and endearing, like everything he does. She smiled warmly at his compliment.
"Sir," she spoke softly. It came out a lot mouseyer and somehow sexual than she would have liked but she refused to back out of her statement. "I can't wait."
She didn't say another word but simply slung her back over her shoulder and made her way out of the class. Tom followed her figure in complete and utter shock. He praised whatever god watched over him for the small mercy that was having y/n's back turned to him to witness his immediate blush cover his entire freckled face.
Tom never let his eyes leave her. He just watched her waltz right out of his classroom, he bit his lip at the sight of her perfectly cupped ass in her jeans. Through-out the entire lesson, all he could think about is how her tits would bounce as his dick thrusted up into her little cunt. Just the thought made his cock spring to life.
He stared up at the clock. He had to be in another lecture in 10 minutes, he had to teach another round of student without her pretty face in it in 10 bloody minutes. Sadly, it wasn't enough time to imagine cumming over her said face. He fidgeted until his painful erection was safely hidden.
God, you are such a fucking creep, Holland. He thought to himself.
━━★✼☆。
y/n really didn't want to be doing this.
She really didn't want to have to walk to the library in a mini skirt she had when she went through her cringy hoe phase and a low-cut tank top she only really wore to bed at 8 at night. Luckily before she left, her roommate gave her a full can of pepper spray and a pocketknife. A handle tool for when you looked like a prostitute.
She had no choice. It was laundry night and she had to get her assignment out of the way, or she would never finish it in time. She wanted to kick herself for letting laundry night fall on the only night the library stayed open until midnight. It was a perk for sure but not when you had nothing to wear but pink neon rags.
y/n pushed open the library door and relieved herself of the anxiety of being abducted by the greeting of Harry. He looked familiar but she couldn't pinpoint where she had seen his face before.
"What cha doing here?" he shouted. Quite contradictory for a librarian. y/n grinned when she saw his dorky face at the counter. That is until he caught wind of her outfit, or lack thereof. "Got a late shift at the strip-club after this?" Her face fell.
"I hate you," she played along, her arms slumping on the cold desk. y/n looked around the library. It was basically empty, with the exception of the middle-aged teacher grading a stack full of papers. Poor bastard, y/n thought. "Got one for me?"
"You're going to get me fired if I do this again," Harry huffed, he banged his head against the keyboard in frustration.
"This is the last time," y/n explained, "I pinkie promise." She lifted her hand over the counter and waved her pinkie finger in Harry's face. He stared up her than move his eyeline to her finger now just touching the tip of his nose. He groaned loudly as he took her finger in his.
"There is a ton of empty booths, choose one and don't make a sound," Harry told her angrily, y/n simply clapped her hands in celebration and skipped off. She chooses the booth in range of Harry, in hopes that maybe he will distracted her and she won't have to do her work because she's too busy goofing off.
y/n dropped her stuff in a huff. Her back slumped into the curve of the chair and the desk covered her body happily. She placed her earphones in and played her favourite study music. She was in absolute heaven.
The assignment was kicking her ass, but she was determined to do it. Mr. Holland seemed genuinely excited for what she would write about if she did decide to change the topic. Now though she's regretting not letting Mr. Holland's hopes down.
She could find hardly anything online and even if she did it was by some random SJW on Tumblr. That's what lead her here tonight. In hopes that maybe some privileged white asshole with a degree would have some sources sighted to help her. Unfortunately, she was having trouble with that too.
It was now 11:30pm. She had been at this god forsaken table for two and a half hours now in an endless pursuit of bullshit. y/n had half a mind to give up and just suck his dick for the grade like other girls would in this situation. y/n had to remind herself though, she is a gifted woman with a real talent that should not be wasted on something shitty to please the masses. Did she just quote Mr. Holland?
She caught eyes with Harry in her block, who had two pencils stuck up his nose in an attempt to cheer her up. It did for the most part. y/n wanted to play along but it had seemed someone else had walked through the door at that very moment and Harry threw the pencils out. Harry's face lit up with red upon the arrival of this mystery person. y/n was interested in who this mystery person was. That is until she saw his face.
Mr. Holland walked up to the library desk in a fit of laughter. His hands smacking the counter and his face contorted in a wide smile. y/n instantly ducked under the table. She could faintly hear their conversation. It just sounded like muffled words until her name popped up.
Jesus Christ. Not now. Not tonight. Why of all night to run into his must it have to be tonight. Maybe I should make a run for it now, bust out of the wind-
"I know you're under there y/n," Mr. Holland's voice sung above her. It was too late now. Any escape plan that her mind frantically tried to rationalise was long gone by this point. Slowly, y/n retreated from her hiding spot to face him. He had his normal outfit of a tight t-shirt paired with a decorative tie and slightly lose pants. This time though he had a long burgundy coat draped over his shoulders. He looked like a painting. y/n smiled sheepishly.
"Hi," she said simply. Regaining her seat from before and fully appearing in front of him. "I had no idea you would be here this late," she tried with conversation.
"Harry's my brother, I have to drive him home before leaving myself and he just wanted to work the late shift tonight," Tom laughed to himself and he turned around and waved at Harry. His brother waved back guiltily. "You know, I could say this same to you," he smirked at her.
"I am working on your assignment, sir," y/n responded quietly. Tom's eyes lit up at that and he rushed to snatch the papers off her desk and into his hands. Much to the disapproval of y/n.
"Oh good, you've decided to change it," Tom sounded almost relieved as if he trusted her judgement more than his own. Worse of it all, he decided to sit down next to her. Even taking off his coat, making his biceps bulge through his shirt. His eyes flicked through what she currently has. His eyebrows raised in shock, "I have to say, I was not expected you to decide to do something about the female orgasm and its effect on the psyche," his voice was an octave deeper than usual. y/n could feel her arousal building.
y/n couldn't decide if he was just being friendly or if he was trying to send a deeper message. Either way, she decided to take action. "Well, with the number of women being unsatisfied I thought it was an appropriate topic," she snatched the papers out of his hands, "but you wouldn't know anything about women being unsatisfied would you sir?"
Tom sat there in astonishment. His cock stiffened against the restraints of his jeans, he has only been in her vicinity for 5 minutes and already she has him hard as a rock. It was times like these that he wished he could just leave all his determination to fuck her over this very desk at the door. Regrettably, he couldn't.
"Well, that just ruins the surprise," y/n sighed delicately. Her fingers flicking through the pages of her useless book. "Either way, the resources are complete shit," this time her sadness was real, and Tom snapped out of his lust-ridden haze.
"Did you really expect a man to know mostly everything of something that is so cardinally female?" Tom smirked as he closed the book on her and pointed to the photo of a wrinkled old man. He was the author of a stupid book and to be fair, he looked like he would write this type of book as well.
"Damn, I knew I was doing something wrong," y/n hissed. She had been spending her entire night trying to piece together information from a man who can only give her half the story.
"The book on the top shelf is one on the chemical effects of orgasming in females by a female," Tom leaned in and whispered in her ear. His hot breath wafted of her skin; it was enough to send goose bumps over her entire body. y/n turned her head to face him, their lips inches away from each other. If they didn't have Harry watching them like a hawk, they probably would be out of breath from lip-locking. Instead, y/n nodded and got up out of her seat, making sure to give him a stunning view of her tits through her tank top. He wanted to audibly gasp but kept in inside. It didn't help with his situation downstairs any more than the last few minutes have.
Slowly, she walked over to the bookcase. Her eyes scanning the endless rows and she made sure Tom had enough time to enjoy the deep red thong underneath her skirt. Finally, her fingers coiled around the book and brought it down to her. Tom couldn't believe his own eyes. He was so under her spell. The way her top hugged her curved and let his eyes completely drink in her breasts. How her skirt was pulled up to her waist, allowing the flushed skin of her ass to be visible to him. He wonders how a woman like her even exists and yet she takes a seat next to him, absolutely unaware of his throbbing manhood. Begging to be touched by her, to be taken by her, by anything to do with her.
"Thank you, sir," she almost purrs to him, Tom's struggling to keep it together. He afraid the next thing to slip out of her flawless mouth, he'll cum straight into his pants when he would rather cum into her.
"Anytime," he responds just a dark before getting up. Hiding his clearly hard cock behind his briefcase. "I'll see you in class?" He already knows the answer, but he just wants the last bit of assurance from her.
"Of course," she smiled warmly. With that Tom basically books it, he's frantically making sure he's well-hidden as he quickly bends over the counter.
"I'll come back to pick you up in 30, I forgot some paper work back in my office," it's so fast, Harry almost doesn't have time to translate it before Tom's out the door and rushing down the hall.
At one point, he basically running to get to his office. Feet tapping against the concrete as he continues to see nothing but flashing images of y/n. It blurs his vision and he's so desperate. He considers using a spare supply closet but know he will only get complete privacy in his own office.
He finally gets there, after what seems like an eternity of running. He checks the hallways before entering. He drops all of his things at the foot of the door. He even has the decency to hang his coat upon the rack. Tom slowly walks over to his chair. It's a rough leather material and usually he would refuse to do what he's about to do in here, it will be stained with the memory but at this point. He got no fucks left to give.
He crashes down. His back hitting the material he hates so much. He doesn't think he's got time, but he still does it slowly. His belt drops next to his and he undoes the zip slowly and the cold air hits his dick. He hisses at the feeling but proceeds anyways. Tom pulls the rest of his jeans and boxers down his legs and kicks them across the room. His hand takes his dick, slowly rubbing the head. Imaging y/n's fingers dancing over it, spreading the precum over. He uses his palm to envision her own stroking up and down in an even motion. He can't help but moan. He can't help but softly call out her name.
He so entranced that he doesn't recognize the following light footsteps approaching. He's so into her non-existent touch that he doesn't hear the door peacefully squeak open. He's so in love with the feeling he doesn't feel y/n walk around the room to get on her knees in front of him.
She's in glory of his movements. Watching him stroke his much bigger cock than her masturbation version has her in a hurry to get her own panties off her body and across the floor. She's sure she's dripping onto the wood below but she does have single care in the world. Tom has his head thrown back in ecstasy as his hand starts to speed up, that's when y/n decides to go for the kill. She licks a long strip up his shaft. Her hands stabilizing him by placing them atop his bare thighs.
Tom almost jumps out of his chair. He had no idea she caught him in the middle of something so vile and wrong. Better yet, she had caught him with the tip of his dick around her perfectly glossed lips. He doesn't get to say another word before y/n's hands begin massaging the bottom of his manhood. It's slow to begin with, it's almost if she's easing him into it. Her cheeks hollow out to allow his length into her warm mouth. It's incredible. Tom can't help but buck his hips up into her throat causing her to gag slightly. It's a sound he wants more of.
His hands ball her hair into his fist. With the faster her movements become, the harder he fucks into her mouth. They sync up almost instantly. One of y/n's hands leave his cock to fuck herself. Tom's mesmerised by the way her fingers act as a replacement for his dick. He's certain he's not going to last much longer.
"I should be d-doing that," he whispers through grunts. y/n lifts her head to smile at him, still letting her free hand jerk and pull bringing him closer the edge.
"I know," she responds, just as quiet. Her mouth reconnects but Tom quickly snaps his hips up into her. Her muffled moaning vibrated against his cock as he fucks her mouth. It's the hottest thing he's ever done. He tugs and pulls at her hair, y/n's edging him on. She's exquisite, it's like she's mastered this and has allowed him to chance to feel how fucking beautiful her little mouth can be.
Like it's effortless, he comes. Without any warning, he is shooting hot stream of cum into her mouth, filling it up. Tom swears he's seeing stars but can't bring him to call out her name but instead bites down on his hand so hard he's afraid he's drawn blood.
y/n releases him from her mouth and is from an actual porn Tom spent his teenage years watching, his cum leaks from her lips and falls down on the curves of her tits. It's a sight he was to remember forever. He wants to grab his phone and click so he will get to look at her covered in his cum for the rest of his life but alas, he's still regaining his bearings.
"Tastes better than I would have expected," y/n giggles as she brings the liquid back up to her lips and swallows. There is no way this woman gets better; he thinks to himself.
"Sweetheart-," he begins but she beats him to it, her gets back on her feet and plants a sweet kiss upon his lips. He can taste himself on her lips, it's addictive.
"I wanted this," it's almost as if she read his mind. He doesn't respond but he simply looks at her, his hand coming up to twirl a strand of hair that has fallen in front of her face.
y/n pulls away from him, walking over the pile of discarded clothes and bend to pick up her soaked underwear. She gives Tom a look, he's so close he can smell her juices from his seat. Her pussy look like a paradise waiting to be exploded by him, but he keeps his hands to himself. y/n paced herself over to the coat hanger, her folded panties in hand. She places them in the left pocket with a devilish smile upon her face. Tom had now place their rest of his clothes back on and had joined her.
"I'll get them back next lesson," y/n grins. Tom nods quickly, their feet fumbling under her back hits his office door. She's trapped in between him, he smells of pure sex but she's committed to her idea. He bends down to capture her lips in his with a forceful kiss. It's hungry and needy. She wants it so badly to give but she pulls away. "My roommate is waiting for me outside."
"We'll finish this," Tom whispers as he opens the door for her. It sends shivers down y/n's spine. It's not a promise, it's an order.
She grabs the rest of her things and heads off. Almost in a sick turn of events, Tom watches her bare ass strut away from him. Just like the last lesson, except this time all he can do is imagine him face fucking her. It's a beautiful sight.
━━★✼☆。
The three days leading up to class where probably the slowest 72 hours both of them had ever experienced. A constant detail of pleasure from the night before. So when the fated day arrived, both parties didn't know what to do. Tom debated just staying home, though he couldn't deny he so desperately want just another taste. He thought, if he didn't show up, all his guilty conscience of a student giving him the best head he's ever had in his life would simply disappear and he would go back to being a normal teacher. y/n, too, thought of skipping this class for a completely different reason. Perhaps she had got a surge of confidence after hearing her professor call out her name while he touched himself or it could just be the pure scandalous nature of it all. Either way, she wanted to stay cooped up with a blanket while she watched him unravelled. No matter the psyche from the both of them, they went.
y/n stood outside the classroom for a good 20 minutes, unsure of what she should do. Should she go in now and fuck him in the small window or wait and play with his emotions? She hadn't realised how fast the time had went until she saw other student's start entering. It was now or never and unfortunately it was going to be now.
The room was smaller than y/n remember when she stepped in. It seemed more wide the last time she came in here. Of course, the last time she came in her, she hadn't sucked Mr. Holland's cock.
Her eyes landed on him in a matter of seconds. His back was turned to her as he wrote on the massive blackboard in front of him. y/n could see his muscles flex as he tried to reach for the duster above the board. She bit her lip as she thought of her nails digging into his back as he fucked her. It was a fantasy she had to push to the side.
Tom could practically smell her once she walked in. It was her normal perfume that had been intensified 10 fold. He refuses to turn around, afraid that if he did all his good heart nature would go out the window. Tom could hear the faint clinking of the heels of her shoes walk up the stairs. He so desperately wanted them to come right back down.
"Okay, as you know, you're assignment is due in 2 weeks and this is going to be the only time I will answer your questions," Tom's voice boomed. He hadn't got a lot of sleep since that night and he didn't particularly want to do this but he considered himself a kind professor, so he had too.
He turned around and saw the entire class' hands go straight up in the air. Including y/n, though hers was a little lower. Her eyebrow raised and a small smirk painted on her lips. There was no way in hell he was answer whatever question came out of those pretty lips. She looked even more exquisite than when he last saw her. A tight t-shit that had a stained 50's logo on it and a pair of tight black jeans, he knew as soon as he spoke to her, he would loose all control on himself.
So he never did, constantly dodging her. Answering every single question, even if half of them were if he was married or worse if he was free Friday night. He will admit, seeing y/n get frustrated every time he passed her to talk to another young female student made him just that tad bit excited.
It was an hour and a half of pure tension. Sure, no one else in the class could feel it but they 100% could. She never felt more out of control and for some reason, she despised it. He kept ignoring her, kept refusing her, kept defying her. It was infuriating, that she wanted to take fate by the hair.
She waited, until every single soul had walked out of the door. She waited until the last gaggle of girls had finished their blabbering to Tom before she starting to strut down the stairs. Tom refused to meet her eyes even when he knew that's all she did. Glare at him as she stomped past him desk to the classroom door. He heard it lock.
"I wanted to ask you a question," she almost spat, "sir."
Tom straightened himself before swivelled around to meet her. She was so livid with him but he knew deep down that all she wanted from him was to have the white chalk from the board rubbed up her back from him pinning her down.
"Fire away," he responded exactly the same. She stared at him for a moment before strolling towards him. She made sure to swing her hips every other time. She noticed his eyes on her, finally she was getting somewhere.
y/n pressed her chest upon his heaving one. Her face lifting to meet his. They stayed like that for a good minute, just pondering. They listened to each other's heats thumping against their rib cages. They both desperately needed this.
Never taking her eyes off him, y/n snaked her hand around the side of pocket of her coat, smiling once she found what she left. Her soaked red thong, it was a sight for sore eyes.
"I wanted to ask if I was every going to get payback?" she giggled softly. Tom knew she was playing a game but he had no idea which one it was.
"I don't think I understand," he stammered, she strutted away from him until she met the edge of his stainless desk. Her fingers gliding over the wood ever so slightly. She turned her head to look at him. She had a rawness in her eyes; lustful, a sinner's stare. It would be a look Tom was never forget for the rest of his life.
y/n suddenly jumped on the desk. Her ass moving the papers to the side as she slowly started to unbutton her tight jeans. "I think you do," it was almost a hiss but he only heard the desperation in her voice. "I want you to make me feel all the things you did that night."
Tom almost fainted just with that until she dropped her jeans the floor. She had come to class without any underwear on and her wetness was dripping onto the desk. Tom was sure was in heaven but he didn't want to believe it.
He got on his knees. His hands palming at her soft thighs. Tom didn't need another incentive, he didn't need another spur-on. Tom licked a single strip up her folds, y/n bit a moan back. It was like tasting ambrosia or doing cocaine for the first time. He needed more, so he went back in again, this time it was rougher. His fingers gripping at her ass, pulling her closer to his mouth as he devoured as if he hadn't eaten in weeks. Her hands tangle themselves in his floppy curls, she tugs harshly on his scalp as he adds a finger into her warm entrance.
Tom's never felt like this before but he doesn't care. He's sure people can hear her soft but frantic moaning from outside, but he doesn't care. He'll never look at his desk the same way but like everything else, he doesn't fucking care. Tom curls his fingers in the perfect spot inside of her.
"Just like that," y/n calls out, her hair now sprawled out on the desk. "I'm going to cum sir."
Tom feels her walls contract around his fingers as he pulsing faster, her back arches and she trying so hard to force her cries back into her throat. It's a sight he wants to from above, it's a feeling he wants to feel inside of her. So, at the last minute, he retracts everything. His tongue leaves her throbbing clit and his finger, which are glistening with her slick, slid out of her.
y/n can't hold back to whine that leaves her left from the loss of his god-like tongue and fingers. "What the fuck Tom?!" she's angry with him, she wants to tell him off but before she can do it. One of his hands captures her wrist and slams them against the desk below her, pinning her to it. She whimpers at the sting of pain.
He's right above her but she can't see a single thing below her. "Look at me," he tells her sternly, she does what's she is told instantly. "You can't talk to me like that sweetness," y/n knows there is a venom behind his words even if she speaks in a melody. "I'm not your fucking boyfriend, you don't call me that."
Without any warning at all, he pounds right up into her. y/n almost spasms out of Tom's grip from the wave of pleasure. Tom doesn't move at all, he stays nuzzled inside her. It's agonising, almost painful for y/n. Having his perfect cock not jamming into her tight cunt. It's torture.
"You understand that?" he peppers kissed against the nape of her neck, she's about to cry out, she'll do anything. She nods her head frantically, hoping it's enough. It isn't. He keeps his hips locked tightly against hers. "Words, sweetness."
"Yes," she responds. She can feel him frown against her skin. He pulls right out of her and rams right back in, causing y/n to scream out in pleasure. "Y-yes sir," she corrects herself and with that, Tom starts a pace. It's slow and tantalising, he watches amazed at how her pretty folds swallow him up with every thrust. It's magnificent.
He wants to savour this moment forever. He wants to fuck her brains out for every waking moment of his existence.
"Sir, go harder," she moans below him. Her wrists bruised from his gripped, but the pain just only contributes in her overwhelming amount of pleasure. His thick cock is so much better than her fingers, no matter how many she adds.
Tom obliges and starts to really pound into her cunt. It's raw and ruthless, he's calling out her name now. "Fuck sweetness, you so bloody tight," he purrs, y/n can't respond through her chant of curses. "You're little cunt was made for me, it was made for me to stretch it out."
The dirty talk elevates her, y/n's not sure how much longer she'll last. His filling ever last inch of her. She can feel her tits bounce every time their skin collides. Her wrists are finally let free as he begins to clutch at her naked hips. It's an experience she's never felt. The sound of skin slapping and their combined gasping and cursing are the only thing she can perceive to hear. If there was a knock at the door, y/n knows she would have no idea about it.
Perhaps, it's the pure excitement and morality of this whole situation that makes them both feel like they're on cloud nine. Her arms snake around his waist, her hands move with every rough thrust into her. She's gripping onto his back through the material of his tight shirt. Her nails clasping on the contracting muscles. She would have left his back red and sore if he didn't have the damned t-shirt on to protect him.
"Fuck," she curses as he started to hit an area inside of her, she never knew existed. "Just like that sir, I am going to cum," she moans, her forehead against his. They lock eyes again, this time though there is no linger feeling of want or romance. It's just sex. Dirty, hot, intense fucking.
She's the first to come undone. The fire now transformed into a raging wildfire spreading across her entire abdomen. y/n throws her head back in ecstasy, her whole vision goes black and she has to bit down against her hand to stop and inevitable pornographic scream to jump out of her mouth. Her other hand clutches his neck, pulling him closer to her.
Tom follows shortly after, his thrusts become sloppy and erratic but never easing up. His cock twitches inside of her before he shots the hot white liquid all inside of her cunt. He pressed his lips against her as his attempt to stop his moan as well but he continues to call out her angelic name against her lips. Once, Tom pulls out of her, he watches in awe. The mixture leaks out of her hole and then pools on his desk. He's so in love with this woman it hurts.
"I have never cum that hard in my entire fucking life," she giggles, pulling her top down her flushed tits. As he too, starts to redress himself, he simply stares at her. Watches her retrieve her jeans from the floor and slip them up her bare ass. He spots her shove her panties back into his back pocket, not before she scribbles something down on a torn piece of paper.
"What are you doing?" he asked gently, wrapping his arms around her waist. She nuzzles her face in the crook of her.
"I'm giving you a reason to come make me dinner and then fuck me again," she explains, "I put my address in there, so hopefully you can't get lost."
"You sure about this," Tom asked hesitantly, y/n now swivelled around to face him. Her warm palm caressed his face.
"I wouldn't have just done that if I wasn't," she places a soft, tender kiss to his cheek. "Make it a Thursday though, my roommate will be out on those nights," she told him as he grabbed the last of her things and unlocked the door. Tom grins warmly as she makes herself presentable for the last time. "I would clean that up if I were you," y/n laughed, pointing at the obvious mess all over his desk before quickly exiting.
As she wobbled back to her dorm, she wondered what article of clothing she should leave out on their next escapade.
━━★✼☆。
a/n: this is gonna flop, i just fuckin know it 🥴 anways i hope you enjoyed my fic that has ended my hiatus. see you (hopefully) soon 🥺
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what-i-call-men · 3 years ago
Text
Together at last
Winter Anderson x female! Reader
Request: nope!
Warnings: a lot of cult talk, homophobia from Kai, minor drug use (marijuana), mentioned cheating (for the sake of the cult) and SMUT at the end with Winter.
Picture from @copy-of-a-cheeto
Proof reading by @divineruler
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You had met Winter in college. You two had been roommates and quickly spent all your time together, soon starting to date. You had come from a pretty accepting place, whereas Winter was not in the same boat as you. When you two first started dating, you chose to keep it off social media and keep it to yourself because her brother and parents were pretty crazy. When she went back home for breaks you stayed at school or went to your own family. There were even a few years she came to your family's house for holidays.
After the two of you graduated, she opted to move back home with her family, which you ended up moving only a few minutes away in a small apartment. You loved being around Winter too much to just move away from her, so instead you put your English Literature degree to work here. You got to see her every couple days, usually walking around the town or finding some restaurant to sit in together. The two of you were quite a pair, her the dark but more feminine one where as you wore lighter colors but were more into masculine clothes, being taller than her and only accentuating that with big shoes or how you carried yourself in general.
When Winter was finally comfortable, she invited you to her family home for a sleepover about a month into you two staying there. She told you that she'd keep it under the ruse that you were her best friend and roommate from college but nothing more. You agreed, feeling it'd be best for Winter to be safe over however you felt. It had definitely been a bit harder for her to want to invite you especially after seeing how her brother reacted to the election. But when she finally said it'd be safe to have you over, you left your house quickly. Pulling up to the house, you had tried your best to dress as straight as possible, wearing a pair of leggings and a baggy pink shirt just to be on the safe side.
You barely made it to the door before it was opened by a man with long dark blue hair and a judgmental stare. He was about the same height as you if you were to stand up straight and if you had anything other than converse on for shoes you'd probably tower over him. Yet something told you not to try to intimidate him back, this was Winter's brother that you had to impress. "Hey, I'm here to see Winter. I'm y/n." You said and stuck your hand out to shake his. He didn't shake your back but instead a hand grabbed yours from behind him, one you instantly recognized as your girlfriend. "Kai let her in, this is my friend and I'd prefer you left her and I alone." Winter nudged him to the side with her hip as you walked past him into the house.
After spending some time in her room, smoking, listening to some music, and eventually making out after ordering some pizza delivery. You had remembered her locking the door behind you two because she had made a point of it, but when she moved on top of you, you opened your eyes to look at her and saw the door cracked open and a mop of blue hair through the doorway. Your eyes widened and Winter turned around to see her brother. "Winter, your pizza is here." He only said that before retreating back down the stairs and to what you assumed was the basement Winter has mentioned.
After getting some slices and eventually smoking away some more of Winter's stress about her brother, you offered to get you two some drinks which she agreed and you went downstairs by yourself. As you were filling the cups, you heard the door close to the basement. You glanced over and saw Kai standing against the counter. "So you’re the lesbo my sister is dating? You know she really isn't gay and she's just faking it." He said, very obviously trying to upset you and provoke you. You pursed your lips.
"First off I'm not a lesbian, I'm bisexual. Second off, faking it? You mean all the girls that you fuck... oh wait Winter told me you're an incel who gets off to girls feet on the internet." You said and straightened your back a bit, now leaning a bit over his slouching frame. Honestly he wasn't bad looking and the way he stared at you with hate but some underlying impression, wow you must really just like the Anderson's. Now you just had to see Winter's oldest brother to see if looks just ran in the family.
"Winter said she can't fucking stand you and that you really needs a proper boyfriend to show you that you like dick over whatever is in your pants." Kai said and crossed his arms, obviously getting a bit more upset that you weren't taking any of his insults to heart, but somehow he resulted in just kinda flirting... or maybe that was supposed to be threatening.
"Oh what's in my pants? You mean your sister? Now run along little man, don't pick fights you won't win." You said and rolled your eyes before walking up the stairs to Winter's room, telling her little to none of what happened downstairs. She obviously would be upset by it if she knew what you said and what her brother said. It was a normal night otherwise. You went home the next morning, not really expecting to see Winter so soon again when she texted you a few hours later and said Kai wanted you to come over.
This time you wore a normal outfit and didn't try to look "straight". When you go to the house, Winter silently opened the door and nodded to you to walk towards the basement. "He wants to talk to you. Don't fight with him please." She whispered as you got to the open door. You walked down the stairs and saw her brother sitting at a table with two chairs. "What am I gonna get interrogated?" You asked as you sat down in the chair across from him.
"No. I like your strength. I think you and I could help each other out." He said and crossed his arms. "Y/n I know you like my sister, and I know in this town there's not many accepting people... of relationships like yours." Kai said and leaned to the table and extended his pinky. You couldn't help but chuckle a bit at the fact that he was the one you were worried about, not others. "I want you to take my pinky." He said and you hesitated, but he quickly raised his voice and stated "do it." And you did.
He asked you all sorts of questions, and you chose to be honest because quite frankly you were just an honest person. He asked about what you fear. Hurting Winter. He asked what made you like his sister. Easy, everything but more specifically how hot she was in bed, also how fun it was to sneak around with each other in college. He asked what made you realize it wasn't just women you liked. Another easy one, your boyfriend right before Winter was really good in bed. After Kai unlocked his pinky from yours you furrowed your brows. "So why do you think I can 'help you'." You asked.
"I think you'd be able to benefit from helping me. You help me run for city council, write my speeches and make sure I sound well spoken. In return I promise you and Winter safety and a life together." He said and crossed his arms. As much as you wanted to laugh in his face at the idea of him on city council, you bit your tongue. "What is it that you can do to keep us safe? If she didn't move back into this house she would be living with me safely in somewhere like West Hollywood." You said and furrowed your brows at him.
"Well I heard that your poor innocent girlfriend has had some things to do with the few people around here that have been murdered... and I'd hate for my poor sister or her... accomplice to be tipped off to the police." This was the first you'd heard about this... but somehow with Kai being the way he was you didn't doubt what he said and the validity behind it. "So, we make a deal, you write my speeches and you and Winter stay here safely." You had no choice but to agree.
A few weeks into this situation, you had barely spent any time with Winter other than at Kai's meetings. Instead you were tasked with getting close to Ally and keeping her under wraps. You also had to convince her that separating from Ollie and Ivy was a good idea for her. Although you were fully aware of Winter doing the same to Ivy, something felt so wrong when Ally became a bit more than emotionally attached. After Ally had made a move on you, and you just accepted it, you snuck back to the Anderson house and immediately shook off the gross feeling as soon as you walked inside.
Kai sat at the dining room table and winter was probably with Ivy and Ollie somewhere. "How'd it go?" Kai asked as he ate off of the plate he had before him. "I feel disgusting. She is so not my type and I need to go wash her off." You muttered and slid your jacket off. "How about we go down stairs and you tell me about it?" Kai offered and you really had no choice but to agree, if you didn't you were scared he'd become upset at you.
This loyalty and willingness to sleep your way through your jobs, and with Kai if he so pleased, got you a lot of attention from him. Really all you wanted was to get back to Winter, but you had to do so with Kai's permission. When you had finally been given a night to be with Winter alone, you two found yourselves making out in her bedroom. Your hands slid up under her shirt as she kicked off her shoes from the day. You lifted her shirt up and began to work on her bra as she undid your jeans.
After you were both down to your underwear, you lifted her up into your arms and gently laid her on the bed, crawling on top of her. As you kissed your girlfriend deeply, you couldn't help but feel so excited to finally have her in your arms again. You slowly began your descent down her neck and chest. You paused to remove her bra and leave a few kisses along her breasts. You always loved how responsive Winter was, especially when you two had paper thin walls to the dorm beside you and you'd have them knocking on your door to shut up or angry notes to stop 'having boys over'.
When you finally made your way to her core, you slid off her panties as you knelt on the ground beside the bed, booking your arms around her thighs and upping her to the edge. Delving in, you could've sworn Winter almost passed out. You two were very open with each other about everything you'd done for the cult, including who you had been forced to sleep with. Ally, Kai, and a few of the henchmen weren't as good as Winter and lord knows Ivy couldn't satisfy Winter like you did. Which is why Winter's legs were shaking so quickly then soon clenching around your head as she came on your tongue.
Getting back on top of her, she whispered something against your shoulder. "What's up babe?" You asked softly and turned a bit so you could barely hear her ask for you to sit on her face. You gladly agreed, standing off the bed to pull off your own bra and underwear, she sat up and leaned forward to gently grab and lick your nipples, giving small punches and kisses as you removed your underwear. God she was so gentle yet confident, she was so perfect. Even more perfect when you finally were positioned above her face and she dove in.
Her tongue worked wonders on your clit as she slid off the rings from her fingers before sliding the newly bare fingers into your dripping core. You held yourself above her, gently letting your hands roam down her cunt, gently rubbing her clit while you rolled your hips against her tongue. Within a few moments you were on the edge of cumming and winter worked you over the edge. You felt so good to finally have a welcomed orgasm. "I wanna fuck you." She whispered up at you as you came down from your high and you smiled at her a bit. She slid out from under you and ran to her closet as you laid back on her bed.
After a few moments of struggling she pulled the straps of the strapon onto herself. No one would guess you were a bottom to her if they saw you on the street together, but somehow if just worked for you two. She climbed back on the bed as she slid the dildo into place on her belt, turning on the bullet that sat on the inside for herself. Leaning down, winter sucked one of your nipples gently into her mouth as she ran her fingers gently against your clit, rubbing it as she slid the dick into you slowly. You groaned out softly as she made her way up to your lips, kissing you deeply as she began thrusting into you.
With her thrusts and rubbing your clit, and her the vibrations on herself, both of you were quickly close to the edge. Her moans were getting higher and more whiny, you reaching up and gently playing with her breasts. As she leaned over you to speed up her thrusts, you took a nipple into your own mouth, licking and sucking gently, her own thrusts becoming sloppy. "Fuck... babe... fuck I'm close baby." She mined out and you nodded up at her, letting her know you were too. After just a few more thrusts and rubbing a bit harder against your clit, you two were both topping over the edge, letting out a long moan of your own as she whimpered against your neck.
After a couple seconds of breathing, she got up to remove everything from herself. You pulled her back down to the bed before you two could clean up. "I love you." You whispered to her quietly as you pulled her naked body against yours. She whispered her own back to you before taking a deep breath. "I wanna marry you." She whispered softly as your hand traveled up to cup her cheek. You two looked at each other in silence for a moment. "I want you to myself. I wanna run away and marry you and hide away from this stupid cult life. Please marry me." Winter whispered to you and you smiled at her softly. "If we can find a way out, I'd love to marry you." You said back and pulled her into a soft kiss, before hearing the door slam downstairs, basically saying your alone time was up and Kai was home.
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caker-baker · 4 years ago
Text
The Job Hunt
The hero groaned, letting the newspaper drop onto the floor. That was the third ad for a job this week, and the eleventh rejection this month.
It wasn’t necessarily their fault that their hours were somewhat weak. How could they know when disaster would strike at the hands of the villain?
Stupid, stupid, villain. If they could work out a set schedule, then maybe, just maybe, the hero might be able to hold a steady job. But for now, free lance writing and construction work was all they could do, and it didn’t always pay well.
They swiped the newspaper off the floor, ready to crumple it and hurl it into the garbage can, but then they noticed another ad. A fourth description for a job that had escaped the hero’s eye.
An assistant type job, one to fill in if the other couldn’t make it.
The hero chewed on their lip. Filling in would probably be flexible hours, and there was already another assistant there, making it more of a codependent job than anything. It seemed perfect, and the hero’s last choice.
So there they were, in front of a large and imposing building, clutching the ad in hand.
It was like any other interviewing process, though - a greeting at a front desk, a brief waiting period, then a hiring manager. A hiring manager who shook the hero’s hand, who agreed with the hero’s terms of odd hours, who set up the hero’s first day of training.
They couldn’t believe it. It was so easy. Maybe they wouldn’t have sore limbs after construction jobs and fighting the villain, maybe they wouldn’t need to stay up so late just to finish one freelance assignment. They were getting ahead of themselves, but the thought of decent pay and a semi-stable schedule was exciting after all this time.
When the first training day came, the hero could hardly contain their excitement. If the villain chose to be a menace today, the other assistant would apparently be there. This job was a miracle, a breath of fresh air for the hero.
The fresh air was quickly polluted when the hero entered the imposing building. No, not just imposing, but empty, as opposed to a few days prior when the hero saw a place bustling with working life. Too perfect. It must’ve been some shady corporation that already skipped town, which was why they were ok with the hero’s strange work conditions, they didn’t expect to be there long.
Dejected, the hero turned to leave, only to find an automatic door sealed shut. Eyes narrowed, the hero backed away from the door. Too perfect.
Was it all a large setup to rob someone blind? Or was there something more sinister going on?
The hero didn’t like reckless destruction if they could help it, but this time couldn’t be helped. With a quick breath, the hero charged towards the door, ready to knock it down, but four hands stopped them abruptly.
Two hands were placed on each arm, and the hero pushed forward immediately, their concentration focusing on escaping.
It was surprisingly hard to get out of someone’s grip, especially when they were behind you, and you couldn’t see what weak points you could attack. They kicked wildly behind them, trying to get the sudden attackers to release them.
“Stop struggling.” A cold voice hissed. “Or I’ll have them kill you.” The voice lied.
The hero shuddered. They did stop, but only becuase they recognized the icy voice, they had fought the owner of that voice several times over.
The hero prayed that the villain didn’t recognize them, that the villain thought they were a civilian, someone they could just take as a hostage.
“Turn them around.” The villain commanded the henchmen. “I want to see if there’s a resemblance.”
Though the hero jerked, the henchmen held tight, giving the villain full view of the hero.
The villain squinted, tilting their head at the hero, who was struggling for words.
What would a civilian say? What would a civilian say? What would a civilian say?
“Yo-” the hero began. They didn’t need to fake the fear that laced their tone, that was genuine. “You’re Villain.”
“Obviously.” The villain murmured, still squinting. “And am I wrong to assume you’re hero?”
“If I was hero,” They started. “Wouldn’t I be able to escape?”
“Normally, yes.” The villain agreed, strolling closer to the hero. “But I think if our hero was tired enough, unprepared enough, they would be off their game, allowing themselves to be snatched up.” They squinted again. “You’d think it’d be easier to tell even without a mask.”
What would a civilian do? What would a civilian do? What would a civilian do?
“I-I’m not her-hero.” They swallowed, watching the villain’s eyes trail their captured form. “I thought-I thought I was getting a job.”
“I know.” The villain nearly rolled their eyes, but didn’t, choosing to keep exploring the hero. “That’s what I was counting on.” The villain’s voice dropped suddenly. “It should be right here.”
The villain grabbed the hero’s arms ferociously, ripping at the long sleeve which covered the hero’s trailing scar. A scar the villain had made.
“And what’s this from?” The villain asked, waving the henchmen off of the hero, effectively releasing them into the villain’s grasp. Delicately, they trailed a finger up and down the scar.
“I-” the hero had excuses lined up for people who asked. “I was in a car accident.”
Still holding fast to the hero, the villain chuckled, trailing their gaze to the hero’s ear. Carefully, they moved a strand of hair, revealing another scar created by the villain.
“And this one?”
“What do you want from me?” The hero was almost sobbing. They were normally prepared for the villain, something this elaborate wasn’t like their nemesis, it was unexpected, unpreparable.
“Oh,” the villain tutted. “None of that now.” They twirled the hero around, trapping them against their chest. They were delighted with the hero’s shivering breaths.
“If you were in such a press for cash, you could’ve come to me.” They lowered their head to the hero’s scarred ear. “I would move mountains to help you, darling.”
Trying their hardest to calm themselves, the hero spoke. “I was busy trying to stop you from killing people.”
Another chuckle. “So sure of yourself. Wouldn’t you like to stop all the construction, every little side gig?”
The hero froze. If the villain knew that, that meant the villain had been spying on them, suspecting their secret identity for who knows how long.
“Barely scraping by, poor thing.”
When the hero made to jerk away from the villain, they heard the sudden cocking of a weapon.
“When’s the last time you got a good night’s rest?”
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oneirataxiahiraeth · 4 years ago
Note
Hey darling, i was wondering if i can have a request with ron weasley x reader. They start 7th year, the first morning of class she is getting ready with the girls (Hermione and ginny are her roomates) and she realized she packed her 5th year skirt and not the new one, she wears it anyways but its a little too short like to the mid thigh, the boys are always whistlering at her, looking at her legs and throwing "compliments". Ron doesn't like it, it makes him a little insecure but she reminds him she only loves him and she is only him's
I loveeee this concepttt, and I hope you like it<3
Promise?
Pairings : fem!reader x Jealous!RonWeasely
Warnings : Language, jealous Ron, catcalls, unprotected sex, oral (m.), classroom quickie, not proof read
Word count : something over 4K
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You were totally going to flip out.
You spent so long making sure you had everything packed for the semester and here you were. It was frustrating to you, how could you miss this? This skirt was a size and a half too small, the most you moved the wrong way your whole asscheek would've been on the newsletters front page.
"It doesn't look that bad, it's wearable." Ginny stated, genuinely not finding a problem in you skirt as she brush through her red locks. "Besides you definitely have the legs for it." She tried to cheer you up as you stared at yourself in the body length mirror.
It's was your first day of year 7 and you were already off to a bad start. You wore this exact skirt on this exact day 2 years ago. You had grown since then, you were no longer a child, yet somehow you still managed to squeeze yourself right into this god awful skirt. It stopped down right at your mid thigh, and to say this was out of your comfort zones would be an understatement. You were on the verge of just deciding not to show up for classes today. Though you knew Hermione was never going to let that actually happen.
"You think I'd get away with it?" You pouted, and both of the girls nodded.
"You look like some of the muggle girls I see back home. They have interesting taste, personally I'd never pull it off, but you do, very well." Hermione spoke in hopes to cheer you up.
It didn't work very well.
"And if anyone asks just say you're making a fashion statement." Gin spoke, sending the idea through your head for only moment before you shook it out.
"No one makes fashion statements at Hogwarts... it's basically forbidden." You whined, stomping your foot on the ground.
"Says who?"
"It's an unspoken rule amongst like... everyone." You sighed in response.
Ginny rolled her eyes, standing from the edge of her bed. It was time to head for breakfast and meet up with the boys. You've been rambling about this since you got back to campus. You had yet to see Ronald, and you were overly ecstatic to see his beautiful face yet again. He and Harry sent you letters all summer long but you were busy doing things back in your hometown. You wanted to sneak out last night, but the two of you agreed on the morning. Besides, most of your classes were together, including your off period meaning you too got to do whatever you pleased for a whole hour. What's not exciting about that?!
"We have to get going soon, y/n. I'm hungry, and Hermione is halfway out the door already." Ginny spoke, grabbing you bag from off the floor as well. "No one is going to notice, you look fine." She reassured you. "And if anyone says anything about my sister-in-law we will be having some words." She smiled sweetly making your cheeks hot.
"Me and Ron aren't even married." You fought back you smiled as you took your bag from the girl. She was basically like the little sister you've always wanted. "And after today I might die of embarrassment, so we never will be."
"I think you look great. Now. Can we go?" Hermione stood, ready to start her day.
"Ugh, fine." You groan, both of the girls smiling widely at you. "But I'm only giving myself until 3 class before I started sobbing." You sighed as Hermione took your hand in hers. Leading you to the door.
"Please, you won't make it past snap me if he sees you in the hallway." Ginny scoffed, your eyes widening as you realized she was right.
"What if he dress codes me? Or all the teachers think I'm a whore? Oh god, I'm going to get kicked out-"
"Y/N! You're skirts not even that short, and I was talking about you holding in tears!" Ginny sighed, closing the room down behind the 3 of you.
You couldn't help it, you were on a rollercoaster of emotions up all the way to the dining hall. That's where the lot of your friends stood in the halls catching up and sending you sweet smiles and took you how good you looked. You're cheeks were burning hot, and the compliment made you want to curl up into a ball.
"Look, there they are!" Hermione spoke, pointing to the two boys, already digging into the food on their plates. You noticed the extra cup of juice and muffin on Ron's plate, he saved it just for you, knowing how uneasy your stomach is in the mornings.
A bright smile formed on your face as you began making your way towards your boyfriend. Your smile slowly faded as loud group of ravenclaw boys in the corner of the cafeteria sent loud whistle noises through the air. Your eyes went to them immediately before you noticed their sights set on you. Ron's head turned slowly too, not very interested in whatever poor girl they were harassing until his gaze was set on you.
His jaw nearly dropped to the floor. You looked beautiful, as you always did. You were walking with that smile you do when your uncomfortable, and your finger freshly manicured fingers gripping the strap of your book bag. You were dressed in your regular uniform, except when you scanned you over his eyes got stuck on the length of your legs. They were nice, they looked warm, and comfortable. He's see your legs before though, he's seen each of your boys part very close and intimately before but, now everyone was seeing what was usually reserved for his eyes only.
"People are staring." You mumbled.
"Let's just get to the table so they have nothing to stare at." Hermione spoke and you nodded.
"Nice skirt, Y/L/N!" A voice called out from somewhere in the cafeteria.
You ignored the comment, heading straight for your boyfriend who stood quickly from his seat at the table to greet you.
You're smile returned as you approached, neither of you waiting too long to wrap up in each other's arms. You threw your arms over his shoulder, his cinnamony scent taking over you nostrils almost instantly. His arms wrapped around you waist, gripping you tightly as he soaked in your presence. You felt your body release all tension it held and for a brief moment in time you forgot all about-
"Hey y/n," you're attention broke away from the warmth of Ron's body sinking into yours to the tall brunette with a bright smile on his face. "There's a party in the commons later, you should drop by." He spoke, eyes falling down your body, taking their sweet time in returning back to your face.
"Oh uhm, sure thing Cedric." You spoke, pulling away from you're red headed boyfriend.
"You guys can come too if you want." He spoke looking at the rest of your friends. "Can't wait to hear all about your summer, y/n." He spoke to you, sending a wink before waving goodbye.
You and Cedric had a few classes together, but you were never super close friends. Definitely not close enough to be inviting each other to party's.
"Since when are you Cedric best friends?" Your boyfriend asked noticing the way Cedric totally checked you out and how you didn't even notice.
"We're not. He was just being friendly." You shrugged it off, not seeing much more too it. You sent your boyfriend a sweet smile, unable to contain your happiness that you were finally reunited. "Now am I going to have to pretend that I want you to kiss me or are you going to read my mind?" You joked. Ron smiled, shaking off the weird feelings. His hands moved up to cup your face, bringing yours up to his until your lips came together. He tasted like orange juice and some type of tart berry.
"Oh young love. I love love." Lunas voices spoke breaking your kiss apart. Suddenly you pushed your boyfriend away to hug your other friend Luna. You missed her all too much this summer, seeing her again made your heart happy. "Hello." She giggled.
"It's good to see you, Luna. I've missed you so much."
"I've missed you too, y/n." Your friend smiled sweetly as you finally let her go, giving her space to breathe. "Bold fashion choice, really shows off your legs. You have nice legs." She commented, making your cheeks turn hot.
"Thank you, Luna." You smiled. "It wasn't really intentional, but I have to stick it out for the next few days." You explain and she nods.
"Hey y/n!" A voice called from across the cafeteria again. "Looking good!"
  You smile a bit, not really sure how to respond to the comment. You haven't changed much over the summer. Maybe you grew a few centimeters, and changed your hair up a bit, but you were still the same old y/n. It was like you haven't know half of this dining hall for the past 6/7 years of you life.
  "You've got to be kidding me." Ron scoffed, eyeing around the room from who the sound came from.
  "Ronnie, it's whatever, let's just sit, yeah" you hummed looking the spot he had reserved to you. "Muffins, my favorite." You tried changing the subject but you could still tell how the comment made from some asshole across the way bothered him. His cheeks were glowing red and his eyes squinting a bit. His lips pressed together in a thin line as you guided him to sit back down at the breakfast table.
  The day past very slowly. Teachers making snide remarks about skin, groups of girls whisper in the halls as you passed, and the occasional whistle call from a boy who just couldn't help himself.
  You were invited to the same party about 4 different times today. Each times with your boyfriend present, as if he wasn't standing right there. Some 5th year even tried asking you out in front of Ron, you saved his life by not respond and just pretending you didn't hear. Ron would've ripped the kids ears off if you acknowledged the plain foolery.
   "Where are you going, Ronald?" You asked as class ended. The two of you were supposed to spend your first free period of the school year together in the garden with sweets you snuck here from back home. Right now he just wanted to get out of the classroom as quickly as possible. "Ron!" You spoke louder, your steps quick in order to catch up with him.
  "I heard you the first time, y/n." He turned his head to gripe. Your eyebrows furrowed together at the unnecessarily aggressive comment.
  "If you didn't want to hang out with me, you could've just said. You don't have to be a dick about it." You scoffed, shaking your head even though he couldn't see your obviously hurt visual reaction.
  His hand reached out for your wrist, before you could walk away. You didn't want to cause a scene in the hallway full of students rushing to be out of the halls in a jiffy. You allowed Ron to drag you along with him, until he opened up an empty class room door. He pulled you in, shut the door behind you and spelling it shut so no one would interrupt the two of you.
  "You're not seriously going to that party tonight are you?" He scoffed out first, setting his bag on the ground as he turned to look at you with disappointment.
  "People are expecting me there, Ron. Everyone is going!" You sighed.
  "Doesn't mean you have to!"
"Is that why you're upset? A party? Bloody hell Ronald." You cursed, annoyed with the red head.
  "I'm upset because guys have been flirting with you like crazy all day and you just bloody let them!" He growled as you set your own bag down. "Don't act as if you had all of these friends last year, when we both know you didn't. The only reason the want you to go is so they can stare at your ass some more!" He fired your eyes widening a bit. It made perfect sense... You rarely ever spoke to Cedric before, or half of the boys that approached you today. You took all of their friendly gestures as... friendly gestures. Pulling out seats for you, complimenting your appearance, everything, you thought they were just being kind.
  "Excuse me, I don't see the worst in everyone. It's a new year, we're growing up, they were just being nice! You defend."
  "To you!" He snaps.
"What's that supposed to mean?" You're arms dropped from being crossed over your chest. His mouth opened to respond before shutting again, shaking his head and muttering a quick "never mind, it's nothing". "What did you mean, Ron." You spoke seriously, honestly quite annoyed with his behavior.
  "I've had to watch every boy in this school practically drool all over you since breakfast." He spoke up. You had forgotten about breakfast. "The whistles, the compliments, I even heard some Slytherin talk about winning you over at the party tonight." He sighed, explaining his anger. Was he jealous?
  "But literally everyone knows I'm yours, Ronnie." You respond in a softer tone, taking a step towards him. "I've been your for almost a whole year now, The thought of not being with you hasn't even crossed my mind."
  "Do you think they care, y/n?" He scoffed again. "Your hot, your smart, and you have a boyfriend, your a perfect target!" He whined.
  "I'm not going to be won over by cheap pick up lines and bad booze."
  "Are you sure? Because Cedric seems to think that your already begging him to sweep you off your feet. Was whispering about it all class." He pouted and you heart dropped into your stomach. "And why wouldn't you? He's good looking, sporty, funny, charming, and apparently he's a great kisser."
   "I wouldn't because I don't love him. I love you. I'll always love you, I'll never love anyone the way I love you. Your good looking, smart, you can be sporty if you didn't doubt yourself every five seconds-" he rolled his eyes, attempting to turn away from you before you grabbing his hand pulling him closer to you. "Like your doing now... your hilarious to me, Ronnie. You're the most interesting person I know, and I'm pretty sure your the best kisser to ever grace this sad run down planet." You spoke, pulling him until your bodies touched, placing his hands on your waist as you looked up into his soft eyes. "I love you, Ronald."
  "Do you promise?" He spoke quickly and you nodded.
"I'm going to marry you one day" A smile slowly found its way to his red face, allowing the anger and sadness to flush right through him.
  "I love you, y/n. More than life itself."
"Promise?" You smiled back.
   "Would I ever lie to the mother of my future children?"
  You stood on your tiptoes, leaning your head up until your lips pressed against his. He still tasted like orange juice, the tart berry faded as the day went past. His hands on your waist squeezing as you arms went over his shoulders. Your lips moving against his gave him a good taste of your cherry flavored lip balm. It was a new one, last year your stuck to a watermelon flavored balm.
   You hadn't even noticed the two of you were moving until he helped you hop up on one of the lab tables. Your hands moving down to unbuckle his pants as quickly as possible before he pulled apart your kiss.
  "Are you sure you wanna do this here?" He asked, only because he knew you would die of embarrassment if caught by anyone. He had no problem having sex with you in here, it's not like he hadn't that about it tens of times core.
  "Take me, right here." You nodded, unbuttoning his pants as you focused on one thing. "You know, I've really really missed you this past few months." Your bottom lip caught between your teeth. "I've missed you over and over and over..." you hummed, tugging his pants down enough until they weren't in your way.
  "That's a lot of missing me." Ron swallowed, you fingers slipping past the waist band of his boxers pulling them down a bit before you pulled out his cock with precum already leaking from his tip.
  "Mmhmm." You lost count of how many times you struggled to get yourself off without Ron. It was frustrating and made you regret not spend at least a few weeks with him and his family. "I've felt Kinda... empty." You spoke spreading your legs for him as he prepped himself.
  "I could help you out with that... make you feel more... full." He offered and you nodded. His hands slipping under the skirt that was no basically showing your whole ass, pushing you black panties to the sides. You were already dripping as his fingers ran up you slit to make sure you were ready for him.
  "Please Ronnie." You moaned, as he lined himself up with your entrance.
   He looked to you for last second approval, you nod, pulling his body closer to yours by his tie, connecting your lips once more before he finally pushed into you. You both groaned at the sensation, he stretched you out until you felt the pleasurable burn spreading through your groin. Not stopping until your hips met and he was deep inside of you. Your walls clenched around him, missing the feeling of the burn he usually ensued.
   He drew his hips back only a bit before slowly rocking himself into you. Your ass on the very edge of the table. Legs wrapped around his waist and he fucked into you. Lips still connected in sloppy slow sensual kisses that you dreamt about so many nights this summer. Your muffled moans filled the dead silence in the empty classroom the two of you were occupying. The sounds only encouraging his movements as his hips sped up in pace, hands down to grip your thighs to keep your legs apart for him. This wasn't the way either of you wanted to wanted to greet each other after 3 sum months, but it'd have to do.
  "God, your so tight!" Ron moaned through the sloppily kisses. His voice made you clench around him once more making his hips stutter as he moved faster and harder.
  "You feel so good baby."you moaned, voice in a high pitch and out of breath.
   His lips moved from your to down your neck, arm wrapped around your back to keep you steady. You were trying to keep yourself quiet in case any stragglers in the halls happened to walk by. You let out tiny gasps and squeals whenever he hit a particular deep spot in your cunt that nearly drove you mad.
   "F-fuck"
His hand moved from your thigh to your clit. Rubbing harsh circle on the bundle of nerves. Your jaw fell open as you tried to focus on a single point of pleasure to celebrate, with his cock hitting your g spot with every thrust and your clit sending pleasurable shocks through the rest of your body it was hard to focus on just one thing.
   "M's-so cl-ose-" you choked out, unable to really forming words.
  "I know, babe, cum for me, Princess." Ronald murmured, brain foggy with lust. Hips still rocking into
yours as you desperately tried to hold on for just a bit longer. It became harder to control to noises slipping past your lips. Uttering his name in your whines as he brought you over the edge, hips moving a bit slower as you clenched tightly around him, legs shaking a bit as he helped you ride out your orgasm.
“Oh fuck” you moaned, breathing heavy and hips still rocking into his.
“Almost forgot how pretty you are when you do that.” He smirks, your eyebrows furrowing a bit.
“When I do what?” You hum, he opened his mouth to respond but he just shut it back again before shaking his head.
“Nothing.” He shrugged.
“N- wait, did you..?” You peered down between the two of you.
“Uhm no, it’s fine- I don’t even have condom on me-”
“I can-”
“No, you don’t have to-”
“I want to.” You stated, smiling at the way it was so easy to read each other’s minds. “Really.”
“I mean... yeah, uhm okay.” He spoke, cheeks turning a bright red color. You nodded letting out a slight moan as he pulled out of you. He helped you off the table, allowing you to fix your skirt before sinking down to your knees. You looked up to him through your lashes basically causing his insides to melt at the sight.
You wasted no time in making sure he was satisfied. Your lips arm lips warming around him, tongue collecting all of your own juices as you took him further into your mouth. You let out a soft moan, sending the vibrations through his spine earning a groan from him. His mouth fell open as he felt his tip touch the back of your throat. His eyes glued on your lips as his cock disappeared in your mouth over and over. He fought the strong urge to see just how far you could take him in your pretty mouth before you couldn’t breathe.
“Bloody hell, just like that, y/n.” He moaned, hand finding its way to the back of your head, only pushing you into him gently. You didn’t mind it, you actually very often craved the way he usually took control. That ache between your legs returned, the one that usually made your mind foggy and made bad decisions seem not so bad in the long run.
The ground cold on your knees, skirt wrapped tightly around your body, boyfriend beginning to twitch as your push your limit in how far he could go. Tears polling in the bottom of your eyes, threatening to ruin the makeup you had done perfectly for the day. You felt his cock twitching in your mouth enjoying the noises coming from his throat as he neared his high.
“Fuck I’m gonna-” he moaned before spilling his hot seed into you mouth. Without think you swallow I’m around him, milking him for whatever he was worth before he had to pull you away from him. Both of you slightly out of breath before as he helped you to your feet. Your lips glossy from a mixture of spit and his cum, which he didn’t seem to mind as he pulled you in for one final kiss.
“We should skip next period and lunch, have some fun... I haven’t seen you all summer and I really missed you.” You emphasized on the really, as you pulled away from the kiss.
“And as much as I’m not opposed to that, you’d castrate me tomorrow for letting you skip the first day just to have sex.”
“Mm, you get me.” You giggled, watching as he fixed himself so he could the two of you could return to normal civilization. “Now we should go before someone tries to get in here.” You mentioned, fixing your own skirt once again, and making sure you had no remnants of Ron on your face or clothes. You helped fix his tie until you both looked as well as two people could after fucking in a classroom. “Do you think we could sneak out tonight? Have a picnic under the Stars somewhere?” You asked, earning a light hearted chuckle from your boyfriend.
“What about your party?” He asked.
“They’ll just have to miss us.” You shrugged, taking Ron’s hand in yours as you know lace your bag on you shoulder.
He didn’t respond but you knew the answer. He just smile as pulled the both of you towards the door stopping as you heard the quick tapping of someone’s feet’s along the stone floors. You both paused in the doorway, hearts beating before watching your dark haired best friend turn the corner. He spotted the two of you quickly with a smile, out of breath and not really in the position to stop but he did so anyways.
“Woah, mate, what are you doing?” Ron asked, confusion lightly his face.
Harry’s eyes flickered from you back to Ron before rolling to the back of his head out of annoyance.
“That thing we said we were going to do earlier. You disappeared so I did it myself... and well... I got caught, so if you will excuse me-" you’re eyebrows furrowed as you looked to Ron with a sudden pale and tense figure.
“What did you do?” You groaned.
“YOU’RE DEAD POTTER!” A familiar clump of voices called, echoing through the halls before you’re eyes went wide.
“Tell you later?” He offered before you rolled your eyes gripping your boyfriend hand as you both prepared to run along side your friend.
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lady-divine-writes · 3 years ago
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Good Omens - A Corpse, Cake, and a Cuppa (Rated NC17)
Summary: Aziraphale is Death and Crowley is the serial killer who keeps murdering to catch a glimpse of the ethereal being he fell in love with. (1714 words)
Notes: Written for the above Halloween prompt from @new-endings/M.A.D.#8943. Human Crowley au. It’s kind of gory, I’m not going to lie.
Read on AO3.
“Jesus Christmas!" Aziraphale yelps, tiptoeing through the thick pool of red coagulating on the concrete. Threads of it cling to the soles of his shoes when he lifts his feet as if trying to drag him down. Aziraphale has seen a great deal of blood in his time. None of it has been pretty. But this is especially gruesome.
He wonders if that’s for his benefit.
"Look at... look at this! Look at all the… !” Aziraphale takes a pause and breathes in deep, pressing the thumb and forefinger of his right hand to his forehead. Tension causes a vein to distend and throb - quite the feat since, as a non-human entity, he shouldn't be able to experience this kind of pain. Or so he thought. In the thousands of years he's roamed earth reaping souls, he's finally found the one mortal who can give him what humans call a migraine. And he doesn't like it. Not one bit. “Could you please just… stop already?"
Crowley grins, thrilled giddy by the arrival of his intended audience. “No,” he replies, shoving the slicked head of his filthy ax deeper into the severed spine of the fresh corpse at his feet.
Aziraphale grimaces as the blade lands with a resounding slap. 
That ax of Crowley's gets on every one of Aziraphale's nerves. It's effective for its purpose but positively unsanitary. It makes his skin crawl every time he sees it.
Crowley lifts it slowly, eyes Aziraphale menacingly.
Eyes his nice, clean coat, Aziraphale realizes.
“Crowley!” he warns, putting both hands up in defense. “Don't you dare... !”
But Crowley doesn't let him finish, hoisting his ax higher with part of the dead man's torso attached. He doesn't need to do anything after that. The torso falls from the blade and splashes down in the pool, accomplishing what Crowley set out to do.
“Holy... GAH!” Aziraphale leaps back to avoid the spray. He frowns at his clothes when he sees he wasn't quick enough. "Look what you've done! You’ve made a mess of my coat!”
“Improved it, I’d say,” Crowley snarks. “Given it a pop of color.”
“I've had this coat for ages and hadn't collected a single stain! Not one! And look at your shoes! Ruined!" He gazes down at Crowley's feet in despair. "I actually liked that pair.”
“Really?" Crowley tilts his head, batting his eyes innocently. "You didn't tell me that.”
“Yes, well... " Aziraphale busies himself fishing a handkerchief out of his pocket. Praying he’s swift enough to save the fabric, he pats at the specks on his sleeve "... it’s not my place to tell a homicidal maniac that he looks fetching in snakeskin, is it?”
Crowley pouts, his lower lip jutting out, making him look comically childish despite the streaks of blood running down his cheeks. 
Aziraphale’s brows pull together. He glances around, trying to work out what's wrong. "What? What is it?"
"You're being mean."
"How am I being mean?"
"You're calling me names."
"Accurate ones, yes."
"You sound disappointed."
"You think so!?"
“B-but... but why? I took your advice!" Crowley argues. "I changed me m.o.!”
“I didn’t give you advice! I said you should stop killing innocent people!”
“I did! This guy?" Crowley plants the heel of his sopping shoe into the dead man's crooked neck for emphasis. "He weren’t innocent! He was a serial killer, too! He just happened to be shite at it!”
"I can see that." Aziraphale peers into the vacant eyes of the man on the ground, spirit buzzing beneath his skin, waiting to be reaped. But Aziraphale is in no rush. In the choice between filling out paperwork and shooting the shite with Crowley, surprisingly, he chooses Crowley. 
Or maybe not so surprising, Aziraphale muses, biting his lower lip and indulging in a private chuckle. He rolls his eyes in disgust at himself right after. What are you doing? Stop that!
"Besides, I'm doin' you a solid!" 
Aziraphale scoffs, snapping back to his senses. "How do you figure?"
"You're Death, ain't ya? I'm keeping you in business!"
"I don't know if you've read the papers lately, dear boy, but humans are dropping like flies thanks to their own stubbornness and stupidity. You're slap in the middle of one of the worst pandemics in history, but instead of doing what you can to stay safe, you lot spend your time arguing over petty b.s.! I won't wear a mask! It's against my rights! I'm not taking the vaccine! It'll make me sterile! There is no disease! It's all a big conspiracy! Meanwhile, in the states, some orange lunatic has everyone drinking bleach! Believe me, I hardly need your help doing my job!" 
“Oi! Don’t lump me in with those prats!”
“Why not? You’re not wearing a mask, I see.”
“Don’t have to. I got my shot. And I keep me distance.”
“But you’re covered in blood! Did that man you dismembered have the virus!? You don’t know!” Aziraphale cringes at words that sound far more like concern than scolding. Which he should be doing. Scolding and ridiculing, and possibly calling the police.
But he won’t.
If Crowley were thrown in prison, it would be harder for Aziraphale to find an excuse to see him. Aziraphale has yet to decide if that’s something he wants, but either way, he’d prefer it not be at the expense of another life.
"Fine. Whatever. If that's the way you feel about it... " Crowley grumbles, letting what remains of that statement die as embarrassment rises to his cheeks, settling beneath the red already there. He crosses his arms over his chest and turns his face away. 
Just like a child, Aziraphale thinks. 
And as with a child, Aziraphale should have nipped this in the bud much, much earlier - like when Crowley realized that he could summon Aziraphale whenever he wanted by upping the frequency of his murderous antics. 
This, to date, is his twenty-seventh kill.
Aziraphale doesn't know how Crowley spotted him. He's pretty adept at avoiding human detection. But after victim number eight, Aziraphale turned around, scythe in hand, and there he stood: tall, gangly, bizarrely besotted, dressed in black and wearing sunglasses at one in the morning. Aziraphale thought Crowley was a run-of-the-mill psychopath looking for attention, seeing Aziraphale as a hapless dolt to play cat-and-mouse with, not knowing for one second who he was dealing with.
Not only did Crowley know exactly who Aziraphale was, but he had taken a considerable shine to him.
Aziraphale humored the man when their paths crossed so he could get on with his work, never for one minute considering the consequences. Thinking back on their past interactions, Aziraphale can pick out the hints Crowley had been dropping.
Aziraphale played right into them, and he could kick himself over it.
"We have to stop meeting like this," Aziraphale quipped dryly after Crowley had beheaded some poor, down-on-his-luck fool. "I'm going to start thinking that you have a thing for me."
"Finally!" Crowley tossed his arms in the air. "At this rate, I was going to have to murder half of London and spell out the words ’Will you go out with me?’ with their bodies. Do you know how time-consuming that would have been?"
Aziraphale had written that comment off as a morbid attempt at humor. 
Now he feels like an imbecile.
He’s going to get an earful from Gabriel if he ever gets wind of this. Aziraphale has been able to cover up the increase in London deaths by blaming the pandemic. But once people get their acts together and things calm down, he’ll have to come clean.
There’s a serial killer roaming the streets that has a serious crush on him.
Aziraphale lets out a heavy sigh as he comes to a decision.
A bad decision.
He's going to regret this. He knows he's going to regret this. 
But will he really though?
Aziraphale looks Crowley over, still moping with his nose in the air. He examines him at depth - his sharp features, his debonair style (hiding beneath a litre of blood), his devil-may-care attitude, his rowdy sense of humor. If he were another angel, or even a demon, Aziraphale would have asked him out already, body count or no. 
So what is he waiting for?
It’s not entirely unheard of, an angel dating outside their dominion. And as for the moral issues of dating a murderer, well, Aziraphale is an angel. He has a responsibility to bring sinners to the light, help them see the truth. That can be done anywhere, not just in church - on a street corner, in a diner…
Back at his flat.
Besides, he and Crowley have a lot more in common than Aziraphale did with his last paramour, an angel he had dallied with solely for the fact that he was guardian of comestibles.
It seemed like a match made in Heaven, so to speak.
Far from it.
“Look - if I let you take me out for coffee, will you stop the gratuitous bloodshed?”
Crowley all but gasps when that question leaves Aziraphale’s mouth, the grin growing on his face transforming, becoming less maniacal and more… normal if that makes any sense. "One cup of coffee. That's all I ask."
"Then come along. Here… “ Aziraphale snaps his fingers, cleaning Crowley thoroughly before he takes his arm. “If you're good, I'll let you buy me a slice of cake.”
“That’s very generous of you.”
“I’m glad you think so. I’m a very slow eater. And I figure the longer I stay with you, the more I can keep an eye on you."
“Deal. But, you know," Crowley starts, his tone so filled with teasing he’s on the verge of giggles, "if you, say, spent the night at my flat, you could keep an eye on me for hours. Think of all the people I wouldn’t be able to kill.”
Aziraphale smirks, amused that they both had a semblance of the same idea. “You don’t say?”
“I do.”
“That’s blackmail.”
“More so than you bartering human lives against a cuppa and cake?”
Aziraphale shrugs, but he doesn't relinquish Crowley's arm. He does, however, relieve him of his ax so he doesn’t get any ideas along the way. “Fair point.”
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dameronology · 4 years ago
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tea and whiskey {jack daniels x reader} - 6
summary: despite his best efforts, it appears as though you're completely slipping through jack's fingers. it appears as though he has no choice but to put everything out on the table in a last ditch attempt to keep you by his side. {series masterlist}
warnings: swearing, mentions of drinking, mentions of death
this one's a bit of a rollercoaster, but i promise it's fun <3
- jazz xx
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You'd told Jack that things between you were fine.
They didn't feel as much.
You had meant it when you'd said it - it was just that the more you thought about it and the more you pondered on your concerns, the more worried you became. Did you even know Jack Daniels at all? His mysteriousness had been attractive at first but the closer you got to him, the more you found yourself wanting to hold him at an arm's length until you had your answers. When the situation between you had been a co-workers-with-benefits affair, it hadn't mattered so much. But now, you'd agreed it was something more intense, something more meaningful. Was it unfair to think that you deserved to know a little more? To get a more substance than just it's fine, trust me?
Whilst you hadn't wanted it to get in the ways of things, you couldn't help it. It hadn't changed anything the first few days after your conversation about where you stood, or about his seeming vendetta against Ginger, but the more you thought about it, the more it got to you. It had been almost 2 weeks since then, and you'd spent most of the second one lying to him. Telling him you had to call Eggsy, or your mum, or that you had to work late to get some paperwork done for Merlin.
Tonight had been no different - it was a Friday, the last six of which you had spent at Jack's. You'd given him some ridiculous waffle about timezones and reporting to the Kingsman. He had seemed to believe it; if he didn't, he'd chosen not to comment on it.
You were sat in your shared office, heels kicked to one side and feet propped up on the table. There was a glass of wine in one hand and your phone in the other (you were exchanging memes with Eggsy), and an episode of the The Crown playing on your computer. It was a nice way of getting your mind off of the situation with Jack, and the fact that you had a mountain of Calahan-related paperwork.
"So, this is the important meeting that you ditched me for?"
You froze at the sound of Jack's voice. He was leant against the doorway, arms folded over his chest and a look on his face that didn't seem too far off of pissed. Your first instinct was to lie, but the urge quickly faded. What was the point? He'd already caught you in one. Might as well just rip it off like a band-aid.
"I lied."
"That's clear as fucking day." Jack shot back. "Am I boring you all of a sudden?"
"Jack." You sighed. "I just needed some space to think."
"I thought we were good?" His brown eyes fell to the floor. "What's with all the lying? I admire your brutal honesty."
"I was only brutally honest with people I didn't mind hurting." You paused your laptop, pulling your feet down from the desk. "I care about you and I don't want to hurt you-"
"- I have pretty thick skin." He cut you off. "Be honest - you have my blessing."
"I thought I was okay with how intense things were getting," you began. "But the more, I think about it, the more I'm not sure."
Jack's face fell. "That's why you've suddenly been distant these past two weeks, huh?"
"Yeah." You nodded.
"What brought this on?"
You were silent.
"I know." Jack sighed. "It's the thing with Ginger, isn't it?"
"Not just that." You said. "You asked me to trust you and I agreed to, but I'm not sure I do."
"What have I ever done to make you not trust me?"
"Nothing, but that's my problem." You replied. "This is all on me."
"It sure as hell is." He sniffed. "If you want space, I'll give you space. Just don't count on me to be here when you get back."
--
The tension in Champ's office the following morning was almost fucking suffocating.
The poor man had no idea what had gone down between the two of you. Heck, even you were struggling to understand it. You'd got yourself into situations before with your tendency to overthink, but this one might have taken the cake. Relationships - or whatever the hell you and Jack had going on - had never been your area of expertise, and you had no idea how to navigate your situation. It had seemed like a good idea to act on your doubt and be honest with him, but now you were just worried that you'd ruined it.
"You two are making excellent progress with your mission to get Calahan." Champ said.
"Thank you, sir." Jack nodded.
"We need to discuss the matter of when you catch him."
"I appreciate your faith in us, but if we catch him, rather than when we catch him might be a little more realistic." You replied.
"I'm not certain of many things, but I am absolutely sure that you and Jack have this in the bag." Champ shot back. "And when you do, I'm afraid there is only room for one name on the arrest forms."
You sat up in your seat. "What do you mean?"
"I know that you two have made a completely join effort in this matter." He began. "But as far as Interpol, and every international agency has seen it, only one person's name can be on the paperwork."
"But we can both take credit, right?" You urged. "Surely, they can recognise us both for our work."
"I'm afraid not, Percy." Champ sighed. "The paperwork can only be processed under one name-"
"- why?" Jack cut him off. "I mean, why, sir?"
"Traditionally, only one agent would go into the field, to keep the casualties as low as possible." He explained. "Things have changed in practice but on paper, things still stand."
"So what are we meant to do?" You asked.
"You'll have to decide between yourselves who gets that recognition." He replied.
"Right." You murmured and stood up. "Thank you, sir."
Champ gave you a nod. "And you, agent. I'm sorry it has to be this way."
Me too, you thought.
You stalked out of Champ's office, Jack hot on your heels. If things had been a little tense before, they were going to be strangling now. The cowboy was already hurt by your revelation from the night before, and now, that was only going to get worst, because there was no way in hell that you were about to give the reins over to him. You'd make it clear from day one that your job came first, so that shouldn't have been a surprise to anyone.
Heels clicking loudly against the floor, you sped up slightly in an attempt to lose him. It had been foolish, though, because before you could sprint into the ladies' room, Jack grabbed you by the arm and pulled you to the side.
"Lying to me and running away from me?" He asked. "You're breaking my fucking heart, baby."
You swatted his hand away and puffed out your chest. "I'm taking credit for Calahan."
Jack thinned his eyes at you. "We should talk about this."
"There's nothing to talk about." You said. "I chased his ass all the across the Atlanic and I've been working on this project longer than you. Personal feelings aside, it makes sense."
"It sounds like you're saying you've done most the work."
"That is what I'm saying."
"I've done most the physical work." He shot back. "The chasing, the jumping over walls, the field work."
"None of which you could have done without me."
"Is this because of what I said last night? Are you mad?" He asked.
"No, I'm mad because you know how much this means to me!" You shoved him. "A win like this is all I've ever wanted. You know that!"
"It means a lot to me too!"
"I am putting my name on those papers." You snapped. "I've spent my whole life living in the fucking shadows at Kingsman and I'm tired of it. This is my win."
"With an attitude like that, I don't blame the damn redcoats for wanting to keep you in the shadows."
Your mouth fell open. If that had come from anyone else, you could have dealt with it. But Jack? The man who had always encouraged and loved your fire? The man you'd opened up to about how suffocated you felt at Kingsman? It was though he'd thrown your trust right back in your face.
"Wait, I didn't mean that-"
"- fuck you, Jack."
--
Drinking was, essentially, the thing that had gotten you into this whole situation in the first place. It was this very bar, in fact.
It was beyond you why you'd gone to Jack's favourite cowboy bar to simmer; probably because it was the closest thing you could get to actually being in his presence right now. Which was quite funny, because if you were in his presence, you no doubt would have decked him right there and then. His stupid fucking words were playing on a loop in your head, and it felt like a punch to your gut every time they circled back around your pre-fontal cortex.
You could have called Eggsy and vented to him, but that would involve recounting the whole story to him. He'd want to whoop Jack's ass for going near you in the first place, and eject him into outer space entirely for his petty jab. God, you missed your best friend.
Despite your anger, you hadn't even drank that much. Maybe a beer, or three - way below the amount you needed to even get tipsy. Drunken rage barely did you favours at the best of times, and right now was definitely the worst of times. It was just that sitting in a bar was a much better alternative to wallowing in your pity, alone in your larger-than-life apartment.
You sighed and took another sip of your drink, glancing over at your phone. There were three texts from Jack; a please call me, a I'll explain everything and a I fucked up, I know. You couldn't help but snort - what reason did he even have for talking to you that way?
With a twenty tossed on the bar and an empty glass, you shrugged your jacket on and began the walk back to your apartment. The air was cold and everyone was rushing around you to get back to their own respective homes. You had never wanted more in your life to go back to yours - your home in London. The one filled with pictures of you and your family, with memories of dumb sleepovers with Eggsy and late nights with your favourite films.
"So you're stalking me now?"
You could't muster up any other words when you saw Jack waiting by your door. Apparently his ignored texts and calls hadn't been a big enough sign.
"I didn't know where you were." Jack murmured.
"I was out." You shoved your way past him. "You can go now."
"We need to talk."
"Not right now." You groaned. "I'm tired, no thanks to you."
"I don't like when things are like this." He continued, following you inside as you unlocked the door. "I can't stand the idea of you being mad at me."
"So why do you do shit that makes me mad?" You shot back.
Jack sighed, leaning against your kitchen earlier. "I shouldn't have said what I did earlier. I was hurt-"
"- you were hurt?!" You snorted in disbelief.
"It fucking killed me when you said that you didn't trust me, sugar." He admitted. "I get why. I've been holding a lot of stuff back from you and I...I don't think it'll excuse my behaviour, but it might at least give you a reason."
"Okay." You murmured.
"I've barely told anyone this, but I trust you." He reached out and took your hands in his. "It's a lot."
"Jack, you don't have to-"
"- I used to be married." He cut you off. You froze at his words. "Her name was Georgia, and we'd been in love since high-school."
"I..." you trailed off. "Used to be?"
"She was killed in a shoot-out during a robbery." Jack's voice wavered slightly. "She was pregnant at the time. I lost two people that day."
"Shit." You murmured. "I'm sorry, Jack."
"It's fine." He replied. "Not your fault, sweetheart."
"Who else knows?"
"Ginger." He said. "She was a friend of mine, long before we were at Statesman. Georgia's best friend, too."
"You're trying to protect her, aren't you?" You glanced up, eyes meeting. "By keeping her out the field?"
"It's a shitty excuse." He half-heartedly shrugged. "She's all I have left of Georgia. The only person who really shares my pain."
Jack was right -- it hadn't been an excuse, but it was an explanation. You couldn't even begin to get your head around the kind of pain he must have felt then, or even the kind he felt now. You'd had weeks worth of deep conversations and late-night talks but he had never, ever even remotely mentioned Georgia, or his unborn child. You couldn't blame him for that. Not in the slightest.
You were struggling to find the words, really. A thousand new layers had just been added to a man you were already struggling to understand.
"That must be a real weight on your shoulders."
"It is." Jack nodded. "But it lifts slightly when I'm with you."
"Really?" You asked quietly.
"Completely." He countered. "That's all I've wanted my entire life -- to feel again, and I do with you."
"That's deep." You tried to crack a joke, to lighten the mood.
"Even if this ends when you go back to London, I'm still grateful." He continued. "You gave me that, so I should give you what you've always wanted."
"A real-life Batmobile?"
Jack snorted, despite the emotional atmosphere. "Your name will have to go on those papers. It should never have even been a question."
"Jack, I-"
"- that's all there is to say." He shook his head. "There'll be other arrests and missions, but I'll never find someone like you."
Without anything to say, you placed your hands on either side of his face and pulled him into a kiss. That in itself said everything you needed to- thank you, I'm sorry, maybe you don't suck that much, etc. The entire conversation marked a definitive shift in your relationship, and even though it was one that neither of you could quite work out, that didn't matter. You'd thrown yourself back into the deep end, even though you'd been so hell-bent on breaking to the surface just hours earlier.
There was no doubt that it would only complicated the whole let's not fall in love promise you'd made -- but that was something to worry about later, right?
taglist: @b0nnyzz @xremember-me-notx @somenerdyuser @demigod-dragonrider-schoolidol @javisjeanjacket @phoenixhalliwell @no-droids-on-sunday​ @paintballkid711​ @waatermelon-sugaar​ @hepburnwritess​ @haileyybird​ @xjaywritesx​ @jabbajambler​ @the-mandalorian-clone-lover​ @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky​ @welcometothepedroverse​ @wickedmuse​
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xwing-baby · 4 years ago
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Impulse: El Ojo (Javier Peña x f!Reader)
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Summary: Top of your class, the DEA have sent you to Colombia to be the poster child for their new ‘placement program’. You’re thrown in at the deep end into the drug war. With Agent Peña as your mentor, what could possibly go wrong? 
Warnings: swearing, injury to reader, alcohol and drug abuse, threatening with guns, brief mentions of torture, description of injury and blood, unwanted touching, flirting, bad thought processes (addiction). PINK SHIRT 
Word Count: 5k 
A/N: Had a little change of plan last week, this is now the final chapter of this series. I am so sad to end it now, I’ve loved writing this so much. My first time writing for Narcos so thank you so much for all the support y’all I’ve given me with this. I love you all. I hope you enjoy this chapter!! 
<-- Previous Chapter // Masterlist //  Next Chapter -->
--
You were on a winning streak. Since you’d found the list of sicarios and matched that up with the more current information, you’d presented it to Carrillo and surprisingly he was on board. With his help, you had brought down five, admittedly low level but increasingly more valuable, sicarios. If you didn’t think about the torture and abuse each of them undertook once captured, used to break them into more telling more information, you could say you were doing a good job. Escobar’s organisation was shaking. You were coming for him. 
You and Steve leant against a wall, soaking up the sunshine chatting amongst yourselves when you saw Javier arrive. You hadn’t expected him to come at all, having disappeared without a word early on in the morning. He parked his truck close by, walking over to you and Steve with his vest in hand. You grinned and jabbed Steve when you saw the shirt Javi was wearing. 
The pink shirt had been a long-standing joke since you’d found it in his closet a few months ago. He had many colourful shirts, was known for them, but the pink one always seemed like another level. You and Steve teased him about it constantly, though you had to admit it did look good on him now. Javi scowled when he saw you and Steve’s mischievous grins, immediately realising his mistake. 
“I know you get called the Whore of Bogata but you don’t need to dress like it! Jesus christ Javi!” You fanned yourself with your hand, grinning at him, “really I’m going to need a minute,” Javi flipped you off as you laughed hard.  
“Shut up, I look great,” He grumbled. 
“Just thinking about the poor flamingo you rinsed for that colour,” Steve joined in the teasing, shaking his head sadly. 
“You are just jealous you could never pull this colour off,” Javi said smugly. You laughed.
“Maybe you shouldn’t come out today, could be quite distracting,” You said, pretending to be thoughtful. Javi’s frowned, only making you and Steve laugh more, “Aw don’t get pissy, Baby. We love you really” You teased him in a mocking voice, pouting at him. “You and your flamboyant choices,” You ruffled his hair up as you passed him. He tried to duck out the way but you caught him. He shoved you away, muttering expletives under his breath. You skipped a few paces out of his reach, flipped him off. 
“L/n!” Somebody called your name across the street, one of the technicians you’d been talking to before Javier arrived. You left Steve and Javier to talk. 
The technician explained the problem again, showing you the options for moving forward. It was quite common that things would go wrong before any kind of mission. Today was no different, the technicians had lost a signal and were now not sure that the address you had swarmed was correct.  
You chewed your nails while you thought. You could risk getting the wrong house, letting the sicarios know you were on to them and you’d lose them again. You could come back another day, but risk losing them again. Or you could ransack some innocent person's house and have Carrillo on your ass for ruining his reputation in the one week he’d left you in charge. 
 If you messed this up it would mean your stronghold would be lost. There would be time for them to work out what was going on and move everything again. 
At a loss, you excused yourself needing to take a break and a few minutes alone to think without soldiers trying to put in their two cents. 
As your work life had become more stressful over the last months. You had found some relief in, ironically, coke. It wasn’t a habit you were trying to form, but you had learnt just what good taking just a little bit could do for you. It quietened down your worried brain and made you simultaneously more aware of everything. You were better when you were just a little bit high.  
You had started keeping a small amount in your pocket. Hidden in a small sewing tin in your jacket pocket, you had started keeping a little coke on you especially for moments like this. You could take it, have a breather, and come back with a solution. It was fine. Nobody would know. 
You’d spotted a cafe across the road, and hoped they had a restroom. You gave an excuse to the soldier you’d been talking to and walked across the street.
“Oi Rookie!” Javi called as he noticed you walk past on the opposite side of the street. “Where are you going?” 
“Going to the bathroom. Women’s issues,” You called back, Javi and Steve grimaced. That was always the best excuse.
While you wouldn’t do it at the compound you didn’t have any reservation here. You’d been itching for a hit all morning and there was only so much more you could take. You walked into the cafe, asked for the direction of the restroom, and locked the door behind you once you were inside. Small, dark and stinking of pee, it was not the best place but hygiene wasn’t particularly an issue you were worried about. 
You tipped a small amount from the box onto the sink counter, lined it up with a card from your pocket, bent down and took it up your nose. You grimaced, while it had burnt your nose somewhat it still stung. But it was worth it when the feeling began to kick in. You smiled at your reflection and double-checked your appearance in the mirror, wiping your nose. Nobody could ever tell. 
As usual, the drug kicked your brain into gear again and everything fell into place. The raid went brilliantly, by pure coincidence you’d bagged two sicarios in one as your original target had invited your next round for dinner with his new girlfriend. Your plan well into the swing of things now, much to everyone’s surprise. 
Like every weekend for the last three months, you were going out. The line between enemies and friends was long since blurred, hanging out with ‘Isabela’s’ friends was not an issue. Most of the time you weren’t even trying to get anything from them, you’d got what you needed months ago. As fun as Javier and Steve were, it was much more enjoyable to hang out with people your age. And they wouldn’t give you cocaine, María had it on tap. 
You were dressed up, recently treating yourself to a new outfit as a job well done. A black off the shoulder top, covered in lace, and a little black mini skirt. You felt sexy, you were going to have a very good night. 
“Rookie!” Javier called out to you as he came out of the apartment building. You were standing outside waiting for a taxi, smoking a cigarette.
“Javi, baby, you’re looking slick! Where are you going?” You checked him out. He wore his signature tight blue jeans and an equally tight black shirt that was almost bursting at the seams. He looked incredible, as he always did. 
You were thankful that things had gone back to normal between you and Javier. The awkward stepping around each other had gone, you weren’t jealous. You acknowledged you would probably always like him a little more than was professional but that had fallen into a fun flirty banter that more than anything just wound Steve up.
You found yourself calling him Baby more than his name, it’d started as a joke to get back at him for always calling you Rookie but now it was so commonplace people had stopped picking you up on it if it slipped out while you were working.  
It was fun. You cared for each other, that was clear to even a blind man, but there was no romanticism to the relationship anymore. There was no need. It wasn’t good for either of you. You’d found a comfortable rhythm and were going to stick to it. 
“Out,” He shrugged, “That’s a new top,”
“You noticed?” 
 “Course, can’t keep my eyes off you,” He purred, happily playing along with your game. 
“Thought you’d be more interested in the skirt,” 
“Will you two quit it?” Steve’s voice interrupted your flirting as he walked down the stairs. You barked in laughter. 
“Steve! So it’s a boys night I see? Where was my invite?” 
“Figured you’d have your own plans,” Steve said. 
“And you are correct Murphy but it’s always polite to ask,”
 “Next time,” He assured you. “Where are you going tonight?” 
“I don’t know. Some club, El Ojo or something?” You shrugged, “Seeing as this is maybe Isabela’s last time out I am going to go out with a bang, literally,” You raised an eyebrow, insinuation of your worlds made Steve roll his eyes. 
You were hoping within the next few weeks to be able to close in on some higher level sicarios and associates to Escobar. Drawing the noose in slowly so he wouldn’t notice until it’d choked him. That meant your position as Isabela was going to have to come to an end to keep you safe from your own program. You’d discussed it at length with Peña and Murphy, while you didn’t agree you had to listen to them. They were still your superiors after all, no matter how close friends you were. 
“If you told past you you were going to willingly sleep with a Narco I think you would have passed out,” Steve laughed. 
“I’m a changed woman Murphy, what can I say,” You smirked, “Imagine what I’ll be like by the end of the year,” 
“God help us,” Javier shook his head, a smirk plastered on his face. You laughed and stubbed out your cigarette with your shoe as your taxi pulled around the corner. 
“Here’s my ride. Have a good night, boys. I will be back in the morning,”
 —
El Ojo was just as María had told you. Modern and smoke-filled, people were filling every inch of the space. You walked in and couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face. This was exactly what you needed. Crowds were anonymous, nobody cared who you were or what you were doing. Everyone was just there for one reason, to have a good time. 
You ordered a drink at the bar, flirting with the man next to you briefly before taking the drink and finding your friends. As usual, they were up in the VIP area, courtesy of the Parreño name. You walked up and were let inside the cordoned-off area to find Diego stood up on his seat, wild-eyed, shouting about something. It wasn’t until you got closer that you heard what he was saying. 
“I’m telling you Isabela is lying!” He shouted above the music. 
“What’s going on?” You asked. None of the ten people surrounding the booth noticed your approach, their eyes shifting awkwardly when they saw you. 
“You! You’re a liar!” Diego pointed down at you, hatred burning behind his eyes. 
“What is going on?” You asked again. You looked around for María, she was usually the one to step between you and Diego, but she was nowhere to be seen. This was not the kind of conversation you’d wanted for this evening. 
“You were the only one to survive that raid at Carlos’,” He continued, jumping off the couch to your level,  “That fucking maniac Carrillo killed everyone but you! You’re working with them, aren’t you?” 
“You’ve lost it,” You rolled your eyes, “Completely lost it,”
“You don’t deny it!” He yelled. You gulped, trying not to look scared of the man but the rage in his eyes was shaking you. You stepped backwards as he advanced toward you
“You’re insane!” You laughed in his face, “I’m not a fucking spy, especially not for Carrillo,” 
“Bullshit,” He spat, Suddenly he pulled a gun from his back, waving it in your face. People shouted and screamed around you, scattering as the metal glinted in the light. Your eyes remained on his, not saying a word as he pressed the barrel into your neck. You didn’t move, barely breathing, “You’re a fucking rat,” He growled.
“Diego!” Finally, María stepped in, running over when she heard the commotion. “Stop it, put it away. Idiot,” She pulled the gun from his hand, standing firmly between you and him. “Ignore him. He’s paranoid. Someone’s leaking information and he thinks it's you because he’s a jealous asshole,” Maria explained, swiftly pushing him backwards until he sat back in the booth again, “How fucking ridiculous would that be? You? A spy!” 
“Insane,”  You agreed through a clenched jaw. Diego continued to glare at you dangerously, leaning over to whisper something to a friend. 
“I swear if we get banned from this club because of you Diego I am leaving you,” María said angrily, “Come on, I want to party,” She linked her arm through you, not caring that you were still in shock from having a gun held to you, and dragged you to the bar.
Fortunately, copious amounts of vodka and tequila were great for calming your nerves. In a few hours, you had nearly forgotten the entire ordeal. You couldn’t think about anything more than the music ringing in your ears and how good it felt dancing on the stranger behind you. 
After a while, María pulled you back up to the booth where Diego and his friends were still sitting. You did your best to ignore him, chatting to one of the girls at the table instead. You laughed and did a few lines, generally relaxing into the evening. So relaxed you didn’t notice the newest member of the group until he finally addressed you.
“Don’t I know you?” You looked over and panic spread over you like a bucket of ice water over your head sobering you almost instantly. He did know you. The man before you was the first man you had arrested, almost six months ago. He must have been bailed out for jail. 
“No,” You answered confidently. You didn’t lie. You didn’t know him, not really.
“Gabriel, sit down!” María cheered, “Isabela this is my cousin, Gabriel. Gabriel, Isabela,” She introduced you. Her cousin. Of course. You smiled politely, praying the dim lights would hide the nervous sweat that had overtaken you. 
Gabriel looked confused but didn’t say anything if he did recognise you. Not that that would matter anyway, as soon as he spoke to Diego his memory would no doubt be jogged. If he found out you were a DEA agent you would be dead. You had to leave.
“Here take my seat, I’ve got to get some air for a minute,” You stood up, letting him take your place next to Maria. You caught Diego’s suspicious look as you walked past, spotting the nearest exit door. 
Your hands were shaking, your body not sure what to do with itself. The cocaine and alcohol said to go back inside and take them all out. What was left of your rational brain was consumed by fear and kept you outside. It was bad enough if someone like Senator Parreño had suspicions about you but Diego? Gabriel? Diego had already shown he wasn’t afraid to threaten you in public. Of the two of them joined heads they would connect the dots and your cover would be blown wide open. So would you, you thought morbidly. Coke and anger never mixed well. 
You took breathes of the warm summer air, leaning against the wall of the club as you tried to calm yourself down. You shouldn’t have taken the last shot, now verging over the edge of blacking out; your vision was spotty, sound not registering properly and your tongue felt heavy in your mouth. 
You wondered if Steve and Javi were nearby, the fresh air having the opposite effect than you’d wanted. You would blackout and you were going to need help to get home if you did. But you didn’t recall either of the men telling you where they were going, they could be anywhere in the city. 
Stumped for the moment, you decided to wait it out, lighting a cigarette hoping that might help sober you up. You pulled the packet from your purse
“Need a light?” A man appeared next to you, lighter in hand. You nodded and he flicked the flame up, you bent over and lit your cigarette between your teeth. 
“Thanks,” You mumbled, turning away from him, hoping he would leave. He didn’t. Instead, the man continued to stare at you, following you into your personal space as you shuffled away from him. 
“Can I help you?” You snapped, immediately getting a bad feeling about him. You crossed your arms over your chest, frowning at him. 
“No need for that tone baby. Come on, I wanna talk to you,” He purred. His eyes dipped to your cleavage, a lustful look in his eyes. 
“I’m not interested,” You said, stepping backwards away from the man. He seemingly didn’t hear you, continuing to get into your personal space, arms reaching out to grab your hips. 
“You were interested earlier. Come on, baby,” He purred, pulling you close to him, pressing his hips against yours. 
“Don’t fucking touch me!” You yelled, pushing him off hard enough to make him stumble backwards. 
“Fucking bitch,” He growled. 
If you were sober the situation would have a very swift end. You would punch him square in the face and he would leave you alone, scuttling away with a broken jaw and a shattered ego. However, you were not in a state to do that now. He had the upper hand. All you could do was run, hoping once you were back amongst people he wouldn’t attack you. You looked up the alley, the open street was just a few feet away. 
You bolted.
Unfortunately just as you didn’t have enough coordination to punch the man, you didn’t have enough to run in heels on the uneven floor. Not even ten foot away your legs wobble, heels falling into a pothole sending you forward. You fell into a dumpster, head hitting the corner of the metal with a thud. You yelped, vision going black for a moment as you lay on the concrete. 
“Hey hey hey,” A man ran over, instantly scaring the man off of you. He knelt by your side and helped you up from where you’d fallen. You groaned and pushed yourself up, head throbbing harshly, warm liquid trickling down your face. Your world was spinning even with your eyes closed. “Y/n, Fuck are you okay?”
“Get off me!” You exclaimed, trying to push the stranger off, not that your shaking arms were very effective. 
“Y/n hey it’s me, you’re okay!” You looked up and saw Steve through a haze of blurred vision. You squinted as something dripped over your eye. Steve then saw the cut to your head, “Oh shit,” Your eyes are glassy and blown out, you mumbled something to him and pushed yourself out of his reach again, wobbling and tipping backwards. He caught you before you hit the floor again. “Y/n what are you doing out here? Weren’t you with your friends?”
“Her brother was the first guy,” You said, your speech slurred so much Steve barely understood what you were saying.
“Rookie, you’re not making sense. What are you on about?” 
“I’m so fucked,” You sighed, letting your head rollback. You giggled as the world spun. 
“Yeah, I can tell, come on let’s get you home,” Steve stood up, holding his hands out to you and pulled you up to standing again. 
“Where’s Peña?” You asked. 
“At the bar,” 
“I want to go talk to him, let’s go talk to him!” You exclaimed. You began to walk in the opposite direction, dragging Steve along by the arm. He pulled you back with ease. 
“You can talk to him in the morning, we’re going home,” He insisted.
“But I have to tell him about the brother he’s going -,” Your rambling was interrupted as you threw up, barely missing Steve’s leg. He grimaced and jumped out of the way, “I have to talk to him,” You said quietly once you were done. 
“Tomorrow, Kid,” He repeated himself.
You pouted, tears of frustration welling up in your eyes but you didn’t fight him. Despite how drunk you were you knew that going home would realistically be the best course of action right now. You could barely string a sentence together let alone get anything important out coherently.
Steve got you into a taxi, luckily the driver paid no attention to the blood dripping down your face. You were falling asleep on his shoulder as you pulled up to the apartment, Steve pulled you out of the car and up the stairs to the apartment. Only when he opened the door, he was met by Javier and Vanessa also on their way inside.
“Woah!” Javier instantly turned his full attention to you when he saw the state you were in, hanging onto Steve’s sleeve, “What happened?” 
“Some guy tried to touch her up, she hit her head, I’ve got it covered,” Steve explained.
“Hey Baby,” You grinned, obviously giving Javi a once over. 
“She doesn’t look alright,” Vanessa commented, “Did she just call you baby?”
“It’s a long story,” Javi dismissed the comment. “She doesn’t look okay,”
“I’ve got it covered. I’ll get her to throw up and get some water to sober her up,” Steve said, “We’ll be okay, won’t we Rook?”
“Fine and dandy!” You grinned.
“If you’re sure,” Javi said hesitantly. You were gone, hanging onto Steve’s arm to hold yourself up. Your eyes were blown out and blank, if you remembered anything in the morning it would be a miracle. His first reaction was to help you, not sure Steve could handle you alone. Steve wasn’t exactly sober himself, sinking a good few beers with Javier in the bar before he’d left. However, his decision was made for him as you and Steve began walking up the stairs, Vanessa’s hands were back on him and any worry was squashed as she dragged him into his apartment.
Upstairs, Steve took you into his apartment. He took you to the bathroom, sat you on top of the toilet and rooted around the medicine cabinet to find some cleaning supplies so he could patch up your bleeding head. 
“Connie’s probably got something in here,” He rooted through the cabinet. Connie had gone back to Miami for the week to see her family, inconveniently right when her skills were needed. Steve’s tipsy attempt at first aid would have to do,“Ah-ha! Here we go, clean that cut out with this,”
“Ow!” You whined, flinching away from him quickly when he showed you the antiseptic bottle. 
“I didn’t touch you,” Steve chuckled, “Hold still,” Carefully he poured the liquid over a cotton ball, took hold of your face in the other hand and dabbed the cotton on your cut. 
“Ow! Steve that fucking hurt,” You complained, flinching away from him as the alcohol stung the wound on your head. You frowned at him, tearing up a little. 
“Don’t be a baby,” 
“I am a baby!” You exclaimed. Steve grabbed hold of you again, he needed to clean the wound if it was going to heal properly. You whined and hissed at him but eventually, it was clear. 
“Look, all done, got the grit out,”
“Thanks, Steve,” You kissed his cheek quickly. 
“You’re welcome,” He laughed awkwardly. “Come on, you can’t sleep on my toilet. Bedtime,”
“You’re not my type,” You scrunched your nose and leant away from him. 
 “Ouch way to break my heart Rook,” Steve chuckled, “No, you’re going to your own bed, by yourself,”
“It's so far away!” You whined. 
“It's across the hall!” He copied your tone making you laugh. 
Steve pulled you up from the toilet and managed to wrangle you across the hall. Half asleep, leaning into Steve before you even got inside the apartment, you fell into bed without protest. Steve pulled off your shoes, throwing them on the ground before stumbling back to his apartment to collapse in his bed. 
Waking up in your apartment unsure of how you got there, was a strange feeling. What was even stranger was the harsh throbbing on your head. You blindly brought a hand to the sight, recoiling instantly as you touched something sore. You sat up, slowly opening your eyes to the daylight and looked at your reflection in the mirror opposite your bed. 
You groaned when you saw the gash on your forehead. Dried blood sat in the creases of your neck, and underside of your jaw as well as being crusted into your hair. You tried to remember how you’d gotten the injury but came up blank. You couldn’t remember anything from the night before. Not unusual for your almost nihilistic habits, but it was concerning given the infliction. 
You looked at the clock. 9 am. You’d slept in. Since you were up you decided to clean yourself up. You padded to your bathroom, wincing at the harsh light inside and the grinding sound of the extractor fan. You filled the sink with warm water and gently cleaned the blood from your face with a cloth, only once stopping to throw up into the toilet. 
You showered, hot steam help clear your brain fog but not helping the cut on your forehead which now stung immensely. But that wasn’t the feeling you were concentrating on. 
A new kind of hunger, one you weren’t yet familiar with had settled in on the back of your tongue. A repeating idea chanting over and over in your head. It had partly been cocaine’s fault you’d got into this mess, but it would get you out of this hangover now. 
You remembered you had some in your jacket pocket from the day before, leftover. Once you’d thought about it there was no stopping you. You didn’t have to take it all, you could stop yourself if you wanted. You pulled the tin out from your coat, sit it down on your dressing table while you pulled on some clothes. 
 You sat back at the dressing-table again once you were done and stared at the box. You’d not done it here more than once or twice. Never by yourself. Something about being at home with it made you feel guilty, possibly because you were surrounded by your friends who also happened to be DEA agents who would kill you if they found the stuff in the building. 
You picked up the box, contemplating it. You could get something done if you took it. Wouldn’t have to sit in your hungover state and wallow in self-pity until the headache left. You could go for a walk. Do nice things. Taking the cocaine would bring you nice things, as it always did. 
You opened it. 
“Morning,” Javier’s voice inside your apartment suddenly startled you, causing you to spill the contents of your box all over your dressing table. 
“Fuck,” You swore out loud. 
“Okay in there?” You regretted giving him a key. You did not need the interruption. His voice snapped you back to reality. You decided you didn’t have time, or rather not wanting to be caught red-handed, you decided to leave it and greet your surprise guest. 
“Good morning,” You said brightly, opening and closing your bedroom door tightly behind you. Javier was standing in the middle of your living room, a book in hand flicking through it. He discarded it back to the coffee table where he’d found it when you appeared. 
“Just wanted to check you were alright, you looked rough last night,” Javi said, “that cut looks sore,”
“It stings but it’ll be ok in a few days,” You shrugged. Javi looked at you strangely, “Did you come up here for something?” You asked. 
“You don’t remember what today is?” He asked. You frowned and thought for a moment. 
“It’s your birthday?” You asked slowly. 
“No,”
“It’s my birthday?”
“I don’t know when you’re birthday is,” 
“Javi I’ve obviously forgotten please just tell me,” You pleaded. 
“Searchblok, you and Steve swapped. Remember?”
“Shit!” You exclaimed. How could you have forgotten?! You scrambled back into your room to get changed, boxer shorts and a hole-ridden t-shirt wouldn’t cut it. 
“I should write you up for the mess you were in last night,” He called through the door as you rushed to get dressed, pulling on the nearest jeans on your floor. That’s not the only thing you should write me up for, you thought looking at the cocaine on your dressing table.
“I should write you up for sleeping with hookers,” You said back.
“Nowhere in my contract does it say I can’t! You however have a reckless behaviour clause,” He said. Your heart stopped at that, opening the door quickly to pop your head out.
“Javi-“
“I’m joking Rook, don’t worry!” Javier laughed. You rolled your eyes and shut the door again, pulling on a fresh shirt. A few seconds later you stepped out, buttoning the last of the clasps on your shirt. “I was worried about you but you’re fine so we’ll forget it ever happened,” 
“Thanks, Baby,” You grinned at him. Javi rolled his eyes.
“You need to stop that though,” 
 “You love it,” You teased him. He didn’t reply, turning on his heel and walking out. You hesitated for a moment, glancing back at your bedroom door. The coke was still lined up in there, calling to you. It would only take a few seconds to do it and get rid of your hangover for a few hours.
“Rookie, hurry up!” Javi called you from the hallway, audibly impatient. You decided against it, grabbing your keys and a jacket and running to catch up with him. He was already waiting by the truck by the time you got downstairs. “Did anything interesting happen last night, then?” Javi asked. You tried to think for a moment, you remembered something important had happened, something you’d wanted to tell him last night but you couldn’t remember what. You shrugged.
“Apart from getting this,” You gestured to the injury to your forehead, “I can’t remember. There was something but I don’t know,” 
“Can’t have been very important then,” Javi added. You shrugged and shook your head. 
“Guess not,” 
Next Chapter  -->
--
Finally we’ve come full circle, I am so sad it’s over I have absolutely loved writing this series. Again I want to say a massive thank you to everyone’s that read the series, it means more than you could imagine. I love you all. I’m going to have a cry and make a start on all the other things I’ve been neglecting to write this.
The ending is already written and posted so if you haven’t read it go enjoy :))
tag list: @beskar-falcon  @peterssweetpea @beskarbabs @all-hallows-evie @harrys-stan @wille-zarr @danniburgh @rentheisopod @urbankaite2 @whataloadofmalarkey @ahsofka @yeetus-my-feetus @sara-alonso @xiao-lusi @all-good-things-have-an-ending @eternallyvenus @ajeff855 @mayangel19 @1950schick @pedrosmustache @wantingtobekorra @balmasedas @angelsunflxwer @brujademente​ @kingsmanandqueens​ @igotissueswithfictionalmen​
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hobiwonder · 4 years ago
Text
Bloom | 01
Genre: Hybrid!Namkook. fluorescence by @jincherie​ AU 
Pairing: foxhybrid!Namjoon x Reader x bunnyhybrid!Jungkook ;(
Warnings: language. mention of hybrid trafficing/being sold into sex trafficing, fluff holy shit, angst, Smut (future), very cuddly and shy jungkook, stuttery shy BOYS. I really just wrote this for me.
Words: 5k+
Summary: In a world where humanity is increasingly motivated by how much cash can be made off of... well anything, you’re a human and hybrid rights lawyer. You will do anything to save the ones that never had a choice  right from the date of their conception. Even if that means, adopting two hybrids that you absolutely did not mean to. 
a/n: hello hello im back from the dead iuhbIUHBUYBGUY okay so, yes this isnt baby baby but i am a bit behind on that so i really hope posting this instead can satiate my sluts for a few more days until i have that done. I have a lot of this written so I will post this on a semi-regular schedule. rest of the schedule i posted will stay the same. it’s just baby baby that’s kicking my BUTT!!!! Lastly, I started writing this before Goo Hara passed away. Opening this document made me a little sad and also happy when i remember Hara and her love for eco-friendly fashion. I guess, this is kind of a tribute to her? anyhow, I hope you guys like it. please please please, validate me. :>)
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"Y/n they're going to be sold to this man who works for a black market. What do I do? Oh god. I-I didn't know our company was into that business."
Your best friend is nearing the point of tears and you can understand her frustration. "Listen, Hara, take a deep breath and tell me when exactly this is happening."
A deep breath is taken as you'd suggested, before you hear Hara's voice again through the phone. "Okay... Okay. I was just told by Minseok that there is an auction for the remaining two from the past failed batches. Apparently two others have been adopted and the rest have been pawned off somewhere. I'm not sure. From our division of the company, these two are the ones that have not gone for further testing to be open to the regular public. A-And so now there is a super secret auction happening tonight. It's not open to the regular public as you already know but staff members are able to attend. What do I do y/n? I can't afford them. I have my own to deal with. These poor boys will go to some horrible owner who will use them f-for god knows what."
Now Hara was crying. Openly and brokenly for the possible fate of these 'failed' hybrids that her company had produced. This was a sticky situation and even you, a Human and hybrid rights lawyer, had limited ideas as to what could be done on such a short notice. But you were not about to give up.
"Hara, don't. They will not be bought by some hybrid trafficker okay? I won't let it happen. I will... I will at least try. It's my job, remember?"
Your optimism is convincing enough. And you wholeheartedly believed that something would give. These big corporations had their toes in everywhere and you didn’t yet know if they had already had a designated buyer on the black market they pawned their hybrids off to. Where there was money to be made - no company had morals rigid enough to stop themselves from the temptation. You already lived in an age where human trafficking was no longer a cause for activism or big debates. Not when more species - man made or not - had been created to take advantage of.
“Okay yeah. You’re a badass lawyer, you must have something up your sleeve right?” Her voice is shaky but you confirm with an enthusiastic nod she can’t see.
“Of course! I’ll kick their asses. Surely this can’t be legal? No blackmarket is. Let me have a look at what can be done. I’m assuming you can bring a plus one tonight?”
“Yeah I-I was given a ticket. You’ll be coming with me right?”
“That’s why I asked, silly.” Her relieved chuckle brings a smile to your own lips.
“I’ll see you there. Don’t give up hope until I do, alright?”
“Okay... You’re right.”
_____________________________________________________________________________
“Fuck this. Fuck my life.” The curses escaped your mouth left and right as you looked over the dozens and dozens of papers splayed out on your oak desk.
Even your comfortable office chair couldn’t stop the knot building up between your shoulder blades. This was bad. Really bad. Corporate law allowed unfit materials to be sold to third parties. What these third parties did with those materials - the company of origin was no longer liable for. In short: These hybrids were going to be bought by someone sketchy with a crystal clear profile and no paper trail unless someone bid higher and bought them.
None of these bastards were rookies. They had solid paperwork where necessary and it would be near impossible to prove their illegal activities when all of them took place on the dark web. A place that opened up more threats and risks than solutions. No legislation covered hybrid rights that weren’t even registered yet. Whoever bought them would have to register them and then the hybrids would be able to receive the minimum protection they had a right to.But you can bet your father’s company that whoever bought them will never register them. Essentially these hybrids will be wiped out from the system.
Fingertips tapping against the wood, each passing minute was precious time lost. it was already 5pm. You had to leave for the dreaded auction in less than an hour and hour and yet here you sat in your chair. Hands itching to do something other than pick up the phone and tell Hara that you were at a loss. What could you do? Who would take them? You didn’t know anyone that was ready to add not one but two hybrids to their household. And ones that were not fully approved to be released. You couldn’t just lie and pawn them off to just anyone. Then you would not be any better than the company trying to get rid of them.
Sighing, you pack up the papers and documents you had initially thought would help. They were of no use anymore. All you could do was go and offer support to Hara. Or Maybe you were going because you still had hope that there would be someone who would save those hybrids. Hope was a dangerous thing for a woman like you but you had it. This was no time to wallow. So you smooth your skirt, touch up your makeup and put on your heels that had men double take.
Maybe you could scare and/or seduce these people in changing their mind?
You laugh at your absurdity, glancing in the mirror one last time before you leave with stacks of files in your hands. You could at least stall them.
_____________________________________________________________________________
“Y/n! Thank god you’re here.” I’m not so sure about that. Though you opt for a gentle smile and meet her embrace enthusiastically.
You can hear the sniffles coming from Hara who has her head buried in your shoulder. “Hey, no crying okay? No matter what happens.” The comment has her pulling back just as quickly.
“What do you mean? You have a plan for tonight r-right? Y/n..”
How could you do this? Lie to her? This was not fair on her. On anyone really. It wasn’t your fault and neither hers for whatever would happen tonight. She needed to know what to expect. As much as your heart clenched and ached to say the words you were about to; it was important to mentally prepare for the worst.
“Hara... I couldn’t find anything.” Your frown is apologetic. Trying to convey how really truly sorry you were but it doesn’t stop the tears from brewing up in her eyes.
“Oh.. I thought- thought they had a chance y/n.” You reach out for her hand, wanting to alleviate her hurt as soon as possible.
“I will at least try to see who will buy them okay? Don’t worry. We can keep an eye out on who gets them. They will be alive at least, right?” Your attempt at finding a silver lining doesn’t make her look any more reassured than you felt.
Glancing at your watch, you motion towards the building. “Come on. Let’s go before they try and kick us out.”
Hara nods, numbly leading the way towards an auditorium where several people had already taken their seats. You’re not sure how many people you were expecting, but it definitely wasn’t... this. There were at best 10 people here. All ten seemingly looked like they knew each other. This could only mean one thing. That this sale was to some degree, arranged. As in, multiple buyers were from the same company posing as separate customers to maximise their chances of acquiring the hybrids.
“Hara, have you seen any of these people before?” Your whisper has her craning her neck to have a good look at all of the men sitting in the front few rows.
“No, I don’t think so.” Her furrowed brows turn to you instead, “Do you recognise any of them?”
Shaking your head, you follow her down the stairs to sit in the row behind the last pair of buyers who were sitting.
“Whoever they are... they don’t look like they are all strangers.” Hara is gripping on to your arm when she hears you, visibly nervous once again. “I’m just speculating, okay?”
Your attempt to ease her, once again, is not enough. But you don’t try again since you don’t even believe your own words. The auctioneer however, stops you from thinking further about the impending events of the night. The man stands in a lab coat, glancing at his watch before he brings his mouth closer to the mic on the dice.
“Let’s begin gentleman... and ladies.” He seems to be surprised to see you and Hara sitting at the back. And before he begins further, he motions someone. Another man approaches the auctioneer and listens carefully as the other whispers. A few seconds later, his eyes fall back to where you sat with your best friend.
Hara’s grasp on your arm tightens once again when the man heads to your general direction. On instinct, your back straightens, posture more solid than before so as to not give anyone the wrong impression that they can mess with you unwarrantedly.
“Excuse me Miss.?”
“Yes?” Your curt reply surprises him but he recovers fast, glancing towards Hara before talking to you again.
“Are you a guest of Ms. Hara?”
“Obviously.” Your unwavering gaze visibly unnerves him. It was obvious to anyone there but you had an idea this was some sort of test.
“May I see your ticket please?” His bogus smile annoys you more than it should. Nonetheless, Hara is fishing out the ticket from her purse and showing the man. He inspects it longer than he should and finally walks back to the auctioneer to let him know you had the right to be here.
“Who would do that if they weren’t running a hoax?” You ask Hara before you can stop yourself.
“Alright. Apologies for the delay. We will now begin. As you are all aware, we are auctioning two of our very elite hybrids from a rare batch. They have not progressed to the next stage of screenings and tests due to some technical difficulties. Thus, we are here to give them a chance at a new home rather than a painful end.” He looks in the audience for effect. Euthanasia is what he meant.
“These hybrids are fully functional however lack a few abilities they were initially designed for. Due to these technical issues deeming them failed to proceed, they are available for purchase at a much lower cost than what they are sold for on the market.” The auctioneer looks so smug the urge to smack his across the face is almost irresistible.
“Right, bring them out Wonho.” Everyone is watching carefully, waiting for the ‘failed’ hybrids and you don’t know what you were expecting.
Not what you see though. Definitely not. Because the two - tall - hybrids entering the stage are not what you expect. Peach and silver tones greet your eyes as well as incredibly sculpted faces.  The peach haired hybrid seems to cling to the silver haired one. The man leading the two hybrids seems to be frustrated with their slow pace, giving the peach haired hybrid a little shove and there is only so much you can do to not yell at the top of your lungs for him to get his hands off of them.
The man sighs, letting the two hybrids to just stand in the middle when the peach haired one does not stand apart from the other hybrid. While the shorter of the two hybrids - and much, much shyer - looks around anxiously at the people in the auditorium, the silver haired one has his features set in stone. His eyes don’t look alarmed, they don’t seem scared. He just looks numb. He stares ahead at the people sitting in front of him while the peach haired boy visibly shakes, breathing fast and eyes flitting across every surface. He takes a step back, hiding part of his body behind his silver haired companion for comfort.
“There you have them. The peach haired specimen is a Oryctolagus cuniculus or - a bunny in more simplistic terms. The silver haired specimen is an arctic fox, Vulpes lagopus. Both hybrids are off a rare species and very sought after on the market. Due to technical issues, once again, unfortunately, we are only able to sell them in a pair. They are useless on their own.”
The candid way the auctioneer speaks of them has your blood boiling. But what gets you more is the laughter that sounds in the auditorium. Did these assholes think they were funny? The hybrids - entirely human or not - were present in the room with them. Did they not have any ounce of respect for them? Hara was not faring any better. Watching with a frown as chatter continued among the buyers. The bunny looked even more disturbed, looking around at every man in the front few rows - before his eyes landed on you.
The gasp that leaves you is abrupt. His pained expression holds your gaze, eyes wide and chest heaving. The bunny jumps when the auctioneer speaks again.
“We will now start the bid at $1000. $1200 anyone?” Several hands go up before the auctioneer raises the price to $1400.
Bald, greasy men exchanging glances and crude remarks as they talk amongst themselves. Your heart is thumping, your blood thinning. With each passing second, your throat seems to be closing up. There was nothing you could do to save them, was there? The further the price went up, the more panicked and distraught the bunny looked, gripping his fox companion harder, hiding behind him even more. The silver haired fox looked much like what you had stopped Hara from looking only this morning. Hopeless. His mouth was set in a thin line - just taking in the scenario in front of him. It was obvious he saw his fate before his very eyes and instead of futilely hoping that someone would save them - he stares his aggressors in the eyes.
“Brilliant! We’re at $3000 for the gentleman in the first row. Anyone for $3500?” The said man looked positively smug, sitting with his legs spread lewdly. Most likely sure that no one would contest that price.
Definitely not you.
“$4000.” Your voice yelling above everyone else is even foreign to your own ears. An outer body experience as you watch yourself look the auctioneer straight in his eyes, daring anyone in the room to go higher up on the price. But most of all, you watch the silver haired hybrid’s gaze waver for the first time - looking at you in such surprise like it was the first time he was noticing you.
“Ah... Anyone for $4500?” Only one other hand goes up. The man that had been the prospective buyer before. His face is ballooning with the amount of blood that’s rushing to it.
“Y/n? What are you doin?!” Hara’s frantic whispering flies over your head as you call out once more.
“$6000. Final offer.” You look at the other men in the seats beneath you, challenging them to dispute your offer.
The atmosphere is tense, thick with the tension brewing inside the auditorium and yet you don’t shy away from the angry glares being shot your way. A minute passes. No more offers.
“Sold to Miss?”
“Y/n.”
“-Miss Y/n. Thank you all for participating.” The loud chatter is instantaneous as the auctioneer motions the other lab rat to, assumably, gather the hybrids and their things.
“Y/N! Oh my god.” Hara has all but engulfed you in a tight hug once more. Shaking you slightly out of your own shock. This was not what you had planned but it was done.
She finally pulls back, checking you over like you were ill. “A-Are you sure about this? Oh god, okay we need to head up to the podium.”
Just like she doesn’t wait for your answer, you had not waited for your own either. You hadn’t even asked yourself the question before you had so blindly bid on the two hybrids. You’d been waiting for someone to save them. Someone to come barging in and take them away from these cruel people. Never in a millenia had you thought that someone might be you.
“Here you are Miss. You can deposit a check right now or eftpos the payment. Up to you.”
Benumbed, you take out your phone to open the phone banking application. When you’ve made sure there are sufficient funds transferred from your savings account, you wave your card in front of the auctioneer wordlessly. From the corner of your eyes, you can feel the two hybrids watching you. You wished they had at least let them wait in some sort of waiting room and not witness the jarring experience of several people bidding over them.
“Excellent! The transaction has been approved and a receipt will be emailed to you if you can fill out this form here.” Glancing at the hybrids standing a few feet away from you, clutching a duffle bag each, you try and put down your details as fast as you can.
They had already looked like they wanted to be as farther away from this place as possible and the feeling was mutual. Hara was beside you the whole time, waiting for any cue from you to provide some sort of support or whatever you needed her to do. And if your tongue worked - you would thank her as you filled out the space on the form asking you of your email address. It was sickening how easy it was for you to just... buy them! Would they not do a security or police check on you? Make sure that these hybrids are going to at least a safe home?
You were aware of the long process of hybrids that were ordered from the company. The company had a thorough process of making sure their clients were reputable and trust-worthy. That they wouldn’t do bodily harm to the hybrids but that was a facade so these companies wouldn’t have to spend money in compensation if a client had abused their hybrid in any way and had not been satisfied with what they had ordered. It was a guise. These people didn’t give two shits if the hybrids were not of expectation and couldn’t make them money.
“Am I done here?” Your tone was curt and the auctioneer could sense it.
The fact that you’d fished out more than enough cash for some ‘failed’ hybrids - he was interested in you as a potential future client. You were aware that hybrids of their breed went for $5000 - maximum. The previous greasy bald man had been close to closing a deal for $3000 until you had butted in. So obviously, they were going to kiss your ass.
“Yes Ma’am. That’s all we needed. The hybrids are good to go. Their bags have their guidebooks with them. Thank you for shopping with us.” his bright smile makes you want to hit him with your designer bag.
But even this leather was too good to be wasted on these assholes. “Y/N? Please look a little more friendly. You’ll scare the bunny away.” Hara is speed walking besides you, trying to convince you to soften your stance when you stop right before the bench they had been sitting on.
“Follow me, boys.” You’re not rude. You don’t sound mean either. But you don’t particularly sound like you wanted them. And as much as that was the truth to some degree, you didn’t not want them.
The silver haired hybrid hesitates - watching you with wide, curious eyes. Not the harsh way his eyes had scanned the room before but not exactly friendly and enthusiastic like the bunny. The bunny that was currently tugging on the silver fox’s sleeve wordlessly. His doe eyes silently ask his friend to follow you. But when his feet stay rooted to the same spot, you can’t help but sigh.
“Is there a problem?” A moment’s silence. Then finally the silver haired boy shakes his head, grasping the bunny’s hand and follows you out of the building.
Hara is gripping your hand, relieved tears in her eyes and you can’t keep looking. Because you couldn’t promise her that you would take good care of them. “Thank you Y/n. You didn’t have to do that but... but you did. You’re a good person and these boys are lucky to have you.”
Her eyes are earnest. You know she means every word and she can sense your inner turmoil at your own ability to take care of them. The boys can’t hear you both talking since they are standing near your car, obediently waiting for you. Taking a look at them huddled in the back seat, you turn back to Hara.
“Thanks Har. I will try my best. They deserve a shot at a normal and secure life. I won’t let you down.”
“And you,” she cups your face, making you look back at her. “You deserve love too. I have seen the bunny hybrid in the lab. He will heal all your wounds too. Please be happy and patient with them, okay?”
You nod, a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes but genuine nonetheless. “I’ll see you later. Love you.”
You just wave her goodbye, standing until her car pulls away. Looking back at the two boys waiting patiently in the car - you take a moment to gather yourself.
“Fuck... fuck. Fuck!” You don’t scream out loud. not really. But anyone walking by would be able to see you were stalling something. That something is going to your car and then going home.
Taking a deep breath, you decide to bite the bullet and face the reality. Getting in the driver’s seat, you look back at the two hybrids watching you from your rearview mirror. Giving them a small smile, you notice the bunny hybrid’s shoulders relax a little.
“Let’s go home.” Your voice is light and airy. Hoping to put them at ease. They were yours now.
You were their saviour.
_____________________________________________________________________________
“Home sweet home.” Letting them pass you, entering the condo, you let them take in their surroundings.
The bunny is still latched on to the taller hybrid’s flannel, hiding behind him when the fox hybrid comes to stand beside a couch. Both of them look at you - as if waiting for you to allow them to sit. The silver haired fox is holding on to the bunny’s hand, watching you with a dour look.
“Go on.” You head motions towards the comfortable three seater couch. “Have a seat. No need to be shy.”
Of course, you want to palm yourself after your remark. Of course they were shy. Well, the bunny mostly. The fox looked to be very suspicious and not exactly friendly. Though you could understand his apprehension. He was about to be sold to some very nefarious people. He seemed to be a bit older than the bunny and had a look of ambiance that only came with experiencing harsh times. Your heart felt for him.
The bunny doesn’t wait too long, sitting on the couch - well plopping is more like it - whereas the fox takes his time, battling with himself if he should or not. When you keep watching him, waiting for him to sit, he thankfully gives in and sits besides his friend.
Once you can tell that they are comfortable - as comfortable as they can be, you ask your first question. “So, what are your names?”
You smile at them gently, letting them know you are their friend. At least hoping that they can conclude that from the fact that you told them about their new home on the car ride over.
The bunny’s eyes are wide, face heating up as if you asked him a rather scandalous question and not just his name. Your heart skips a beat when the lovely blush blossoms across his face that’s hiding in the fox’s shoulder.
“Well? Can you tell me, bun? What’s your name?” Your question being directed to the bunny only makes the blush more visible. You could see his face reddening further in embarrassment and the colour being rather more visible on his neck too.
The smile doesn’t diminish from your face. Not even after seeing the way the fox is almost glaring at you but you were positive that the bunny wasn’t hiding because he was afraid of you.
“J-Jungkook. ‘m J-Jungk-kook” The answer proves to be too much for him to mumble, lips catching his plumper bottom lip as he peeks at you through one eye that isn’t hidden in the fox’s shoulder.
“Jungkook. That’s a lovely name, bun.” Your smile widens when you see the corners of his mouth stirring up a little at your compliment.
Your heart was so full. Never did you think you would feel these dizzying emotions at a pretty boy merely muttering his name. His name. If this was your reaction at finding out one of their names, you were not going to survive getting to know them before you went full mother-hen mode on anyone that tried to harm them.
“What about you, hm?” Your smile is a lingering effect of just looking at Jungkook’s adorable blushing face and you don’t let it falter even if the fox hybrid is visibly more aloof.
‘Be patient with them y/n.’ You remind yourself of Hara’s words over and over.
“Namjoon.” The smile halts briefly at the deep timbre of his tone. You had not been expecting him to sound like molten chocolate and sweeter than honey. You realise you wanted to hear him more. Hear him speak about mundane topics over and over because that’s how good he sounded to you.
“Namjoon.” the name rolls off your tongue smoothly, just like his voice. You’re still watching his face, waiting for any sort of reaction even if it’s not as endearing as Jungkook’s. Just something. But his face remains passive. A slight twitch of his lips but that’s it. The pessimistic part of your brain convinces you that it could have been a frown and not a smile that he’s fought away.
But you needed to remain positive.
“T-That’s… a very nice name too.” He doesn’t look convinced at your reply though. Namjoon continues to watch you and now you’re the one blushing from the heat of his stare.
Jungkook is watching Namjoon just as cautiously as you. Like he expected him to be like that. Austere and unwilling to be forthcoming with information about himself. Telling yourself that he’ll adjust with time, you opt for a smile that’s sent Jungkook’s way - making the bunny hide behind Namjoon again. Almost like when a child is cautious and shys away from a stranger they meet. That’s what it was.  A childlike innocence to Jungkook which awoke every instinct in you to protect him. Maybe that’s why his eyes had convinced you that you needed to take them home with you.
“Okay boys. I’ll show you to your rooms.” Furrowing your brows at the way Jungkook clutches Namjoon harder with panicked eyes, you turn around to look at them again.
“You don’t need to stay in separate rooms if you don’t want to, okay?” Namjoon regards you with a look before nodding - eyes cast down once again.
“Good. You both are very quiet but that’s okay - I can talk enough for the three of us.” The wink that you send Jungkook’s way only has him sputtering with embarrassment as the lovely rose tints his full round cheeks.
“But you do have to tell me when you are not okay with something, alright? I can’t read your pretty little heads.” As you say the last few words, your hand reaches out to shuffle the bunny’s peach hair.
What you don’t expect, is him flinching away so violently that even you are startled, taking a step back. Jungkook is hiding behind Namjoon completely now, shaking and you want to reach out. Say sorry and take it all back.
“I’m… I’m so sorry. I didn’t-”
“Hey, kook, it’s alright. It’s okay.” Namjoon’s voice reverberates through the quiet hallway, soothing the bunny’s shaking frame, whispering gentle assurances and you’re about to choke up.
What happened to him? Who did this to him. For him to be this scared. Watching Namjoon hug the shaking bunny tightly, sniffling away in his chest, only makes you feel more guilty at your brash treatment. Were you coming on too strong? God you were so out of your depth.
“I didn’t mean to scare you Jungkook. Honey..” You’re trying your best to reach out to him but the way Namjoon stands between you and him like a wall - it’s obvious he was waiting for something like this to happen. He was cautious of you and now his beliefs have been reinforced to not trust you or whatever nonsense he’s thinking.
You couldn’t blame him though. You really couldn’t.
“Please be careful, miss. He’s not a toy.” Namjoon’s voice trembles. Just the way - you now notice - his bottom lip does. He’s holding back tears and you really don’t know what to do. Except try your best to take their pain away.
“I’m.. I’m really sorry Namjoon. I didn’t mean to upset him.” You open the door to the room quickly, making sure there are blankets and pillows on the bed before coming out to tell them.
“Take him inside Namjoon. I’ll… I’ll leave you two alone, for now. Let me know if you need anything?” Namjoon merely nods, not being able to look you in the eyes but the bite of his lip tells you he’s trying to hold it together.
Jungkook’s hiccups catch your attention and you pull yourself out of your self-pity session. Only wanting to make sure that both of the hybrids are comfortable and just not feeling the way they are right now. Gesturing your head forward again, you nod at Namjoon when he looks at you one last time before heading into the room. The bunny holds onto Namjoon tightly, letting him walk into the room and when they are fully in - you close the door behind them. Giving them their privacy and also because you had a feeling they needed to be by themselves to really understand their current situation. That you were their new owner and this was their home.
A permanent home.
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